Great Show, as we all know. But can you remember the classic Tom and Linda One liners? I'm sure there are plenty of fans out there
Linda: "Bitch, I do not look like Elizabeth the first"
Linda: "you can only judge a Sh*t hole from the turds that pass through it"
Tom: " The first sight of you jumping around in skin tight Lyrca is enough to turn any man Queer"
LOL HILARIOUS
"...I must have thought your nose was a little penis" when Linda shagged that taxi twat hahaha
"My sofa's my bestfriend = cheers!" From the sofa mad ad hahaha
"...I wouldn't mind having him stick his hand up my skirt and making me lips move if you know what I mean?" from ep 1 hahaha
THE BEST SHOW EVER
After Suze has sung the football song, and she giggles and goes 'Gosh it's so appropriate isn't it?!'
:D
I got dirt on Maisy Gibbons.
When Tom gets into bed with Linda because he had a bad dream
linda "awww this is lovely, it's just like that part in the sound of music"
Tom "what part"
Linda "you know when all them little kiddies are scared and they get into bed with the nun and she sings "down town""
I love this show1
When Suze comes in depressed.
Suze - Jez is leaving me!
and Linda laughs at her!
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Linda: How do I look?
Tom: Like a vibrator.
Heidi Honeycomb: I need lubrication!
Linda (talking about Tom): Yeah, I've heard him shout that in the night!
(or something along similar to that)
Shaun: Do you want anything from the shop?
Ed: Cornetto.
Tom: I cannot believe that u tried to fake a terminal illness to get me to stay here!
Linda: Eh, worked for Angie Watts
Tom: Den & angie were married!
Linda: Well so are we basically. We live together, we row all the time, we never have sex - what's the difference?
God there's so many!
Tom: He's early!
Linda: Oh that's so heterosexual!
Tom: I am tw*tted!
Beverly Ann: Is that a welsh name sir?
Linda: I should have been black really. It's pure fluke of nature that I weren't
Jez: Yes and I'm sure having white parents didn't help either.
Tom: Jez come closer for my sight is poor. I think I'll pull through but it's touch and go..touch and...go.
Tom: How dare you not be a wife batterer? How BLOODY dare you!
Linda: Oi Shirley get down here and give him his bath you selfish w*nker!
Tom: Linda LeHughes!
Linda: Oh I'm sorry was I too bleeding heart?
Tom on the phone: Their just playing..the dialing tone oh they hung up oh what a bitch!
And the classic
Tom: Walk up to the phone box, walk up to the phone box,
pick up the receiver, pick up the receiver, take the baby for a walk!
I'll have you know that's my knee you're straddling!
Linda: "Daddy used to say I was a good time to be 'ad by all!"
shareTom: That is SO RIDIC!!
shareSome of my faves:
Lynda: I've got a big heart!
Tom: Not half as big as your arse!
Struggling to walk on the newly polished floor...
Jez: This is jolly good fun isn't it? Like being at Alton Towers.
Lynda: 'ear, I love a good ride!
Talking about Sugar Walls...
Tom (Being over dramatic): What sort of a sister are you?
Lynda: Spurned!!!
Tom (Storming out): Don't you dare be vulgar!
Tom: For the love of Twiggy we haven't hoovered!
[cK]
In Stiff
Italian guy: 'You too ugly, you too ugly'
Linda: 'Your English is very bad, the word your looking for is beautiful, beautiful'.
Little boy blue come blow my horn
Excuse me,do you wannt to shag me?
Butt out or get pretty one of the two
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The bounce has gone from his bungee
OMG I've sat here laughing my friggen head off at all these quotes! I looove Gimmie Gimmie Gimmie, they should so bring it back! I have sooooo many favourite quotes some are:
Linda: Special people paint with potatoes Linda, and you are a special person! LMAO
Linda : I aint phobic about 'omos, i just can't stand the sight of em.
Linda : Eurgh Taxt twat was in my bed all along!
Tom : Leo - Stay away from mini skirts you look like a stupid fat slag in them
Linda : There aint no such thing as bisexual, it's just greediness.
Tom : The only time you've been on tv is when you walked past the window on Richard and Judy!, such a sad bitch
I looove lindas face in this bit LMAO!
Linda : D'you know, I think they must a got a puppy for Christmas, cos I could hear her fella shouting in the background "I'm not havin' that dog back in my house" and then she said "party's off".
Linda : Oi stop looking at my tits you rotten bugger! so funny!
Linda : (to zippy) ear mate how old are you
Zippy : 26
Linda : LIAR!!! Tom that's physically impossible! he's older than I am!
OMG the CLASSIC quote! Linda : We wash this many dishes in orrdinaary liquid, AND THIS MANY IN FAAIIIRRRYYYY LIQUID! LOVE IT!!
Daisy : Doncha linda ay ay ay (I loves this episode she was hilarious!)
I have sooooo many more i Love! soo funny!
i love this one when hidehi comes through the door
Lnda: are you catherine zeta jones? people have always me compared to you
also these few
Linda: thrush?! I'VE HAD IT!
Tom: oh its like that really violent film ,erm, chocolate orange!
hahahaha!
oh just thought of another one where tom linda etc are at the table eating:
Linda: oh your cocks so cheesy tom.
hardy har har :)
TOM: Rick says kiss a smoker kiss an ashtray
LINDA: I say kiss a Rick kiss a prick
LINDA: I look like that *beep* trannie from Coronation Street
Linda-'It's not home design it's fenghul shuoi!'
Nurse-'stop smoking Linda!'
Linda-'But it gives you vitamins mummy said!'
You're my wife nooowww!!!
About Zippy's Dad
Linda: You see I know very little about him other than we met at a party and he was dressed as a pillar box.
Tom: Was it a fancy dress party Mummy?
Linda: This is the worrying thing Daddy no!
On Tom's birthday...
Linda: Oh I hope im not this mean when i get to 30
Tom: Your 36..
Linda: Bollocks! In 28!
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Linda: I had a naughty nighty once.. i've done a 70 minus 1 in it.
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Tom: Oh Linda its saturday night and what am I doing...
Linda: Your doing my head in mush.
Gary Oldman
'How Do Ya Spell Holiday? - *beep*
The one I like went something along the lines of... Look it's my sister sugar remeber from the last series
*insert worthless quote here*
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lol and also this one from the millennium episode:
Linda: What's it like havin a knob?
Tom: It's bloody great
Linda: It's quite nice havin a patty too.
Tom: ...A patty?
Linda: Yeah thats what mummy used to call it. I used to get up in the mornin for school and mummy would say ave you brushed your teeth, i'd go yeah (I adn't!) she'd go ave you washed behind your ears, ave you cleaned your patty? I used to laugh me ead off when Patty Bouley(sp?) came on tele!
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Beryl: "Was he a Ventriliquist?"
Linda: " Well i wouldn't mind him sticking his hand up my skirt and making my lips move"