best line ever


from the milky joe episode, when Howard asks if everyone would like to hear the song he wrote, Vince says:

"perhaps, later. perhaps...not...at all."

LOL. something about the delivery.


Richie: "Dad...you were never dying."
Royal: "But I'm gonna live!"

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I'm the sheriff of stationery village.

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Honestly, any quotes related to the die-hard crazy man/child in Nabu's group of Shaman friends.

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Agreed. Any quotes to do with Kirk's depravity make me chuckle

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From "The Hitcher"

while standing in front of a bear cage
Bob Fossil: That's because he's a communist. He doesn't understand the service industry. But what he doesn't get is, if carpet man don't dance, carpet man don't eat"

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No contest here! Nothing on the show makes me laugh more than:

"Wen i young, kitten and he in da bag and i make a man go and i FLAT HIM OUT! he go away and fly! TOPSHOP!"

See it here:

http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DxBkAPoM6uTM&h=uAQF85fId

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One of Howard's best wins:

Can you do fog?

I often ask people this when they're boasting, then usually follow it with "simmer down".

Also:

Spirit of Jazz: "... maybe you gots to do somethin for me. I gots needs too, ya know."

HM: "Whatst?"


Kodiak Jack: "Beautiful view, huh?"

HM: "Oh yeah, whenever I see a view like that I'm always aware of the terrifying insignificance of mankind, and yet at the same time the irrevocable connection that we all have with the universe."

Kodiak Jack: "Ya know what I think about? Allll the tiny animal penises all over."







0118 999 881 999 119 725... 3

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"Ya know what I think about? All the tiny animal penises all over." - I find this one doubly funny because I'm always being accused of knowing a disturbing amount about animal genitalia. I'm a zoologist, and when you study animals you naturally study their mating habits, so you do tend to learn some pretty odd things about animals' naughty bits. When I inform people of some of these (not just out of the blue, I only do it when it's relevant!), I often get looked at like I'm a maniac - people seem to assume I just go around staring at animal penises all day.

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Haha. In that case, did you appreciate the bit about the mating habits in Ricky Gervais' stand-up special, Animals?




OCJOC

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I only vaguely remember it - I recall some film of lions being shown with Ricky talking over it, saying something like: "What a slag, she don't even know him!" when a lioness approaches a male.

I do remember Ricky spouting utter nonsense regarding daddy-long-legs being highly venomous but having no teeth. This is a complete myth.

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Too many to choose, but from the Tundra episode:

Vince - "It takes about 90 mink to make a small lady's glove".
Howard - "That's cos they're really crap at sowing".

Genius.

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...and that's why I don't like Cricket.

One of my favourite lines there...but is it really my favourite?!

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Old greg,he's like a fish finger but really big,like a garage.Imagine that fish finger when you can see its as big as a garage.

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"Wanna come to a club where people wee on each other?" - Old Gregg.

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