There have been several posts regarding Nina's point of view (or the POV of the Child victim). What is the POV of the father/purpetrator? I know he is disgusted with himself but what initially prompted him to molest his daughter? And what keeps making him do it despite his disgust with himself? I know this is some sort of psychological illness, but can anyone explain what it is? Thanks.
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I can only guess his relationship with his wife shut down years ago and he went through some weird emotional transference where he began having that relationship with his daughter.
The root cause? Who knows - maybe he worked too much, his wife went nuts with pills due to being ignored, and then he began substituting his daughter for his wife. Or maybe his wife just a basket case who went off the deep end with the same results.
Either way I didn't get the impression he was just a sex addict or violent. He appeared to be trying to have a relationship with Elisha Cuthbert, sort of in a Humbert Humbert way (which is what I'd guess was used as a character inspiration).
The part I didn't get was how Elisha went along with it. Clearly she was falling apart, but it seemed like she had been going along with it for a long time.
Clearly she was afraid of him. He raped her. When he forced himself on her, she played along so that he wouldn't get violent.
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"I can only guess his relationship with his wife shut down years ago and he went through some weird emotional transference where he began having that relationship with his daughter."
Any decent psychology book will tell you this begins since childhood, most probably by incest, which brings a chicken-egg dilemma. Marriage is totally irrelevant.
Elisha went along with it because she was a victim, and victims tend to punish themselves because of low self-esteem and helplessness, creating a vicious cycle. Also, she can't distinguish healthy paternal "love" from sick behavior.
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When all of your wishes are granted, many of your dreams will be destroyed.
and yet she knows there's something wrong. I think also that its part of the stockholm syndrome, where psychologically, hostages bond with their captors. it allows them to sort of ignore the truth of what's really going on so they can psychologically cope. I think elisha's character is doing the same thing.
http://heidi-tan.blogspot.com
I didn't think she was afraid of him. In fact, she admitted to Dot that she loved it, then hated him and herself afterwards. It was those conflicting emotions that led her to do what she did.
sharei dont think she really loved it; i think she wanted to think she loved it because it was her way of coping with something so psychologically harmful. she was in denial, so to speak. She hated herself and him afterwards because she blames herself for having it happen (as sexual assault victims usually do) and hates him for making her do it. I think she DEFINATELY was afraid of him!
http://heidi-tan.blogspot.com
That said, I don't pretend I can even imagine what she's going through, but she did get pretty graphic in her description of it. My feeling is it was only after it was over and the realization of what they were doing that the self loathing began. I got the feeling that it was consensual and that she could've stopped it at any time. Just by her mannerisms and the way talked down to him at times, I didn't get the feeling she was scared. Maybe that was a method she used to cope.
sharehow can that have been "consensual"??? seriously... come on! ok, here's what i think: the father started when nina was 6 years old... remember the goldfish story? that was probably around the time the mother was less and less appealing to daddy. he married her a virgin. just as he liked it. at some point he wouldn't have liked his daughter either anymore... she'd be used up in his mind, and he'd gone for dot. -- nina talked in graphic ways to dot because she had the need to shock her. it was a cry for help. parents are supposed to protect and love their children. her mother was ignorant and trapped in that weird stupor and the only "love" nina knew from her father was a sexual one. how's she supposed to sort this all out on her own? she was scared of him, even IF she talked down to him. after all, she listened to him when he made her send her friend home or he wouldn't let her go out. the only way to deal with his jealousies was to play along... nina adapted to her situation, as any person would. sadly to say, in a strange and sick sense it was the healthy thing to do for this girl to survive.
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sometimes victims of sexual abuse actually enjoy it while being repulsed by it at the ame time. its very confusining and is why alot of them end up feeling guilty shameful.or even blame theirselves for theabse. its lile nina knew it was wrong but a part of her thinks this is just a way for her father to show her that he loves her...shes been sexually abused by him all her life her concept of love is skewed.
sharesometimes victims of sexual abuse actually enjoy it while being repulsed by it at the ame time.
I got the impression he was disgusted with himself and knew what he was doing was wrong but this doesn't really make him less of a monster, just somewhat self-aware
Do guys like "the thing"?
They like it better than no thing.
Addiction, when u start using drugs the more u go the less u r capable of stopping
some lines r just like that, once u cross them u get weaker and weaker until u can't control urself no matter how disgusted u r
but starting it from the beginning? hard to say, really hard
that is a line that no matter what u gotta avoid thinking of crossing it, once u start u easily find urself crossing it and harder to stop
prolly he started thinking and then couldn't realize what happened b4 that addiction got to him
still hard to think that someone could do this to their own daughters, too ugly.
"It is never about what happened, it is only how you look at it!"
Hard to believe any rational being can swallow the nonsense of "sex addiction" -- or addiction to shopping, gambling, etc.
Just a convenient excuse for morons that have no willpower and no character at all -- but of course doctors (especially psychiatrists) and insurance companies love the idea since they can rake in millions for "treating" this pathetic scam.
Most drug "addiction" falls into the same category, which is why only the weak get "addicted." Most patients who take morphine or hydrocodone or oxycodone for real pain have no trouble quitting when the source of the pain is gone. The only ones who DO have a problem are those who have a history of drug or alcohol problems. Their problem is twofold -- they are WEAK, and they LIKE the high, or buzz. I took heavy doses of morphine for 6 months, and when the infections were cured, I just stopped. Aside from a few severe cramps, that I took care of with low doses of morphine for a few days, quitting was nothing. And I did a LOT of drugs in the 60s.
Congrats on outgrowing this awful writing style!! You punctuation still needs some work, however. :)
I don't love her.. She kicked me in the face!!