1. It's okay to hook up in front of a main road.. doesn't matter if people cna see.
2. Never trust the new girl.
3. Don't fall for the new girl.
continue..?
4. Never say you love the new girl when you don't.
5. Never tell her to *beep* off after you've screwed her.
6. NEVER underestimate the new girl
I'm your age...only younger.
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10. Never CHEAT on your gf
11. Learn how to swim :P
12. Don't tell a girl you love her and then take it back
13. Never tell strange girls your dirty secrets.
14. Don't just give in to your lusts.
15. When you have a psycho girlfriend, be sure to have (and routinely check) airbags in your car.
"I'd say this cloud is Cumulo Nimbus."
"Didn't he discover America?"
"Penfold, shush."
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19. Don't watch swimfan more then once.
20. If you're a cop, don't ride next to a murder who isn't even cuffed behind her back.
21. Don't watch swimfan more then once. Seriously.
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23. If you're a psycho, make sure you take swimming lessons (you never know when they'll come in handy).
share24. Whenever a psycho is trying to drown your girlfriend and lets you know that you can stop it all by saying that you love her, insist on telling the truth instead.
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www.schlaflos-derfilm.de
25. Read all above 24 comments if you've got a girlfriend already and a hot new girl comes into town.
share29. Erika Christensen is a terrible actress
share30. Movies with an anticlimax and cheap ending suck
share
31. If you enter a swimming pool late at night knowing that a psycho girl has your girlfriend in there and is just waiting for you to show up before killing her, make sure you charge in yelling her name at the opposite end of the pool to where they both are, thus giving the psycho plenty of warning that you're there and lots of opportunity to push your girlfriend in the pool to her death before you can do anything about it.
32. Pretty 115 pound blond girls can be excellent killers.
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35. when talking to a psycho chick the scene will always cut between weird faces
36. Erika Christensen takes awkward PG-13 nudie pics
37. never choke a psycho chick like your about to make out
38. the guy from hackers was in this movie
39. the guy from clockstoppers was in this movie
40. the entire script of swim fan is a palindrome (check it )
41. cell phones didnt exist in 2002
Starring in that 227 movie "New Jack`ee City"
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42. Peeing in a cup is amusing, (his friends face after their drug test)
43. remember to check ur car after cheating with psychos in case they leave their panties as a parting gift
44. a bat is a weapon that can be used to frame someone for murder...?
45. Even if you cannot swim, you will still be able to have sex in a pool.
46. Hospitals will willingly call the name of someone over the intercom if you ask
47. Nuns give out the personal information of a coma patient no questions asked.
48. You can kill somebody, break into a school, throw his body in a pool, break into a locker, and place the murder weapon there without getting caught or leaving prints.
49. BC does not just stand for Ben Cronin.
50. The way to an old man's heart is naked women
51. If you call out the name of another man during sex, pretend it's foreplay. Otherwise you will be forced to kill him.
52. Naked pictures are far more effective when the camera is not blocking the breasts.
53. Ben Cronin's girlfriend tried to drive drunk
54. Amy faints when thrown in water
55. Jesse Bradford has the best scream in the world
56. Ben's coach is clearly on something
57. Josh and his girlfriend broke up because he was an ass
58. Even if you, your friends, and your family are targeted by a psychotic girl who nearly kills you, you still will not be allowed back on the swim team.
59. Do not doubt the strength of a teenage girl. She can overtake just about everyone.
60. When a girl claims it will just be "your little secret," she is lying.
61. If you are a police officer or want to become a police officer- repeat number 16 and don't forget it.
share62. When you're at loss for words, just throw out "I'm handy all over the place." Works every time.
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~*~Mystica~*~
63. Every typical student athlete wants to go to Stanford.
64. High Schoolers can get a job at a hospital (somehow)?
65. Just like in real life, its easy to mess with other's drug tests.
66. Pools are always poorly lit, no exceptions.
67. Funerals are boring, as usual.
68. The killer will always show up to the funeral of the victim, so yeah, remember that for the next time this happens to you.
69. Cello=Instrument of Satan.
70. People read newspapers in 2002.
71. Poor editing is for comedies, not thrillers.
72. Watching Swimfan on television makes you appreciate commercial breaks.
73. When you need to get cuffs off someone you will always have that crazy chick's bobby pin STILL in your pants pocket after all the crazy crap she did to you and your family.
shareIf you are being stalked, never contact the police about it, even if you can prove it
share75. If you're tired and can't sleep, just watch Shiri Appleby's performance in this movie.
76. If you leave Jesse Bradford alone, he'll get his life back together.
77. Before you jump in the pool that you are forbidden to go into, you won't notice your friend laying dead in the middle of it.
78. When you steal a car, and put a baseball cap on, you look exactly like the person your stalking.
79. Police officers in the US sit in the back seat, beside a psycho killer who's handcuffed infront of her.
80. Once you kill the cops that are taking you to jail, you can drive around in the cop car without anyone being suspicious.
81. When officers don't show up with the psycho girl, they don't send out any additional units.
82. The night you get run over by a car, they send you home.
83. When you get run over, your parents/friends won't come visit you, and doctors/nurses/orderlies/etc are nowhere to be found, giving the psycho ample opportunity to kill you with a scalpel (in a hospital).
84. ...Kinda goes with 83. You can walk around a hospital holding a scalpel and no one suspects a thing.
85. Bobby pins work wonders to unlock handcuffs.
86. Psycho girl won't speed 100 miles to kill poor innocent Shiri, instead she takes the car and gently "bumps" the rear of the bike while YOU'RE STILL ON IT. and the next thing you know you're in bed injured and hurt.
LOL this movie fails.
87. You don't need to be a nurse or doctor in order to pass out medications in a hospital, just make sure your mother is a doctor there.
88. It is perfectly acceptable in a hospital to have an entire floor of patients' medications premeasured and put into little cups where anyone could get to them.
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(703): I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
89. If the person being paged doesn't come to the nurse's station within 5 seconds, they will page him or her another 10 times within the next 30 seconds.
90. Hospitals put patients names on the outside of their rooms, because that isn't an invasion of privacy. They also write their names on pieces of tape.
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(703): I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
91. Ben is apparently REALLY good in bed...and in a pool.
92. The 'little secret' is not so little after all.
93. Psycho stalkers will steal your keys and mess with your head by inexplicably unlocking antitheft devices on your car.
94. Gee its not insane or anything to think a guy loves you even when he has told you to go away, to pretend the sex never happened, has choked you, threatened you, and set you up for the police to arrest you.
95. One hit from a sports trophy will knock you out instantly.
96. Madison should have paid more attention when Ben was 'trying to show her how to swim'.
"I'd say this cloud is Cumulo Nimbus."
"Didn't he discover America?"
"Penfold, shush."
97. No need for the locker combo if you have a hair pin.
98. Cello players can float out of their bodies.
99. Don't choke the girl you had sex with after you get fired..
100. Psycho stalker chicks will try to get your attention by sending you 85 emails in one day.
101. Psycho chicks are blonde while the good girls are brunettes (...nod to Fatal Attraction).
102. Psycho chicks die in water (okay...another nod to Fatal Attraction :)
"I can't stand a naked light bulb, any more than..a rude remark or a vulgar action" Blanche DuBois
103. If you're being chased by a psycho bitch and need to call the cops, don't have a cell phone (even in 2002 when I had a cell phone at the at of 12!).
your wife looks my dinner after I eat
104. People from New Jersey can get to a random hospital in NYC in about 5 minutes.
105. Dorks and geeks who wear hearing aids have girly beds in their bedroom.
106. Cello players are automatically wealthy.
107. Cello players with average talent have a gaggle of anciently old ladies come to their impromptu cello concerts.
108. It's perfectly okay to be in high school and have a job at night that goes until 1 or 2 in the morning. It helps you with your grades.
"Hey guys! Whoa, Big Gulps huh? All right! Well, see ya later!" Dumb & Dumber
109. The main character looks like Freddie Prinz JR.
110. If you are in a serious relationship, get into a swimming pool with a girl you just met.
111. Your girlfriend will believe your story of not calling her the night before because you were studying at a friend's house late.
112. Cell phones were very unknown back then.
113. Its okay to have sex without a condom because the chlorine will save you from possible AIDS and knocking up the chick you are banging.
114. It's relatively easy to put steroids into a piss cup sample.
115. It's also relatively easy to *beep* with a dude's meds cart while he's gone for 15 seconds.
"Hey guys! Whoa, Big Gulps huh? All right! Well, see ya later!" Dumb & Dumber
116. Muscular athletic champions can effortlessly lift their girlfriends, except when they're cuffed to a light wooden chair.
117. Muscular athletic champions can be clubbed to death by girls half their weight.
118. Pools are incredibly dangerous when you can't swim, even if you're roughly five ft. from the side and can literally walk to safety.
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Giving someone an oral medication can instantly make them go into cardiac arrest.
share120. Friends are supposed to bring flowers when it's their mother's birthday
121. When a guy doesn't want to go to an empty parentless house: something's wrong!
122. When a girl is about to push your gf in the water and all she asks for is a ''i love you'' JUST SAY IT!
113. Also, no one will notice your cum in the water the next day.
share1)Calling the guy you're dating his friend's name while fooling around is a no-no.
2)If the guy you're writing emails to won't respond to any of them, just send him a naked picture of yourself. He still might not respond to you but at least it will get his attention.
3)CPR does wonders.
4) Never have your girlfriend/boyfriend get something for you from your car....you just never know.
5) Don't say "I Love You" to someone if you don't mean it, the other person will just end up getting the wrong idea.
6) Finding your initials inside a stranger's notebook is a red flag.
129. Don't leave your car keys on a hook by the front door. Especially when you have a crazy girl stalking you.
130. When said crazy girl tells you, "I haven't eaten all day", don't take her out for diner food.
131. This is a really bad rip-off of "Fatal Attraction" for teens.
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