Hollywood Ending...

Executive Summary: There were no consequences for the beloved remaining players.

Years ago, I would've guessed the final episode would be more open-ended -- a mixture of promising developments with something ominous in the background threatening to repeat the endless cycle. Despite how glum everyone seemed, they ended up quite well. Bronn got his riches. Tyrion and Jon kept their heads. Sansa is a Queen. Arya will enjoy her adventures. Bran is King. Brienne protects him. Sam's a man of power. And so on. Where are the consequences? Where's the intrigue?

Jon is basically an idiot. He needs to be talked into killing Daenerys. Then again, killing evil people puts him on the path to becoming some sort of mass slaughtering despot. Leading an army to take Winterfell from Ramsay presents no moral quandaries, but bringing one to King's Landing is rife with them. Arya and Tyrion initially appeal to Jon's sense of self-preservation.

I'm not at all sure why in the hell Grey Worm just allows the nobles of these newly conquered lands to vote someone else in after his queen is murdered. He allows Tyrion to escape from death row (on his Queen's order!) and ascend to Hand of the King?? And there's a drawn out negotiation for Jon? He's OK with killing everyone, but agrees to a deal allowing the Queenslayer to live. A deal that's ultimately unenforceable. Grey Worm's all over the place. Literally. One moment he's slitting the throats of troops, but then hurries around the city to be waiting for Jon atop the steps.

Daenerys gives this speech about continuing to burn kingdoms in order to set them free. What the fuck? Even if you go with the "let it be fear" nonsense, aren't most of these places going to be scared shitless? And Arya's not going to do jack diddly squat to Daenerys?

So Jon tricks and murders an unarmed white woman. In her second to last moments, she didn't apparently see him as a threat; she wants them to rule the world together. But I thought his life was in peril since he's the "rightful" heir? I guess that only figures in with the old Daenerys, even though people want to say she was the same person all along. Or something.

He could just pour some bleach on the blood stain, say "bitch is crazy -- she torched the throne, left on her dragon, and put me in charge until she returns." But no. So much of this nonsense occurs off-screen, probably because it's too ridiculous to see play out. The Queen is murdered but the Dothraki and Unsullied are just like, "Yeah, whatever. We didn't really like her because she never got us Starbucks."

Also, her death occurred so easily. If there was supposed to be a tremendous internal struggle because Jon loved her... well, they never did a good job establishing that relationship in the first place. The actors lacked chemistry.

They put a disabled storytelling boy on the throne. Yeah, storytellers SHOULD have the most power in a society. Even though D&D don't actually believe that, it's vulgar to have these characters spout it. Almost as vulgar as using democracy for a cheap joke. Is everyone even aware of Bran's magical powers? Has he told all of the high-borns present about their most embarrassing moments? And he's got a great, inspirational name -- "Bran the Broken."

The best moment -- by far -- was Brienne writing about Jaime. The worse moment -- by far -- was that stupid small council meeting. Aside from the on-the-nose book, the camera pulls out whilst they squabble like at the end of a moronic romantic comedy.

Jon doesn't even serve at Castle Black, so they reneged on the deal. He goes North in search of Wildling pussy. And he's on a horse while small children trudge. Jerk.