Why is everyone blaming the wife for his behavior?

I agree that she's not a perfect person and that she probably handled the situation with poor judgment. But it amazes me to see how many people want to hold his wife responsible for his misfortunes and eventual breakdown, when it was made clear that he was an individual with obsessive behavior and flew into a rage over trivial things. The movie made it quite clear that he was like this probably before they met, and yet everyone is blaming her for ruining him and causing him to have an emotional breakdown, when he was incapable of seeing that he was the one causing distress to himself and instead preferred to blame everyone, including his wife. He didn't realize that she didn't want to see him again because of HIS behavior.

The sad thing is that this is how it often is in reality. Someone gets into a relationship with an emotionally unstable person, and if they freak you out, it usually gets to the point where you are afraid enough to become selfish and not only do you want any contact with them at all, but you hate and despise them. The break-up of the family unit was real life.