31 (2016) aka 31 reasons not to cast your wife in literally every film you make

SPOILERS FOR THIS FILM THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE NUMBER 31


-a film by the guy that brought you house of 1000 corpses

-and the devils rejects

-brings you a film called 31

-so this film is about some gang of weirdos

-who travel in a van doing god knows what

-and i thought these dirty fucks were the bad guys

-but then they meet some really bad guys

-dressed as clowns

-and they meet the clown leader

-and he's like all british and stuff

-and he's like omg u have 12 hours to survive in my game

-and the weirdos are like wtf is this game bruv

-and british man is like u have to survive for 12 hours

-and they are like we know that bruv but whats the point of this game

-and hes like all british and evil and stuff

-self explanatory really

-so the weirdos wake up in some encampment

-and they are being chased by some midget dressed like hitler

-this film is directed by a man who legally goes by the name zombie btw

-so this little fuck is chasing them and stuff

-and then more baddies dressed like clowns come along

-so our weirdos are like freaking out and trying to survive

-and there's some super skilled clown man at the end

-and he's like pure evil y'know

-so yeah thats it really

-its not as good as house of 1000 rejects

-but its alright i suppose

-probably better than la la land

-6.5/10