MovieChat Forums > Office Space (1999) Discussion > 100 things we learned from Office Space

100 things we learned from Office Space

posted 10 years ago by leon_kratz
38 replies | jump to latest

I don't know if there was a similar thread in the past, but here goes...

1. Consult an occupational hypnotherapist if you hate your job and your problem will be solved instantly...or even better...get involved in a car accident and receive a sum of money consisting of SEVEN FIGURES.
2. Don't go to work, but sleep it off instead whenever you feel like it.
3. Just work hard enough not to get fired when you have a serious motivational problem at work.
4. Duck out early from work and turn off your answering machine in order to avoid overtime.
5. A programmer for a software company does about fifteen minutes of real, actual, work in a given week. The remainder of the week consists of staring at the desk and spacing out.
6. A true gangsta in action at work occupies the boss' parking lot and disassembles his own cubicle.

[–] MoviemanCin 8 years ago

35. Always make sure which Lumbergh you're talking about.
36. If you order a Mai Tai at a beach resort, and they bring you a pina colada instead, you should consider putting strychnine in the guacamole.
37. Always check to see if your boss's door is really locked.
38. If you have a Porsche and it gets towed, they'll probably yank the back bumper off.
39. Getting exercise, making some bucks, and working outdoors is good.
40. It's not that Peter is lazy, he just doesn't care.
41. If Lawrence had a million dollars, he'd do two chicks at one time.
42. Today is the worst day of Peter's life.
43. The ratio of people to cake is too big.
44. Tom Smykowski has people skills.
45. Lawrence is cool.
46. Drew likes to show chicks his Oh face.
47. Lawrence has a feeling that Anne is cheating on Peter.

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar and doesn't.

[–] yesanything 8 years ago

The jar is for charity, the tray is for sharing

[–] MoviemanCin 8 years ago

49. In a week Peter really only does about 15 minutes work.
50. Brian at Chotchkie's is a pretty boy.
51. Milton is a pinche gringo.
52. Nina in Corporate Accounts gets a LOT of phone calls.
53. Peter is a straight shooter with upper management written all over him
54. Milton was told he could listen to the radio at a reasonable volume between 9 and 11.
55. Samir is a really good break dancer.
56. Peter's girlfriend Anne is anorexic.

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar and doesn't.

[–] juror12 8 years ago

57. Bob celebrates Michael Bolton's entire catalog.
58. If you start to commit suicide, and have a chance to look at your wife, you will change your mind and decide to live.
59. Peter wants Joanna to say hello to Lumberg for him.
60. Milton notices merry squirrels at work.

[–] MoviemanCin 8 years ago

61. The waiters at certain tropical resorts are very intolerant of "gringos".
62. Really fat therapists are prone to dying of heart attacks in the middle of therapy.
63. If you sleep all day Saturday when you're supposed to be at work you'll receive 17 messages, most of them from you loathsome boss.
64. Milton apparently does not own a pair of shorts.
65. If Peter works his ass off, Initech ships a few extra units.
66. Peter has eight bosses.
67. The Swingline stapler doesn't bind up as much.
68. Peter uses the side door to enter work.
69. Initech has a roach problem.
70. At the 7-11 you take a penny from the tray.
71. If you go to prison you have to watch out for your cornhole.
72. There are a lot of scumbags standing in line at the state unemployment office.

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar and doesn't.

[–] Redart27 8 years ago

73. T.P.S. Reports are put to best use as fish gut blotters
74. The Bobs love Michael Bolton's entire catalogue, and slackers
75. For lunch, the choice is either Chilis, Chotchkies of Flingers
76. The uniforms are nicer at Flingers, everything is nicer at Flingers
77. Somewhere on cable there is a breast exam demo
78. Red swingline staplers are semi-fire proof
79. If you are late for work, duck in the back door so Lumbergh won't see you
80. Repair men cannot feel it when you lift a drill out of their back pocket

Books has no sound

[–] yesanything 8 years ago

Lawrence REALLY wants to get it one with two chicks

~~the coins in the jar are for charity,~~
~~the coins in the tray are for sharing~~

[–] yesanything 8 years ago

Flinger's has nicer uniforms than Chotchkie's

~~the coins in the jar are for charity,~~
~~the coins in the tray are for sharing~~

[–] yesanything 8 years ago

A software engineer can make more money selling magazines subscriptions than working at Inertrode.

~~the coins in the jar are for charity,~~
~~the coins in the tray are for sharing~~

[–] MoviemanCin 8 years ago

Yesanything,
Ooooohhh, I'm gonna have to go ahead and ask you to come into work on Saturday since you didn't number your things we learned from Office Space. They would be 81 through 83. Oh yeah, and I'm gonna have to have you come in on Sunday also.

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar and doesn't.

[–] yesanything 8 years ago

Indeed I shall.
Though not a newbie to IMDB, this was one convention I was unaware of, will rectify starting Monday along with my TPS reports.

~~the coins in the jar are for charity,~~
~~the coins in the tray are for sharing~~

[–] MoviemanCin 8 years ago

Yeeeeaaaahhhhh....okay. But be sure to use the new cover sheet for your TPS reports.

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar and doesn't.

[–] Gadare 8 years ago

I just watched the film all the way through for the first time. Yeah, I'm slow on some things. I'm very mixed about the movie. That expectations thing, I guess.

What I find fascinating about this thread is that the original poster seems cynical about "Office Space" and is pointing out some of the plot point that were rather unbelievable. The the later posts seem to be celebrating the good lines and funny situations in the movie.

The fans took over from the guys trying to tear it down. Correct me if I'm right.

"Victor, what are we going to do to stop this fiendish tit?"

[–] Leonard82 8 years ago

What I find fascinating about this thread is that the original poster seems cynical about "Office Space" and is pointing out some of the plot point that were rather unbelievable. The the later posts seem to be celebrating the good lines and funny situations in the movie.

The fans took over from the guys trying to tear it down. Correct me if I'm right.

Obviously the movie is about people who hate their jobs (immensely). I don't think that an emphasis on that regard tears down the movie. The particular scenes that point out this theme to the extreme are presented in a very humorous and absurd way with all the gangster rap alternated with laidback music.

[–] Gadare 8 years ago

I appreciate that and have lived in that trap of hating a job but needing it at the same time.

Usually, however, when an IMDB member posts "Ten Things I Learned From....." it's to denigrate the logic lapses of the script and film, generally with serious films.

"Victor, what are we going to do to stop this fiendish tit?"

[–] Leonard82 8 years ago

I'm sorry to hear that you had to suffer your job. A change of working environment can bring miracles. Hopefully things have settled down for you.

In case of the (giant) leaps in logic, I think that such (unrealistic) exaggerations really contribute to the hilarious absurdness, especially in Office space. They work out really well IMO.

[–] MoviemanCin 8 years ago

Yeeeaaahhhhhhh.....

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar and doesn't.

[–] spambag 7 years ago

I won't correct you if you are right, but I will agree with you if you are wrong.

[–] yesanything 7 years ago

82. You don't need a million bucks to sit around and do nothing

~~the coins in the jar are for charity,~~
~~the coins in the tray are for sharing~~