girls like nora dont date guys like nick

jdubhua, do you think maybe your own self-esteem went down the toilet and girls can see that? And that's why you can't get a nice girl? Or maybe the girls you used to date were superficial and you are still going after superficial girls? I feel sorry if you think that love doesn't exist or that people confuse love with having someone make you feel better about yourself. Because that is NOT what love is about.

Sounds like you're reaching out of your league. If you're overweight or unattractive, you should pursue overweight or unattractive girls. If physical beauty in your partner is so important to you, then you should work harder to match that standard yourself. Also, you sound extremely bitter. Being rejected is no fun, but don't let it turn you into a pessimistic, cynical man, hiding behind the label of "realistic". It's not very realistic at all to hold sweeping generalizations as truth. Everyone is not shallow. Many people (women AND men) are, especially around my age and under (24), but not all. You're going for the wrong type, if that's the only kind of woman that you encounter.

Get yourself back in shape, work on not taking rejection so personally, and get out there and find someone that you're compatible with. Or keep holding onto your paper shield of cynicism, and see where it takes you. Either way, I wish you good luck!

Movies I've seen in 2010: http://www.flixster.com/movie-list/2010-movies-6

You really, really don't sound like you have a great personality. You sound very off-putting, in fact.

Look, appearance is certainly going to be a factor in these things. Everybody has different tastes, but with few exceptions, we all respond physically to whatever we personally find "attractive." There's no way around that. But that's not the same thing as saying there's some uniform set of criteria for attraction, or that looks are the sole (or even primary) criterion. There are shallow people out there who rely solely on looks or money as sources of attraction. But when you have a planet with 7.5 billion unique personalities, you can hardly avoid finding some people of that sort, just as you can hardly avoid finding people who are gay or into weird fetishes or prefer short people or have little interest in sex or get turned on by philosophical discourses or...well, you get the point. In your case, you've chosen to extrapolate your personal failings onto society at large, and it's terribly unattractive...at least to me and to people I know.

I'll be the first to admit that, being considered a reasonably but not extraordinarily attractive person has occasionally made things easier for me. I've never been actually rich, just comfortable, so that's a non-factor. But intelligence, confidence, and gregariousness are the traits that do the real work. Being able to hold my own in the looks department ultimately has had very little effect on my overall lifestyle, and will have less and less effect as I get older and less conventionally (i.e. youthfully) attractive. If you don't think your attitude is a major source of your inability to attract people, you're doomed to repeat the cycle of futility indefinitely. This isn't an attack, simply an observation you might benefit from heeding.