She lied to her sisters about vanquishing Cole, she wanted Cole to be apart of Piper's wedding, she stayed in the Underworld to "save" Cole when he didn't want to be saved which ultimately lead to Prue's death, and she chose to be queen of the Underworld in Season 4.
shareFor all his faults Cole was 100 per cent in love with Phoebe. Hard to just give that up.
shareShe hardly knew Cole when she decided not to vanquish him, so it's pretty awful she lied about that.
Wanting Cole to be part of the wedding was ridiculous, he wasn't family or even a real friend. She could've just invited him to the reception.
It's was absolutely selfish to go and save Cole instead of helping Prue and Piper to protect an innocent. Although Cole did make clear he wanted to be saved before turning evil and technically Phoebe stayed in the Underworld to save Piper.
Phoebe is pretty much a stupid, selfish slut; who sometimes is good, but most of the time, will either leap before she looks, or let her hormones think for her. I honestly don't know how she survived so long as a witch with all the stupid decisions she made.
shareClassic Beauty and the Beast syndrome. Women like to think they can change a man.
shareFrom a logical standpoint, it doesn't make sense. But then again, love isn't known to be logical. To put it simply, she wasn't thinking with her head. Her love for Cole blinded her into thinking she could change/save him and she refused to accept that she couldn't. She acted selfishly for sure, but (and I say this as someone who hates Phoebe) I think it's believable. I've seen lots of people put their romantic partner first, to the detriment of themselves and others.
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