isn't that a little bit hypocritical? I don't get it, a lot of women use toys and this is even encouraged by others in society, it is not seen as cheating or anything(a woman having sex with a plastic penis is seen as okay.)
But a guy watching porn is cheating? what kind of logic is that?
Imagine if more guys everywhere were buying female anatomically correct toys to masturbate.... the kind of hell society would raise over this.
isn't that hypocritical?
I'm not sure that the kind of women who hate porn have vibrators
sharekind of reminds me of the 50 shades book, but porn is still a problem somehow
share50 shades is erotic only because that guy's a billionaire. If he weren't it would be considered as horror novel.
shareROFL
shareBrilliant. Spot on, mate. If he was an oil man at Jiffy Lube...no movie!
https://s3.amazonaws.com/barkpost-assets/50+GIFs/45.gif
Not true.
shareNot hypocritical, it's a "double-standard" men have to accept about women. It's all about give to get.
Give up one thing she hates so you can enjoy all of the rest.
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that's pretty much how i see it. If porn is bad and guys need to stop watching it, shouldn't the girlfriend get rid of her toys as well? I mean think about it, a guy just uses his eyes for the "cheating" the girl would actually be doing it with the toy.
shareJeez, that's not the point of porn, nor of vibrators. They don't equal each other.
One makes women seem like they have no brains (and there are plenty of messages in the culture that already say that) and all have gorgeous bodies (definitely not true in any culture).
The other is a substitute for what men have. It gets right to the point and doesn't mess around with any interpersonal interaction. But you would never come away from an experience with a vibrator and think, 'Just wait - someday I will meet the man of my dreams and he will reveal himself to have batteries in his private parts!) There's a reality check from the time you turn it on until the time you turn off a vibrator!
When a female uses a vibrator (a penis does not vibrate, I won't even go in to that) it's a substitute of what she does not have. So to use a vibrator after she had sex with her boyfriend or husband while he is at work or whatever is exactly the same thing as watching porn for a man, a man's toy is the porn. Talk about double standards again, they always seem to be justified for women.
shareNot the same. Pornography provides a source of arousal whereas a vibrator is a mechanical masturbation aid. The analogous aid for a man would be a, so-called, “pocket pussy” (PP). As OP correctly points out, PPs are stigmatized to a much greater degree in society than either vibrators or dildos. Not sure why.
shareThe movie was not saying that porn was bad. Jon (accurately) argued that every guy watches porn, his friend agreed, and Esther (I suppose she could be seen as the film's sexual voice of reason) also agreed, and even offered him some porn.
The argument in the movie was that Jon's approach to porn was unhealthy, which is true.
Same type of arguments could be made about alcohol: alcohol is not a bad thing, but some people have unhealthy relationships with it.
It sounds like the people on this thread...I'm going to assume they are men...have the sense that women in general think that porn is bad.
First of all, yes, some women think that, and it's unfortunate. Just as some men think that women who enjoy sex are sluts. Screw those people, they suck.
Secondly, many of us women recognize that all men watch porn sometimes, and we are okay with that. Some of us even like being a part of it with our guys.
Third, in my personal opinion, the concept of porn is not bad, and I think that porn should continue to be available and used. However. The current mainstream style of porn is in fact problematic. Far too much of it does exactly what this movie says: it removes the idea that your sexual partner is a human being with needs and a personality and whatnot, and that has led to (and research backs this up) strained sexual interactions between men and women. In addition, not enough porn is made for women. We should have porn too.
Or wait, sorry, tl;dr? Dudebros, haven't you ever had a conversation with an actual woman?
To answer the title of your OP more than the post itself, porn comes with connotations of Peeping Tom-ism and perhaps even enjoying the debasement of others. Sex toys (with the exception of sex dolls) are "person- neutral." They don't objectify the other gender.
I also can't help noticing your juxtaposition of "plastic penis" on the one hand, with "female anatomically correct toy" on the other. Assuming you had in mind a sex doll, among other things, do you think a plastic penis is fully equivalent to a sex doll in terms of, say, moral or social repercussions?
I don't see the two things are parallel. A vibrator is a device meant to facilitate masturbation. It doesn't provide fantasy images, and I doubt women think of it as a "substitute penis" - it just makes the job easier. If there's no vibrator available, a woman will use her hand. Is her hand also a parallel for porn, just like the vibrator? But the man watching porn is also using his hand to masturbate. If he doesn't have porn available, he can still masturbate, just like the woman can. There's no real equation between the two things.
A few women object to their boyfriends or husbands watching porn because they consider it "cheating," but I think most object for other reasons. Watching porn isn't just watching sex, it's watching something that (in the opinion of many) tends to insult and demean women in a sexual context. I don't think plastic vibrating eggs demean men. It's just not the same thing.
This is an entirely different subject, but I think a closer parallel (and the one the movie briefly identified) is the one between Jon's porn and Barbara Sugarman's attachment to romance fiction. Both give unrealistic images of male-female interactions. Both, in the cases of Jon and Barbara, have become a substitute for real life relationships, because they're "better than" the real thing. Both have caused these two people to be dismissive and evasive with real partners because they don't live up to the fantasy images in their chosen escape fiction. Both have helped ruin them for any satisfying long term relationship with a man or woman. And for the purposes of your argument, porn is more popular with men and romance with women; and it's probably a common idea that porn is bad but romance fiction is okay. Porn vs romance fiction makes a much better comparison, I think.
Tell me the truth. Are we still in the game?
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Vibrators do demean men, saying they don't, is absolutely retarded.
Jin_Hayase is a man on a fake profile, ran by Chasemarc1701. BE WARNED.
I agree with your parallel of the romance novel to porn. I don't agree however with your view point of porn being degrading to women; well in other words, I just don't think it's that simple. There is porn that is geared toward degrading people, women and men alike. The people who enjoy these kinds of activities in or outside of porn also vary in gender. I know quite a few women who like being degraded, I also know a man who likes being degraded. I think it is almost taboo to talk about the inherent power roles that affect sex in this day and age of gender equality. Of course I bring this up because being degraded largely involves a power dynamic.
I personally am not into watching porn that is degrading, but some of the stuff I have come across that is super degrading is done by women who loooove what it is that they are doing. I can see a woman's objections to this type of thing, but not nearly all porn is degrading.
Getting off watching other people f.ck vs getting off with an inanimate object. Hmmm...
Can't you tell the difference?
yeah, you are using a phallic object to actually have sex with.
completely replacing the "male member" to do the sexual act... probably fantasizing about another man. literally having sex with it
about watching people do it, so watching regular movies that have sex scenes in them is cheating as well? like some guy is cheating by watching this movie? cheating with scarlett?
Comparing porn to a movie with a sex scene in it... Man, you really suck at analogies.
shareno, the comparison was not the porn to the movie with a sex scene in itself,
the comparison was a guy playing with himself to porn... to comparing a guy playing with himself to a sex scene from a movie.....
according to the women saying porn is cheating... wouldn't doing that to a sex scene in a movie be just as bad?
i mean, the guy is still fantasizing and seeing a nude woman having intercourse.
The movie might not be as graphic, might only show her bobs, but wouldn't it count?
the worst thing about it, is that married women that have toys.... are literally, having sex with a plastic male member instead of being with their real husbands (or boyfriends)
but.. yeah, looking at a video on a screen is so much worse than that... right 😋
i do love how you choose to ignore this point though, that was nice. says a lot about you
Maybe it's because they are terrible at sex. Like you seem to be, seeing how much butthurt you are.
Anyway, that's my last word on it. If you don't see people replying to you after days have passed maybe its because they have moved on and worry about more important things. Either that or you are on their ignore list. Like I'm about to put you on ;)
You really are pathetic and childish fede. You clearly have some serious issues with men. Using the same logic you are using I would conclude that you are terrible at sex, and very likely not particularly attractive, hence the anger towards men.
I would actually agree with some of the other posters in this thread that romance novels are a better comparison.