How about the lines...
Tom: (As beginning credits start)"Hey the end credits, horrible movie but at leaste it's short"
Mike:"No these are the beginning credits"
Tom: "Oh well then kill me please"
Mike: (At beginning when Mr.Mcready is showing the dweeby security guard around) "He's really my mentor. He showed me how to truly love a woman from accross the street, through a telescope".
When the band is singing "Pig sticker" or whatever it was, Tom says some funny lines to the melody of the song like: "Let me tell you about our 3 specials tonight", "While I'm up here let me point out the restroom", "Don't park in the ally or you'll get towed"
Roadrash: "My bike's right outside"
Mike: "Yeah, it's a ten speed"
Slutty twig girl: (When boyfriend enters) "Everybody have sex tonight" to Wang Chung's "Everybody Have Fun Tonight"
Tom:"Everybody throw up tonight"
Crow:"Ironcally no-one in the band Wang Chung had sex that night"
When the two main losers are rake fighting
Mike: "Wow the suspense is killing me. Will they water their lawn?"
When the hooker shows up
Tom: "Mike if I run out of vomit can I borrow some of your's?"
When the slutty twig girl asks where Rick is and a hobgoblin attacks her
Tom: "Who is this Rick? Is there another man in your life?"
Roadrash: (In front of club)"Okay, youre all friends of Daphnie's?"
Crow: "Youre complete scum get in here."
When Rick's van first pulls up to the house
Mike : "Scram it's the owner of the house, we have to shoot this movie somewhere else."
slutty twig girl: "Ricks been away at Army training camp for 2 months and you know what a man wants after 2 months"
Rick: (While girating his croth)"Whohoooo"
Tom:" Belly-dancing lessons?"
Club announcer:(when girl is stripping)"Well, is she a hit or a miss?"
Roadrash: holds up sign saying "Hit"
Crow: "They should really add an S to that"
Tom: "This is the type of girl you take home to meet mother, if mother is a cigaretty retired hooker".
When camara zooms in on rowdy crowd at strip club
Tom:"The lesser Kennedies out on the town"
When the fruity announcer and the huge haired waitress start to make out
Crow: "I can't tell who's getting the worse of it here"
Fruity announcer at club: "Oh, Im sorry the donkey mud wresters have to use the rear entrance"
Tom: "Well youre the expert at that"
Mr Mcready: "Come on it's time to make our rounds"
Mike: "Oh,theyre doctors."
When Kevin sees Mr. Mcready get grabbed by burglar
Mike: "I don't like the old guy getting killed channel"
As burglar puts Mr.Mcready in head-lock
Mike: "I didn't like the way you greeted me at Walmart"
When hobgoblins are trying to escape the house and the characters are holding door shut from outside
Tom: "Look we'll take your literature but we're really trying to watch our show now"
When slutty twig girl is standing outside
Crow: "Is that a praying mantis in a party dress? Oh wait it's her"
When slutty twig girl enters the house looking ragged and beat up after fighting a hobgoblin
Crow: "After my date with Prince, I went right home"
Man I loved this episode, if any episode deserves to be on DVD it's this one. Here's hoping that they do release this one in a box set next year
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opiv420
20 years ago
The old security guard is showing the guy around:
"Now let me tell you about my problematic urethra."
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whitesnake1985
20 years ago
lets not forget the old security guard showing the main loser around and Tom saying "You should know you'll have to apply a series of ointments to me regularly".
When evil hooker pushes car over a cliff while wearing tight spandex
Crow:"That's not a woman that's David Lee Roth".
the old security guard showing the first jerk around
Tom:"He's the abusive grampa I never had"
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cwells76
20 years ago
Tom: "Mike, if I run out of vomit can I borrow some of yours?"
During the garden rake fight scene:
Mike: "Yeah I would've switched to the weed wacker by now"
Crow: "Throw miricle grow in his eyes!"
Mike: "Wheewh, Jezz the tension! I mean WILL they water their grass?"
Mike: "There! Did you see that? The hose just out-acted him"
When the Hobgolbins attack them on the couch
Crow "Ah! Someone's rubbing puppets on us!"
Tom "If you just let go they'll hit the floor."
When Nick runs from the attack to his van.
Mike: "Ah, so Nick's in the French army."
After the Hobgolbin attack, and they seem unusally lethargic.
Mike: "What did they split a keg of Robitussin?"
When the slightly feminine greeter at Club Scum says: "Oh I'm sorry, but the donkey mudwrestlers are supposed to use the REAR ENTRANCE."
Crow: "Well you're the expert on that.."
Tom: "Hey look! That guy tipped his own table over... He did it again!... and yet again!"
When Nick bursts into flames like the Human torch.
Mike "My fajita plate was really hot and I touched it!"
Crow: "It's OK guys, luckily I wore my flame suit and jellied my skin today. No problem.."
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