TV fans actually LIKE this?!!
I've seen endless bitching, pissing and moaning about Burton's film, and I'm the first to admit that Burton took a lot of missteps, but I liked that film enough to prod me to finally go back and watch the original series. It was frustrating how they'd drag stories out to the point of tedium on a day-to-day basis, but overall it's a great show with loveable characters. So I finally got around to watching House of Dark Shadows... and wow, is it NOT the same thing! I could see how "House of" could've gotten someone into the TV show, but not the other way around.
The story was too drawn-out on TV, but it's too condensed here - and it frequently feels like footage was chopped out. The characters are all cardboard imitations of their TV personas and most are inconsequential to the story (Willie Loomis fares best, since he has a bit of a character arc); Barnabas was transformed from an intriguing, lovelorn reluctant vampire into an outright villain; Carolyn's only purpose was to play the victim and David serves virtually no purpose at all (the time they wasted with him hiding could've been put to better use by including Barnabas's sister); there was neither time nor any on-screen indication that Julia was "in love with Barnabas;" and too many people die gruesome deaths. As far as horror movies go, it was aesthetically pleasing, well acted and competently directed, but the tone was way too dark and they tried to pack too much story and too many characters into the script - which thoroughly lacked the stagy nuances of the show's dialogue.
After enduring this horrible Hammer-wannabe hit, I no longer feel any shame in liking Burton's corny dramedy. Compared to THIS film, at least it was unpretentious.