Stoopid things you did when you were young (and a schmuck)

In high school, we played Killers. If you saw the movie T.A.G. you have a slight idea of what it was. It was a chain assassination game in which everyone was given a target but didn't know who was targeting them. Once you "killed" your target, you got their target and accumulated loot. The circle shrunk until it was down to one winner. One person would referee it and keep track of targets, kills, and fake money. We used fake bank accts to purchase toy guns and other clever means of faux murder so as to equalize the advantage players with younger siblings had (supply of toy weapons at home).

No kills at school grounds, police stations, banks, from moving cars, nor places the target works at. Kills with more than one witness result in disqualification. Bypass that by putting a mask on (and take off) in private and THEN you can run into the McDonalds they are eating in and spray them with plastic bullets/discs in front of countless witnesses.

The ref would make cost judgements calls on weapons and supplies. Vaseline on a car door handle as contact poison. 10 second delay recording of a shouted "BOOOM!" on a cassette snuck into their car player. One guy even rigged an ingenious shoebox bomb with a can of hairspray, tape and rubber bands.

My morning routine included sliding out of a back window and up onto the roof to survey the yard in case my killer was hiding near my car to ambush me. It made the mundane events of the day exciting, always watching your back while plotting your next move.

You were not allowed to kill anyone other than your target or your killer (if you figured out whom the were). However, any player with a drawn weapon was fair game. Because of this, some of us would overtly stalk a non-target player in hopes of initiating a mutual drawn-gun shootout. And there were some fine chain reaction bloodbaths indeed.

Many of our weapons were very realistic. The males in the game leaned toward that. We were very lucky we didn't get shot by police.

When I was a kid my gang and another gang would play war by throwing bricks at one another atop of a couple of abandoned farm buildings that faced each other, I’m amazed none of us got seriously hurt!

We didn’t aim for the head obviously, but it sucked if you were the smallest!

I think I was 9 or 10 and the bay in the small town in eastern Canada where I was born filled up with ice flows. It was the first time anyone had ever seen it. A bunch of us kids went out on these flows jumping from one to the other. If any of us had fallen between the flows we would never have been found.

Jeez, everyone here was? a criminal.

Too many to list. But a big one was a summer full of BB gun wars in the woods by my house in the 80’s.

I have to check the relevant statutes of limitation first.

I spent the summer of 1990 tripping on acid and not sleeping. Really not sure how I ever found the other side of that one, but here I am!

(Fuckin' Christ, I'm just realizing that's over 30 years ago now!!)

This memory just came to me, when I was pretty little, maybe 5 or 6, me and some other kids found a bullet while playing on a beach. We decided, quite logically, to try to pound it between two rocks to make it go "bang." Sheesh! *pinches self to make sure I'm actually still alive*

Here's one, I was probably about 12, I had one of those vibrating football fields where the "players" would vibrate around on the surface. Anyway, I wondered what would happen if I cut the power cord and then plugged the severed end into the electrical socket. Well, it arced and send a bolt of electricity across my bedroom and blew one of the breakers in the house. Scared the crap out of me!

Rode my bike down a road where the speed limit is 45 miles an hour.

Rode off on my bike because I didn't want to clean my room like my older sister said and mainly because she said she had called the cops and they were coming to arrest me for not cleaning my room. My parents were gone on an errand.

Trying to run away from home.