MovieChat Forums > Hard Candy (2006) Discussion > How many viewers know what a paedophile ...

How many viewers know what a paedophile is? How many care?


A paedophile is a person who finds prepubescent boys or girls sexually attractive, but you wouldn't know it if you watched this film or listened to a news reporter or even the Prime Minister of Great Britain. The word is widely misused to mean child molester or just generally sex offender who targets under 18s and in a film that's centred around a person's torture and eventual suicide, it's pretty important that we're clear on what we mean when we say "he's a pedophile".

This is actually is very serious problem that few people, it seems, have given thought to. Because most people don't differentiate between a child molester and a person who simply has the attraction, many people are misdirecting their hatred towards anybody with the condition rather than those who have actually abused children. This is passionate hatred of any adult who finds a child attractive is obviously not rightly earned because nobody has any choice in what looks attractive to them - it was no more anybody here's decision not to find children attractive than it was another's decision to be a paedophile.

Something few people are aware of is the suffering of teenagers who are discovering their sexual orientation like everybody else and find they are attracted to children. Many young people in that situation struggle with immense guilt, shame, and conflict because of the seething hatred of paedophiles - hatred of the condition rather than hatred of the act of child abuse. The situation gets even worse when you take a look at what just about every person's advice would be to somebody who discovers that they find children attractive, "Get help!".

If you were a paedophile, how comfortable and safe would you feel telling another person about it? And that's just it - most will never open up and tell anybody about it and that includes doctors or therapists. There are people who have actually abused children who might not have done had they sought and received help - the environment we have created is *terrible* when it comes to preventing sexual abuse! We need to see the madness we've been perpetuating and treat it as we do every other psychological condition - we *help* people with the condition, we don't hate them and strike fear into them!

The reality is that most paedophiles do not sexually offend, not all are even in need of therapy as a person's sexuality (set of attractions) cannot be changed, all that can be treated is a person's urges to solicit sex and many paedophiles do not struggle with any such urges.

We are currently in the stage the Victorians were in when they feared, hated, and punished schizophrenics. Now we understand that it's senseless to hate a person for having an illness and we treat it humanely and intelligently. There is no such thing as a "defence of paedophilia" just as there is no "defence of schizophrenia" - it's an unchosen condition, it can't be morally judged.

If we insist on satisfying torture fantasies and relishing thoughts of violence and murder then at least we should be clear that we're directing these at people who have raped or murdered children (murdering a child is far more the act of a rapist than a child molester acting out of attraction - the Jeff character in real life would likely not be a paedophile at all, not that the creators seemed to care) - I find such vengeance to be barbaric and beneath us as human beings, I understand the emotions but to wish for it is a very ugly, dark and disturbing thing, I find.

The Jeff character was worthy of hatred but not because "he'd a pedophile" - because he was a rapist and a murderer. If we don't bother to differentiate between the two then more and more people will continue to suffer - innocent adults and innocent children.

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I'm sure pedo rights will be treated with the sympathy of gay rights as soon as they stop molesting all these people's children

Seriously though... even if this film was garbage I believe discouraging sexual deviancy with the threat of violence is mighty more effective than locking them up or understanding their needs and giving them therapy etc...

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Yes. Let's kill people who have done nothing wrong. You know, just to make sure that they won't do anything. A pedophile and child-molester are two different things.

We don't beat people up for things they never chose. God, people like you make me so angry.

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This whole post is so offensive to me as a lesbian I feel like bursting into tears. You need to know homosexuality is about love, we pair up for life if we can be so lucky, like any heterosexual couple. How would a pedophile feel about his partner being a mature adult? Would he still want to be with her? No? Because it's entirely lust. Don't confuse the two and don't ever refer to pedophillia as a sexuality. Sexuality is attraction to a gender (a sex) not an age grouping. If I were a pedo I would chemically castrate myself so I knew I'd never ruin a child's innocence but people like you make them feel sorry for themselves. They should feel sorry for themselves, they should feel sorry for what their capable of. Would me being married to a woman crush a family? I don't think so. Would seeing me unable to control MY urges and holding my girlfriends hand walking down the street cause great pain to you or those you love? I'm embarrassed just having to tell my doctor I'm gay so I can imagine these people would be mortified at seeking help but if they weren't selfish people they'd rather put themselves through hell than put a child through it.

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[deleted]

"How would a pedophile feel about his partner being a mature adult? Would he still want to be with her? No? Because it's entirely lust."

Honest question. How would you feel if your partner were suddenly a man?
Would you find them less physically attractive? How is that different from another physical attraction like what we are talking about? I don't mean this as an attack but with the new way gender is being understood as organic, then one can only both hetero and homosexuality as merely principles of physical attraction.

Beyond that, you make a solid point about two consenting adults vs an adult and a minor.

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Actually, paedophilia is supposed to be about feet-lovers.

The term designating devious adults attracted to children is pederasty.

...don't ask me why there's a confusion over these terms.

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canttelliftrollingorserious

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I completely agree.

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[deleted]

I think some poster have misunderstood, I have to say I am on the fence, is pedophilia is a mental illness, which is how people used to view homosexuality (not that I'm in any way saying they are a like) and still do in some places. Maybe they can't help or treat being a pedophile anymore then you or I could help or be 'cured' of being heterosexual or gay! I'm sure in 50 or so years we'll have made our mind up what category to put them in.

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I think using the comparison of homosexuality is wrong. There may be some merit in saying that both are genetic (I certainly think homosexuality is, if you get my point). But homosexuals are not dangerous to society whereas paedophiles are. A lot of the arguments here seem to suggest that homosexuality was seen as wrong in the past but is now seen as OK, and that someday in the future, being a paedophile will be accepted or seen as OK. I may hold some reserve about how a paedophile should be punished for what they do (they do seem to be hard wired that way and no amount of punishment stops them) but my opinion is that a paedophile should be locked up until they are no longer a danger to children.

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I'm currently looking at 15-30 years in prison for downloading child pornography. This child pornography isn't what everyone assumes when I say child pornography: grown men raping children. No, this was nude photos of 14-17 year old girls who took the photos themselves and uploaded them to the internet. I've never touched a child, and I never would touch a child. If I ever felt the urge to touch a child, I'd put a bullet in my own head, believe me. Anyway, I had about 5 of these pictures, and now I'm looking at 15-30 years on a federal charge. People who actually molest children get as little as 30 *DAYS*! God bless America.

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That's *beep* up, if true. What state?

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Gads, hopefully you are serving time at this point. You can justify your downloading of these pictures all you want, but you're still perverted to want to see them, and you were breaking the law for doing it.

I agree, the laws are screwed up when people molest children and do not get proper punishment, and that pisses me off to no end. But you are guilty of a sexual offense against a minor and deserve to pay for that crime.

Like I said, hopefully you are locked up and not even reading this.

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Thank you.

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Good post, OP.


Sadly, as many replies attest, people would rather demonise than attempt to understand.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MpUWrl3-mc8

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Not all 14-year-olds can bear children. It used to be quite common for girls to not start their periods until they were 14-18 until we started to put hormones in food. It's very dangerous for teens, especially those under 15 to have kids. Women in their 20s do the best in terms of health outcomes followed closely behind women in their early 30s.

At the same time there are 8 and 9 year old girls who have started their periods. Saying old enough to bleed, old enough to breed is pretty sick. There are cultures that have child marriages and believe girls should start having kids as soon as they can. They are all third world, backwater *beep* holes and many of the girls suffer terribly like fistulas because they have kids so young.

The idea of 14-year-olds being completely done with puberty is nonsense. A woman's hips don't fully broaden out until she's 16-18 years of age. Most women's hormones and cycles may not fully regulate until her early 20's. Most girls who start their periods have anovulation cycles because they are still growing!

The idea of young teens being married off regularly to adult men is an extreme historical exaggeration. It happened in pre historic times, sure, when people were just living a hand to mouth existence. It still happens in 3rd world hellholes like Yemen and certain parts of rural Ethiopia. It happened for royalty but that was to cement alliances and actually didn't happen that much for non royals. King Henry the Seventh's mom gave birth to him at 13 which led her to be infertile the rest of her life. Most women in the Middle Ages were married off in their late teens or early twenties to men who were not a lot older than them. Humans are smart and realized that a young woman makes for a healthier mom and baby than a girl who just started puberty.

Yes, younger girls (and boys) have been exploited but most societies have engaged in slavery, mass rape and genocide. Just because your ancestors may have did something doesn't make it necessarily acceptable.

So you older guys thinking that the world owes you pubescent girls because of what you think you know of biology or history are wrong.

As far as porn goes always make sure it is 18 USC 2257 certified. EVERY legit porn site has this. (generally at the bottom of the wite). You can always look at 18-21 year-olds online doing everything imaginable if you want to look at "young stuff". This isn't a new law and has been around since the Traci Lords era. If you are looking at dodgy porn you only have yourself to blame considering how easily accessible legit porn is. In the US even if a girl is 17 years and 364 days old it's still illegal to posess.

If you are attracted to kids then do your best to stay the hell away from them. Most non pedophile adults can't stand most kids and do our best to stay away from them. There was some kid wailing away when my company and I were going to sit down for lunch and we moved the hell away and sat at another table. Too many kids are molested by you guys. Jack off all you want to your own fantasies but don't try to rationalize pedophilia as harmless.

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