first of all, it's not even in color.
and where's the widescreen, huh?
but more importantly, where's the CGI and 1,206 cuts-per-minute, shaky-cam cool stuff? and believe it or not, the audio is low-fidelity *mono* -- are you kidding me?
and how come it's not narrated by morgan freeman?
like i said, this movie is absolutely terrible... and it wasn't even post-converted into 3D.
I Like your comedian irony!
shareYou forgot to say that this movie is old !
shareHa ha...you forgot to complain about the lack of inspirational music throughout the film.
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Jim Hutton (1934-79) & Ellery Queen =
Okay, I've found what just might be my favorite post EVER in the history of movie message boards! whiskeyTango-06, you are amazing wherever you are!
Yes, I agree, where are all these essentials for the ultimate movie-viewing experience. The Asphalt Jungle is certainly lacking all of these. Blech. Horrible. ;)
Also, none of the males show their behinds, none of the females show their breasts, there are no pregnant moments
to allow for characters to navel-gaze. And the lousy dialogue! None of the characters fill every other word with "it's
like", and I was sooooo disappointed that nobody exclaimed "Awe-sum" every 27 seconds.
And we now have my 2nd favorite post in the history of movie message boards!
gbennet, this is superb stuff you bring up here, and so true. Isn't The Asphalt Jungle just horrible because it lacks these things? Talk about a missed opportunity! ;)
Let's also mention that The Asphalt Jungle is lacking a political/social "message" that the audience should remember far and above any plot event and character arc. It's because of oversights like this that the movie really suffers.
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Also, because it was filmed in 1950, it misses the very sad opportunity to not have an old Motown song glued
onto the soundtrack to "explain" how the characters are feeling.
don't encourage lazy trolling.
shareThe Morgan Freeman line had me LMAO.
That is the way many dolts think about films. They are missing out.
Too bad Clint Eastwood didn't remake this. What this film really needed was some excessively underexposed cinematography, a tinkly piano music soundtrack, stolid pacing, and boring camera set-ups.
shareAnd don't forget the gay subtext.
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