things you *won't* see or hear from ol' Gormsby :
* namby-pamby human relationship lezzie mumbo-jumbo, 'mummy didn't breast-feed me untill I was seven' nonsense
* pulling the pin because he feels guilty about being knocked-up by some cad with a ponytail
* going AWOL. He's never had a sick day in his life. Nor will you find him going off running to the P.P.T.bloodyA., going on strike, holding balloons, singing nursery rhymes, so he can get a pay rise, extra holidays, 'tonguey leave' and a warm flannel to whipe his boyfriend's bum with
* namby-pamby Witi Ihimaera lesbian awareness-week maori-magic mumbo-jumbo realism
* going on strike so he can get paid matrimonial tonguey-leave for his boyfriend's dead poodle
* painting his face, putting a flower in his hair and stampeding parliament with a heard of tone-deaf lesbians
* Camcorder, what's my motivation, once-more-with-feeling nonsense
'Beethoven had his critics too Keithy, see if you can name three of them' - Chopper