my two favorite are-
allan: I wonder if she ever had an orgasm in the two years we were married, or did she fake it that night?
Allan: What are you doing this Saturday?
Woman: Committing suicide.
Allan: what about Friday?
so hilarious, woody allen is such a great actor/filmmaker
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"It restates the negativeness of the universe, the hideous lonely emptiness of existence. Nothingness, the predicament of man forced to live in a barren godless eternity like a tiny flame flickering in an immense void with nothing but waste, horror and degradation forming a useless bleak straightjacket in a black absurd cosmos."
"What are you doing Saturday night?"
"Committing suicide."
"What about Friday?"
^^I actually stood behind a couple people in line at a coffee shop the other day who were quoting this. It made me so happy!
"I wonder if she actually had an orgasm in the two years we were married, or did she fake it that night?"
"I'm so excited, I think I'll brush all my teeth today!"
Edith Head gives great costume.
My favorite line is the aforementioned art museum exchange between Woody and the depressed, goth-looking chick, but I also love:
Linda: 'Alan, is that you? How'd it go tonight?'
Alan: 'I got in a fight with some bikers.'
Linda: 'A fight!? Oh Alan, are you alright?'
Alan: 'Oh sure. I brought my chin down on one guy's knee, and smashed another
guy on the fist with my nose.'
Wheres Julie?
She ran off with the leader, they're heading for Mexico now. It never would have worked between Julie and me cause she's protestant and I'm catholic and it would have been a great religious abyss between us..
"Do I go with Oscar Peterson or Bartok String Quartet No. 5?"
Because they're just so similar. Ha ha. His little dj hut is something.
'oh my God, what have I done? I'm a savage jungle beast!'
share"You have the most eyes I've ever seen on a person!"
Born when she kissed me, died when she left me, lived whilst she loved me
If you need me I'll no longer be at 555-739-8217. I will be at 555-263-9591.
(prescient! we're always available!)
The whole fantasy in Allan's head where he and Dick are speaking proper refined highbrow English about Allan and Linda running off together and Dick saying that it's okay because he (Dick) only has two months to live.
Mere words do not do this scene much justice though, so go watch it. Now.
"I will not go down in history as the greatest mass-murderer since Adolf Hitler!" - Merkin Muffley
Linda: "I love dick".