MovieChat Forums > Moms' Night Out (2014) Discussion > Stay at home moms = easy

Stay at home moms = easy

posted 10 years ago by NerdLife
23 replies | jump to latest

A Day In The Life

Wifey and the husband wake up at 6:00am and she starts to get herself prepared for the day. Then, she?ll get the kids up at 7:00 or so and see them and the hubby out the door by 8:30. What?s next? There?s an entire day of freedom from the little munchkins! She?ll go home, clean and tidy the house. It?s not even 10:00. She?ll go to the gym for an hour then head to lunch with girlfriends?maybe go shopping with them, or pick up a few groceries. She?ll pick the kiddos up at 3:00pm, then go home and ?supervise? while watching whatever current garbage is on the HGTV network. At 5:00, she?ll start preparing dinner (if she bothers to cook). The husband comes home, and by 7:00 she checks out for the night as he does the dishes and helps the kids with homework. Maybe she reads them a story for an hour. Have sex at 10pm (oops, I forgot this was a marriage, so cross that off). Asleep by 11:00.

Please note, this is applicable to parents with school-age and above children. A toddler is a different ballgame, I would imagine.

These are very real stories that I?ve heard rehashed numerous times by some of my own family members and the wives of my co-workers. While they?ll never shut up about how mentally exhausting it is be a stay at home mom, and how they never get to sit down, it?s ridiculous that they think their life is somehow more stressful, or that they work harder than their husbands that deal with rush hour commutes, nagging bosses, deadlines, and the other pitfalls of a 9-5 career.

My mom stayed home and cared for my sister and I until we were both in middle school. She did things right: we had hot meals six nights a week, my dad read the paper after dinner (rarely doing dishes), and she did all the housework except for the manly stuff like mowing the lawn and changing the oil. She did not spend hours on Facebook or at lunch gossiping with girlfriends. On top of that, if asked, she always said without hesitation, ?Dad works much harder and endures much more stress than I do. I?m very lucky to be able to stay home.?

That is the attitude a stay at home mom should have.

Do The Math

Total hours ?worked? in her eyes = 6am ? 11pm = 17 hours

In reality:

4 hours for getting the kids ready and then cleaning up/tidying
1 hour shopping for groceries
1 hour entertaining the kids in the afternoon
2 hours preparing a meal and then cleaning up
Once that?s all added up it?s only eight hours, and I?m being generous with that. Meanwhile, the husbands leave the house by 8:00, sit in traffic for an hour, get a measly one hour lunch, and sit in traffic for another hour to get home. Once home, they then have to clean up (because after all, she did the cooking) and then help the kids with their math homework because mom never studied anything that actually made her think, and therefore cannot help with math.

The most disgusting part about this to me is that I hear my these stay at home moms bragging about this to no end. Yet, they still hamsterize that they are somehow working harder and longer than their husbands. They also never acknowledge that the stress of the full-time workforce is far more intense than being a stay at home mom. While their husband is being chewed out by his boss, their biggest worry of the day is not burning the lasagna (assuming they can cook)

Stay at home moms have the easiest job of all. Stop complaining moms!

[–] mistyw_ktown 10 years ago

So much of this post is wrong, I'm really at loss as to where to start.....
It's amazing to me how little respect you have for your mom, to say that what she did with you, staying home and raising you...siblings, if you have any...... Is so easy. So easy in fact, that you get online to criticize other women who do it.

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that you are not married and have : 1) had any responsibility except yourself 2) have no friends with children.

You ever done laundry/cooked an entire meal for 4 people?? You think you can start dinner at 5?? Please. Kids have AT LEAST 2 hours of homework a night. Dinner needs to be served and over by 5:45. That puts them homework by 6, so that by 8 they can start showers and bedtime routines (older kids much easier, but need to be early nonetheless cause teens need 8 hrs sleep too)
Cleaning??? You think you can clean an entire house that 4 or 5 people live in... In an hour? You have your wife done by 10, that's not gonna happen.... No. See, there's all these breakfast dishes you forgot about. That's what you cooked everything in and the plates, utensils, glasses for each person. If you're lucky and have a dishwasher, you can load up all but the pots and pans....but hey, when you get home from taking the kids to school and before you start cleaning...you can do those dishes. Now, after 8 loads of laundry (because 4 people go through a lot of clothes, like you wouldn't believe) then put them away....and then it's time to go back to the bathroom upstairs and finish cleaning the bathroom of your 12yr old son, who has stuffed all these crunchy socks underneath the sink AGAIN.....and you can't even talk about your daughter's room.....
So, now we have laundry done, and cleaned the house....and now it's 2:30. School is out at 3, but you have to wait in line and the later you are, the further back you have to go. But today, today you have to wait for your kid to get done with his extra curricular activities and you have meet with head of that to get the packets of stuff that you've gotta sell now, and learn all about that. So, now it's almost 5 when you get home. Dinner time!! That's an hour or more. Done with that....but it's time to do the dishes....then help with homework. Ok, now. Dinner, done. Homework, done. Cleaning.... Still not done, but your son only has one sock in the laundry basket, but save that till later. It's time to fight with the kids about getting off the phone/computer and make sure they get into bed and get some sleep....it's late enough as it is.
It's at least 10 by this time...BUT, that science project isn't gonna do itself ... So you gotta get cracking on part of it tonight, cause your son needed help, but between baseball and Boy Scouts, he's so busy....you have to help him out. But wait!!! You gotta get lunches ready for the kids tomorrow, AND get what you can ready to cook breakfast, cause tomorrow is your daughters first day of soccer and she'll need a good breakfast.
So, after you get done with that... It's well past 11. Hubby needs a special shirt and special tie for tomorrow. He told you before, but you forgot....it's ok, you'll get it done for him, so you gotta iron that shirt and steam out the tie. That takes about 20-25 mins.... At least. That's done. Wait!!! You forget to make sure your daughter's soccer outfit was ready to go for tomorrow, but that dang stain WILL NOT come out and you spend 20 mins scrubbing that grass stain out! It's well after midnight at this point, but finally you can get in the bed, and you've got to get up by 6....cause breakfast doesn't cook itself!!

I don't see any time for lunching/shopping in this day. In fact, I didnt see any time that the mom was watching tv, getting online, talking to her friends..... Nope. None of that easy stuff. Men have it hard at work. Women that work, they have it hard too. A stay at home mom.....she has it hard too.
Is every day like this? No. Are a lot? Yes.

What you are failing to realize is this, your own mom sacrificed so much that you don't even know about, and never will. A mom's job is 24/7. No off days , no sick days. Her job is NEVER EVER done, and it is NEVER EVER easy.

[–] 10 years ago

[deleted]

[–] gallifreyent 7 years ago

We lived in a major city then moved to a small town in a rural area. We had a family business where Dad worked long hours every day. Mom stopped working outside the family after they got married. Both parents were volunteer Scout leaders, very active in church (he was a deacon, she was the treasurer, and both taught Sunday school and helped anywhere else they could), both were active with PTA, and both helped us kids with extracurricular projects and hobbies as needed. Mom didn't work at the biz, but she ran errands for it fairly often, mostly picking up supplies not available locally. We kept a large food garden that all of us enjoyed maintaining all year, and we canned and froze and shared with the food pantry. Both were very good at creating and making things, as well as passing the skills on to us. I can't knit or crochet, but I can build a small shed, wire it, and house chickens in it. Mom didn't go to a gym or socialize outside all the community work I've mentioned. She did drive the kids and friends to meetings and school. Our house was clean and comfy and pretty, mostly because of the work she did to make it so, and partly because we kids did our part to keep it that way because we were taught the necessary skills.

My parents were typical. My friends' moms (including one widow) included some who worked full or part time outside the family, as well as those who worked on their family farms and in family businesses. The ones who did not work elsewhere did the same kinds of community volunteer work as my mom. You know, somebody has to to those things. Some of my friends made it through college without loans, scholarships, or any other funds except what they earned, and while being a mom.

I decided early that I am not suited to motherhood, so I have no personal experience in that area, but I have the greatest admiration for parents who are involved in their kids' lives, and I want to believe that is most parents. At least, it's most of the parents I've ever known. The ones who let other people raise the kids, whether it's through Children's Services or the nannies working for very wealthy parents, might find staying at home "easy," but that's not the majority of moms.

~If you go through enough doors, sooner or later you're gonna find a dog on the other side.~🐕

[–] vjpb 10 years ago

I have a Facebook friend who is a stay at home mom and posts constantly on Facebook. Once in a while she'll "share" the classic "I'm a stay at home mom, go ahead, ask what I do all day" stupidity. I think by the 15th post of the day, it's pretty clear what you do all day.

[–] jmattice-2 10 years ago

You're a complete chauvinist.

[–] 10 years ago

[deleted]

[–] lizswann12 10 years ago

It is immensely more difficult then I ever thought it would be. My daughter JUST started school and it's still crazy hectic. I live in a house with my daughter, myself, my disabled mother and a truck driver father who is home every other day. Between cleaning up after everybody, preparing and cooking meals for everyone, meeting with my daughter's teacher to discuss her adjustment to school, looking after two dogs and a cat as well as run all the household errands, it is insane for the OP to think it is so easy. I agree with the second poster. Clearly the OP is single

[–] russwjohns 10 years ago

And you fail to comment on the lengthy diatribe by the OP.

[–] russwjohns 10 years ago

Sorry... but you sure don't sound like a parent or even a close relative of a family with small children. This movie is a COMEDY and not a discourse on modern life.

"husbands that deal with rush hour commutes, nagging bosses, deadlines, and the other pitfalls of a 9-5 career." Boo hoo for poor little you and your dissonant thoughts on marriage. Sadly, economic hardships required both spouse to work outside the home today.

[–] istolethemustard 10 years ago

BahahahahHhBahahahahahhahaHhHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I've never flown a plane and I don't know anything about flying a plane and I have no intention of flying a plane because my understanding and expectations of planes and pilot life is so out of sync with reality that no airline would ever hire me, but let me just say FLYING A PLANE IS SO FREAKING EASY. All you other pilots that talk about the complexities and intricacies if knowing the cockpit and gauging flight patterns and runway distances you're all liars, it's so easy. Don't you see those pilots on Facebook, if it's so hard why do they have time to be on Facebook?? I'm actually flying the plane right now as I post.

Like, totally duh bro.

[–] jmattice-2 10 years ago

Awesome reply!

[–] A_l_a_c_h_u_a_1 10 years ago

Yeah, I got sick of the lead mom in this movie being so self-centered and whiny and unable to handle her kids. All the while whining and complaining how hard it is being a mom to three kids. You know what's harder than being a stay at home mom of three kids? Being a WORKING mother of three kids.

I can't stand when stay a home moms bitch and moan. They don't have to get up at 5:00 in the morning in the freezing cold, spend 45 minutes defrosting and scraping off their car from ice, then have to drive through heavy congested traffic for an hour and work a full day, then drive home in rush hour again and have to continue their job by picking up the kids, taking care of them, making them dinner, getting them baths, putting them to bed, etc. - and then have to wake up a few more hours later at 5:00am again to do the same thing all over again. No, they get to sit in their comfy sweats all day and lounge around and watch tv and nap - all the while complaining how "hard" it is to be a stay at home mom.

I remember this article I read from this stay at home mom a few years ago, and she was saying her favorite part of the day was when she and her daughter would sit on their couch every morning in the their pajamas and watch the Today Show with Kathy and Hoda. Yes - being a stay at home mom is so rough!

[–] IamNoOneYouKnow 9 years ago

So someone cares for your kid all day for you and then you or your husband pick them up and take care of them together for a couple of hours before bed. How is that so infinitely more tough than providing childcare all day and then doing the same exact stuff in the evenings? If you have a seriously stressful and demanding job then yes, having kids would compound that and being a stay at home parent would be easier. Most working dads I know are not having a hard time taking care of their kids and house. Working moms need to make working dads pull their weight. You really think taking care of multiple kids means you sit around in pajamas napping? I hope your daycare provider or nanny doesn't know this.