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Mary Richards was rather Selfish and NEVER Gave Men a Chance

posted 8 years ago by JaysonT
14 replies | jump to latest

Love this show, and am fond that it never required a single woman to "have to get married" at the end of the series, or even wind up with a guy.

However, rewatching the series- I always found Mary rather prudish. She just never really let her guard down. She always seemed to be "polite" to all her dates. She was never really sincere. Maybe towards the final season she tried to date that Joe guy, but other then that- even the most handsome and sophisticated men were given the cold shoulder by her. Why was Mary such a snob? Even to her friends, she never could just speak the truth to them. Everything had to be "tip-toed" around. Even in the 7th season when her character finally got more of a backbone, I never really thought Mary changed much. She just seemed content being alone, which is fine I guess- but why lead on so many guys?

Any thoughts on this? I actually think Mary was just as fake and phony as Phyllis- who many complained was the airhead. I think Sue Ann and Rhoda were much more blunt and up front about their personalities. Mary just came off fake. Thoughts on this?

[–] jayhn1111 8 years ago

Mary was just so caring that she had a hard time saying things that could hurt somebody's feelings. We saw her in a few relationships where she was hot for the guy and we've also seen her dump a few guys. She just wouldn't settle for anybody if she didn't feel it was the real thing. She seemed very real and genuine.

[–] tmaj48 8 years ago

Mary had a lot of dates over the years, but most of them were offscreen. She once tallied up all the dates she'd had since she started dating, and she came up
with 2,000! But since the show focused more on her professional, "daytime" life,
the more private aspects of her sex life (and yes, she did have one) weren't shown. Maybe this led to sometimes being thought prudish, or Sue Ann's snarky comments about how Georgette's having a baby in Mary's bedroom was "probably the most exciting thing that ever happened in there," but Mary didn't feel obligated to discuss her sex life with anyone not directly involved.

I'm not crying, you fool, I'm laughing!

Hewwo.

[–] Blueghost 8 years ago

I think she was written that way as an ego boost to help single or divorced women, a growing population at that time, deal with less than honorable single men as they went searching for companionship.

I honestly don't recall too much about the men shown as her love interests, but I do seem to get the impression that most of them were duds in one form or another, with a few exceptions.

[–] InherentlyYours 8 years ago

'I think she was written that way as an ego boost to help single or divorced women, a growing population at that time, deal with less than honorable single men as they went searching for companionship.'
---------------
Or maybe the show was not written, nor cared less, to help women's problems in society, but for sitcom-device. Too bad there were so many "less than honorable single women" then also. Actually, JasonT answered his own question. So single women are special and need that 'ego boost', but not men at that time.

[–] CarolTheDabbler (518) a year ago

So single women are special and need that 'ego boost', but not men at that time.

I don't think anyone has said that, or even thinks that. But this particular show was about a single woman. If it had been about a single man, it would have shown more of *his* need for an ego boost.

[–] jeremy3 8 years ago

She was a career woman, and her job was everything. She had many dates who always seemed to interfere with her reality.

[–] wylierichardson-966-922691 8 years ago

What might have been a chief factor in how Mary related to men is that the producers might have been intent on showing her as the proverbial 'good girl'. The best way to show Mary as sexually 'pure' - without casting any doubt on her sexual preference - was to let her date just often enough to make clear that she was straight, but not get too involved with any one man for too long. If the relationships ended early, then the sticky 'sexual' question - would Mary 'do the dirty deed' with this latest would-be boyfriend - was avoided altogether.

[–] [email protected] (5504) a year ago

Remember the episode when MARY runs into her old boyfriend Dan who was on his way to get a marriage license?

From the dialogue they share, it's apparent that Mary and Dan were pretty serious. Murray even says that when Dan went away, he "broke Mary's heart". I just take it as a given that we didn't get to see much of that side of Mary's life. She had some serious relationships, but they weren't the focus of the show.

[–] R_Kane (15828) a year ago

So, none of you is aware that Mary Tyler Moore is a famous sex addict?

[–] Otter (24464) a year ago

Did she ever bang any of them?

I don't remember any. Mostly I remember it being like real adult dating, where faint hopes are usually dashed in one evening.

[–] Jes' Sayin' (5974) a year ago

It was part of the attitude, the perspective of the character, that she should always be single and sort of miserable about it, but soldiers on anyway. That's where part of the humor and pathos of the show came from. So she could never really become part of a happy relationship. That would become a different show.

[–] Otter (24464) a year ago

Yeah, it was like "Frasier", where the relationships between the major characters are all based on the lead being single. At that point in his life, Frasier's primary relationships are with his father, brother, and producer, and at this point in Mary's life her primary relationships are with her co-workers and neighbors. If either one of them had become half of a couple, they would have stopped needing the major supporting cast.

So I suppose they could have had Mary get serious about someone in the final season, but I don't know how believable that would have been. Face it, Mary Richards didn't really need anyone and wasn't serious about coupling up, and neither were any of the men she dated. Her dates were just two people looking for a few pleasant evenings.

[–] Jes' Sayin' (5974) a year ago

Indeed. The contrast with MTM's character in The Dick Van Dyke Show is interesting.

[–] Otter (24464) a year ago

Interesting you should say that, because there isn't actually all that much contrast! The two characters have similar personalities and mannerisms, the real difference between them is the lifestyle they've chose.

Seriously, what is the difference between Mary Richards and Laura Petrie, other than the preferences they've had and the choices they've made?