MovieChat Forums > Army of the Dead (2021) Discussion > Fun But Stupid: Count the Ways

Fun But Stupid: Count the Ways

posted 3 years ago by Goliard (1413)
14 replies | jump to latest

1) Super zombie with the potential to destroy the world is being transported (where? why? who knows/cares) by clueless poorly-trained soldiers, in a container that can be damaged in a car crash. Wha?
2) Spoof an elaborate plan to break into a zombie infested area to crack a safe, when all you really want is a vial of alpha zombie blood, which would be a gazillion times easier to execute.
3) Hire a safecracker to open the safe. Because I wrote the combination down on a napkin, and lost it when I went to Chili's and they put too much sauce on my awesome blossom. Wha?
4) Establish zombie animals as a Thing, thereby invalidating the entire worldbuilding effort. One zombified bird, and the planet is DONE. One zombified fish, and it's done to the bazillionth degree.
5) Muddy the timeline (this actually helps the movie tremendously, so I get it, narratively. For example:)
6) For some reason create a "quarantine zone" that's maintained by the most ridiculous cliched set of characters ever, with the most ridiculous logistics ever, for the most incomprehensible reasons Ever.
7) Vary the abilities of the alpha zombies depending on plot convenience
8) Vary the abilities of the human combatants depending on plot convenience
9) Vary the effects of a zombie bite depending on plot convenience

. . .I could keep going, but this is the point where you either turn you brain off and accept the movie as seasoning for your popcorn, or turn the movie off and go read some Jack Vance.

6/10. Fun but Stupid.

[–] Kuurgen (20) 3 years ago

10. So you can't fly IN to Vegas, however, vehicles leaving should be no problem, especially with highly infectious zombies.

[–] UncleRuckis (2596) 3 years ago

On that note, I'm not sure how much time passed since Vegas was overrun and the heist, but it looks like a long time. Anyone who has worked in aviation will probably tell you that hinging your plan on the flight capability of a helo that has been sitting untouched for months or maybe years is batshit insane! Choppers need a good deal of maintenance and still crash even in under the best conditions. A lone pilot in a roof getting that thing flight ready in an hour or two is laughable.

[–] Goliard (1413) 3 years ago

I'm bored, gonna pile on:

11) Set off the world's only nuke w/no fallout or contaminants
12) Establish an absurdly porous line around the infected city, then sit on it. Instead of. . .you know. . .getting the military to go in there and KILL ALL THE ZOMBIES
13) Prep extensively for a zombie killing mission, but make sure you don't protect your bare arms/extremities. Because infection from bites isn't a thing
14) Add lines of exposition explaining how you're going to escape in the helicopter, then go out the ground floor and play with the zombie tiger instead

And the beat goes on. . .

[–] Jehosaphet (1055) 3 years ago

Yeah you're right this was a stupid movie. The cliches abounded, the characters did silly stuff..
Why did they have to make the bad guy so damn evil, too..."Haha I've locked you in and am taking the chopper, you're dead and I got you good haha!"
I wonder how much of this was intentional. Like the conversation they had when she came back with the chopper...with dude right on their heels. It was such a plot contrivance that it was almost surprising. Like, really? REALLY we're doing this now?

It almost seemed like this was done tongue in cheek or something, maybe a little wink to all the past zombie movies? Like shoe-horning in having to kill Dad in the end, as he turned...you can't miss THAT beat in a zombie film, you know? Having to kill off a loved one.
I don't know, the movie had amazing action but made you work pretty hard to suspend disbelief. Like it was bullying your disbelief or something. Believe THIS bitch!

[–] Alex (1495) 3 years ago

Why'd they make Bad guy so stupid too? He said he was going to the roof to take the helicopter, but after he locked the rest of the idiots in the basement, he goes outside? to the ground level? where zombie tiger is? Huh? What?

[–] Goliard (1413) 3 years ago

(See #14 😇 )

[–] Alex (1495) 3 years ago

Missed it in the replies. I'm sowwy

[–] Jehosaphet (1055) 3 years ago

I WOULD like an explanation to that...are we sure he was on the ground level? Yeah he JUST got done stating what he was going to do so that makes zero sense if so.

[–] Pete314 (2515) 3 years ago

You have to turn your brain off for EVERY zombie movie. Until you see zombies as a metaphor. Now making Las Vegas the epicenter drawing the attention of some greedy guys looking for some easy money is a nice new turn.

[–] Alex (1495) 3 years ago

Zombieland did it x100 better. I could turn my brain off and enjoy the ride.

Not in Army of the Dead, tho. They kept hammering me with the stupid till I broke.

[–] Goliard (1413) 3 years ago

Nah. Not for Romero's first two, nor for plenty of others. Definitely not to the extent of this one.

[–] RogueDemonHunter (2656) 3 years ago

Yeah. The safe cracking aspect was so bizzare. No one thought to ask why it needed cracking when it belonged to the guy who setup the mission...If I was that German guy, that would be my first question at the meeting.

[–] kungfulord (957) 3 years ago

The Coyote offered a tribute to the zombie for a free pass, this means she always do this, right? why the daugther of Dave Bautista din't suspect that was what happen with her friend? her friend looks like she would be the weakest person in any group she was in, if someone invite her maybe that was the real reason

That is what i tought in the moment i saw her sacrifying the guard

Besides she most be a criminal and not a trustful person if she have to sacrifice a person everytime she enter with a group of people, is not far fetched assume she should choose the weakest person in every group and offer it in sacrifice, so in every group is one person bring im with lies and wich only porpusse is been sacrifice so the rest can continue, Unless she has a private army of assholes and rapist at her disposal to sacrifice each time she needs to bring in a new group.

But looks like nobody in the team think of that and every body looks so focused in what of an asshole the guy is and completely forgotten what the whole sacrifice ritual thing imply

[–] UncleRuckis (2596) 3 years ago

And she basically scooped up the rapist guy as they were going in. So if he hadn't shown up or simply said no to her pathetic offer of 20 grand, what exactly was the plan? Sacrifice someone from team Bautista?