In the diner, as the cook brings Melvin White and Kent Lane their food out...
Melvin: (to the cook) Hey Buddy, Your thumb is in my soup!
Cook: Yeah, it's infected. The doctor told me I should keep it warm so It'll heal quicker.
Kent: Well, why don't you take your thumb and shove it up your ass then?
Cook: Oh, I do that when I'm back in the kitchen.
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~ Daniel ~
the big dude in jail
"just because I killed myself a pervert,a degenerate-i killed 3 more before they caught me.i took a 3 lbs chicken & I sholved it in his jaw-when I get outta here i'm gonna do SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING!!!!"
"aw *beep* got me a wallet-hey tyrone!"
"There's a full moon out tonight."
shareradio dispatch:"travestite disturbing the peace"
melvin & kent go there & shoot him. lol.
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fried ice cream is a reality
That's the scene and line I remember the most...friggin hilarious! I seem to recall that a lot of the dialogue was just straight out of a Blanche Knott joke book from the 80's - this one and "Do It Till I Need Glasses" which was equally as funny.
sharebartender:"it was the jokes he told."
kent:"like what?"
bartender:"how do you get a witch pregnant?"
kent:"how do you get a witch pregnant?"
bartender:"you *beep* her."
melvin:"that's not funny."
bartender:"I know."
& the way the bartender is crying.
& he says tuesday night is his best night because choir rehersal let's out at the church next door. lol
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bah bumbug
Cop 1 - Cop 2 'Always marry an ugly woman, because a good looking woman will always leave you...'
Cop2 - Cop 1 'Yeah but an ugly woman could leave you too...'
Cop 1 - Cop 2 'True, but who gives a *beep*
The next sentence is the truth. The sentence before this is a lie.
"we won't have any of that crap t'night! Crap t'night!"
"What's wrong Sue... Perman?"
"Those words are making me weak."
If Mad Magazine was translated to the screen corrctly, it would be like "Night Patrol", zany and fun!
If you love and support Michael Jackson 100%, copy & paste this into your signature. We love MJ!
Something like, "Ya know that really hot girl who works on our floor? Well, I was with her last night and I really fvcked her brains out."
Woman then passes through frame like a freak-tard going "UHGH UGHGHH GUUGHHG UGHGHGH GUIGHHGUUGHGH!!!!"