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How Splice Nearly Got Me Banned From My Local Theater

posted 14 years ago by flish553
286 replies | jump to latest

I don't want to ruin this movie for anyone, so if you haven't seen it, please don't read any further.

Alright, let's start with the previews. When previews for Splice hit the airwaves, it was promoted as a sci-fi/horror film about scientists who create a new life form, which the clever writers called "science's newest miracle (is) a mistake." After seeing a handful of trailers, I must admit I was intrigued. Maybe this was going to be like Species with more of a plot or character development to it. Unfortunately, I was wrong.
The actors aside (both of whom I adored in other films, Polley in the Dawn of the Dead remake and Brody as the mentally handicapped guy in The Village), I felt a bit awkward when Dren watched the two protagonists have sex on a filthy labratory couch. Then I had trouble getting past the weird feeling in my gut when Adrian Brodie taught Dren how to dance and she was OBVIOUSLY attracted to him. Also, when his dumb-ass decided it was alright to have sex with this creature (not a clone of his girlfriend, a mixture of animals and humans, so a THING), I had to fight the urge to get up and leave the theater. And finally, during the last twenty minutes of the film, when Dren becomes a male and visciously rapes Sarah Polley's character, I decided I wanted my money back.

As I said, I do not blame any of the actors for this movie's faults. I'd just like to know who the hell saw this schlock-fest and thought it was a decent film. I also read something about the DVD release should have alternate endings. Like what? Dren turns back into a female and rapes Andrien Brody? Come on, how on Earth could anyone want to see this disturbing film again?
After it was FINALLY over (and my girlfriend was nearly sick from the rape scene), we headed for the nearby exit. I couldn't stand the feeling I had in my stomach about what I'd just seen and felt I had to say something. I found one of the girls working the concession stand and politely asked her to locate the manager for me. After a minute, a large man in a nice suit walked up and shook my hand, introducing himself as the manager. I explained to him that I did not enjoy the film but I was not going to demand a refund. I simply wanted to know how the hell this movie got the semi-decent ratings it did and how he felt about it? Apparently I said something wrong because the big guy in the nice suit turned bright red and said, "If you'd rather not come back to this theater, you can continue talking about this movie. Otherwise, please refrain from libling a decent film."
By the way, lible is printed, slander is spoken. Dumb-ass.

Basically, I'd just like to know what happened to the science-fiction (or in this case, somewhat science-fact) movies that used to frightening yet not sickening. Something has gone seriously wrong with our mentality as a nation if we feel it's alright to make movies about creating life, then killing it, then getting raped by it, then killing it again. What does anyone learn from watching this kind of movie?
How NOT to make a movie.

[–] resident_joe 14 years ago

really? first of all why in the world would you waste his time with that stuff? ok so lets say you tell him and he didnt get angry then what? you guys are gonna hold hands and hop around i mean seriously and if you were just looking at it and thinking its all pointless not getting the point out of it then yes it will just seem like an aquared pointless disturbing rape/sex..... duh... the creature obviously saw the end of its life coming(because it ages fast if you were listening you would have known that but i doubt you were) it wanted to keep its speicies going...oh and if you didnt know at that scene that phrase that the creature says at the end sounds kinda like hes chokeing on somthing ya well what he says is inside you and obviously if you have a dirty mind youll think he is saying something totaly disgusting when its suppose to mean like i dont want to be the last of my species ... what a better candidate then the only fricking female within the area... anyways stop posting lil whinny posts in hopes that we will feel bad that you had a sick feeling in your stomach after watching it cause... WE DONT CARE

[–] xHorrorDudex 14 years ago

It says "If you enjoyed this title, our database also recommends:" "Watchmen" so it must be good :)

[–] auntie_vals_vaginal_douche 14 years ago

dont think he was being serious... saw some irony in the OP.;/-()*

natural po-lice...

[–] 14 years ago

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[–] KillerInc 14 years ago

I'd of snapped at you too. Managers have better things to do than listen (sounds like you were shouting at him) to a tool who didnt like a movie they just saw.

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I do believe in you... I just know you are going to fail.

[–] 14 years ago

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[–] jroh87 14 years ago

you must be one of those people who'll be convinced of anything they read.

[–] Greenzombidog 14 years ago

I think maybe you missed the point. The movie succeded as it got an emotional response from you. I too felt uncomfortable at some of the seens you mentioned but I didn't think that made it a bad movie. In fact I think it made it a good movie.
So many times these days I leave the cinema feeling nothing. It's quite an achievement for a film to elicit an emotional response from me. It's the job of cinema and any other art form to raise an emotional response and get you thinking, the fact that you took offence to this surprises me. I don't know what you expect when you see a movie maybe you should stick to romcoms in the future.

[–] trollomatic 14 years ago

I thought this was terrible movie.

[–] Top_Gun123 14 years ago

Agree - Terrible.

[–] kelly-rhodes1 14 years ago

i have just read your feedback to Splice. i wanted to see predator tonight and it wasnt showing, my friend suggested splice, i read a quick bio and thought sounds wierd ideal! i was in for a shock i admit. however despite the disturbing peek into genetic research and the morality issues it brings up, i dont undertsnad how some one can take such personal offence to a film?? it wasnt made and produced to offend YOU, if you dont like a book to you go back to the book shop and complain to the owner? if you dont like a record do you complain to the distrubuter? no you dont.

i think the beauty of this film, and yes you read correctly, beauty is that it goes to those dark disgusting places where people rarely tread, its disgusting and cringeworthy and in places not exactly warm and fuzzy, your picking holes in characters, these characters are based on people, humans, we all make mistakes and we all make bad choices (dont get me wrong im not condoning having sex with a human/bird/amphibious hybrib) im not, what im saying is are you perfect? no, so how can characters in films be? and to be fair i have seen a lot of films, im talking thousands and seen some really wierd stuff, because i like to expose my self to the media of film, i didnt think the rape scene was remotely graphic, the disturbing element was the fact that it was a human/bird/amphibious hybrid, i sat in the cinema with people verbally shocked, but what a great thing!!! people actually chose to see something completely off the wall, which disturbed them and hopefully raises serious questions about genetic research. certain things just shouldnt be done, but i think taking such a personal affront to a film, which is clearly designed to shock and disgust and get the old grey matter working is a waste of time. so no, Splice didnt nearly get you banned from the theatre, you did.

[–] brzeczyk 14 years ago

> Something has gone seriously wrong with our mentality as a nation if
> we feel it's alright to make movies about creating life, then killing
> it, then getting raped by it, then killing it again.

I'm not sure what "nation" are you referring to as "ours", but I presume you're U.S. American. Splice is a Canadian-French co-production. In many countries outside of the U.S., people have actually learned quite a lot from this movie. Which was quite decent, though it sure could have been better.

The movie actually reminded me of Wolfgang Petersen's Enemy Mine (1985). Good sci-fi that goes beyond the typical Star Trek b.s.

[–] white_fire4 14 years ago

This should be titled "How my dumb ass almost got me banned from the movies"

You're correcting the manager on what's lible and what's slander, and yet you were wanting to demand a refund for getting what you paid for.

The theaters do not control the content of movies, they have no say in them, they have no deciding process in what gets shown. For that, you would want the central headquarters of said movie theater chain.

The people that actually work there, do just that....work there. That's it. YOU pay to see the MOVIE. There is no guarantee you'll like it, that it will be good, any of that. All they guarantee is that the picture will be good, sound will be good, and that the snacks they charge you 200% for are somewhat fresh (but no guarantee they're good either)

Theaters will not refund you money just because you didn't like the movie. That's your responsibility, to find out about movies, and to make informed choices about what you want to see. And if you make a wrong choice, that's ON YOU.

Dumb ass.

[–] 14 years ago

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[–] keithbalbi 14 years ago

This has always fascinated me, people who want to go see a horror film and then complain coz it was disturbing. By definition alone a true horror film should not be enjoyable - it should make you feel scared, it should make you feel disturbed.

Yet when a horror film actually achieves this people complain. People have lost touch with what an actual horror film is, they think horror should be cheesey and 'safe' and fun. I wouldn't consider hardly any films that get classed as horror to be true horror. Crap like Friday the 13th, Nightmare on Elm street aren't scry, they are silly, badly acted and try to entertain you with their violence - if a horror film is trying to entertain you then by definition it's not really a horror film.

I'm assuming it will be mostly Hollywood fed people who will complain about this film, coz they are so used to living in their safe and comfortable world of cheesy Hollywood movies that they can't handle a horrific film.

I havn't seen Splice yet, but I just don't understand people who complain when a horror films actually achieves what it's supposed to. True horrors are supposed to make you feel sick and disturbed, not give you a fun ride through your comfort zone.I agree with you though that a film doesn't need to have sick gore in it to be frightening, but all the same it achieved what it set out to do if it repulsed you.

And as for complaining to the manager, you chose to see the film, you could have researched it before going to see it, it's all on you whether you go to see a movie or not. Everybody is in the same boat, until you go watch a film at the cinema you won't know if you will like it or not, that's the chance you take and entirely your responsibility. He shouldn't have been so rude though.