MovieChat Forums > Hauru no ugoku shiro (2005) Discussion > The things I learned watching Howl's Mov...

The things I learned watching Howl's Moving Castle...

posted 14 years ago by diddymuck
19 replies | jump to latest

Don't take short cuts! They're full of rapists, sleeping drunks, flamboyant magicians and creepizoid henchmen made of tar, and curiously nobody else!

If you're the least attractive member of your family, wear clothes as plain as possible in order to stay that way.

A magician who dresses impeccably and weeps when his good looks are "ruined" doesn't mind living in a house stacked to the ceiling with raw garbage!

A film made in Japan about people living in Middle Europe should have characters with British accents, Midwest US soldiers, a witch from California and a Fire Demon from Brooklyn.

If a 700 pound Mae West impersonator comes into your locked office, ask her how in the world she successfully got through the door! Then ask her how she unlocked it!

[–] diddymuck 13 years ago

If a person is bewitched into an unrecognizable crone of 90, its a good idea to sneak away without telling anybody and get isolated in the freezing wasteland about 200 miles out of town. Hey, it'll help!

Older women seem to relish cigars for some reason...Sophie's mom carries one around and the Witch imbibes on it.

The castle's architecture must be a product of magic! It a 20 story set of stairs out front and even ground with aircraft at the ready in back!!!

Somehow the electric light got re-finagled as a torture device while the general population uses oil lamps in their homes.

[–] greenargyle42 13 years ago

If you are magically turned into a cranky, 90-year-old woman, and you happen to meet a magically animate scarecrow with a turnip for its head, you should definitely be rude to it, make fun of it for always getting stuck upside down, yell at it to leave you alone, and mention that it is your least favorite vegetable. This will ensure that you become the scarecrow's one true love, and when you break down and kiss him in the end, he will become a prince.

[–] Dinosaw 13 years ago

Becareful, because you might age a lot if climb a lot of stairs.

Not every man who calls himself beautiful, wear bright earrings and have a long blonde hair is gay.

You can teleport through anywhere with your door.

90 year old women (Witch of the Waste) can be as horny as a teenager, and also be paedophiles - winking at men, saying young men like Howl are cute, etc .

We all live in suspense from day to day; you are the hero of your own story.

[–] filmsbythefire 12 years ago

The worst kind of witch is the kind that cleans.

If you're a little boy and you want to look like a convincing old man, just wear a long beard and cloak, cross your eyes, then talk in as gruff a voice as you can manage. Nobody will know the difference.

When defending your tacky little hat shop from a massive and well-dressed woman, be sure to check she's not a witch before you insult her.

All 90 year old women sound 'ghastly', apparently.

Getting fat will not provide you with any insulation.

When asking a scarecrow to find you a place to stay, be sure to specify that you do NOT mean the local heart-eating nutcase's castle.

Don't deny an old witch her pleasures.

Accidentally dyeing your hair red is cause for the near-obliteration of your entire living room, complete mental breakdown and melting.

[–] dancingtree_10 12 years ago

Calcifer is 'a pretty fire'

Walking up a flight of stairs will make you sweat like crazy and cause you to age

[–] diddymuck 9 years ago

A cordon of ships leave in the morning and a shattered wreck returns in about an hour or so. War may be hell, but its also remarkably brief!

Books in Howl's collection are about the size of your average auto tailgate!

Getting older causes your nose to grow about three more inches...your nostrils, too!

[–] PreachCaleb 9 years ago

Always be kind to scarecrows.

Can't stop the signal.