1. The villain is a white male evil industrialist who’s polluting the land
2. The original theme music is not used
3. Solo and Kuryakin get their butts kicked by a female
4. Solo and Kuryakin eschew violence and instead try to reason with the enemy
5. No cool weapons
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dr d doak, you made me think of two more ways to ruin a new "Man from U.N.C.L.E. movie:
6. The movie is more of a comedy than a serious spy movie.
7. Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson are the stars.
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I saw it. *** Spoilers below! ***
It was disappointing to me. I only saw it once, when it played on TV in 1983. Kuryakin was working as a fashion designer. Solo was an investment banker, I think. They were called out of retirement to save the world. The running joke was that they were both getting old and weak. A line that kept coming up was "We wouldn't have done it this way 15 years ago", or something like that. I seem to recall that it was more tongue-in-cheek than a serious movie. I really liked the series when I watched it in the 60's (the first couple of seasons, anyway - after that it got silly), and I was really looking forward to the movie.
I could be that my tastes changed in 15 years, I don't know. The reviewer's comments for this movie seemed pretty good.
Maybe I'm being too hard on the movie. You might like it. I hope I didn't ruin it for you if you ever do see it!
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One night I was watching TV. A commercial came on: a older, distinguished-looking man wearing suspenders was saying "Have you been the victim of whiplash? Or involved in a class-action lawsuit? Attorney Joe Blow can help!"
The man was Robert Vaughn.
I yelled at my wife, "Look! Napoleon Solo's retired, and is shilling for some shyster lawyer!!!"
What a sad day that was.
I suppose Illya's working at Jiffy Lube. Or collecting bottles in Central Park.
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Nope... Ilya K. went bad, and tried to kill James Bond (George Lazenby, who also appears in the "15 Years Later Affair" as Bond) as revealed in an episode
of Lee Van Cleef's old TV show "The Master".
"I suppose Illya's working at Jiffy Lube. Or collecting bottles in Central Park."
Actually, "Illya" is one of the stars of the hit Mark Harmon TV series NCIS.
Actually they make reference to that in an episode.. Mark Harmon's character has the line "He always reminded me of Illya Kuryakin" in reference to David's character..
shareactual exchange from the NCIS second season ep The Meat Puzzle:
"Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: Gibbs? What did Ducky look like when he was younger?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [straight-faced] Illya Kuryakin."
I laughed my a$$ off at that.
The Maharishi says "Never drink champagne from a paper cup." - Linc Hayes
Also Robert Vaughn has been busy as well most recently playing master grifter Albert Stoller on the BBC series "Hustle"---
shareROFLMFAO!
Oh my, was that funny! You're right...Robert Vaughn indeed does "shill" for some Ambulance chaser.
I think the reason David McCallum's career stayed strong is that he moved on to movies, while Vaughn's choices (hello...THE PROTECTORS???) seemed less about good career moves, and more about keeping a pay cheque.
As hard as I laughed at your posting, it was kinda sad when I saw Vaughn reduced to educating people to tell your insurance company "you mean business!"
Robert Vaughn is in "Hustle". You may catch that on AMC (Wednesdays 10:00 p.m.) or on People + Arts (daily around 3-ish I think). I like Hustle and I was happy to see him there...
I remember the commercial you are talking about. I was thinking he hit rock bottom. He has not gotten many good roles after Superman III. That's not a dig at that movie, I like him in it and I loved the movie a lot.
shareAw, man, as much as I love the pair (and the rest of the new frat pack), I just don't see that happening with my approval. Bond is a frickin' pansy compared to the two (They're the Crockett & Tubbs of the old days), and Stiller/Wilson would (whilst being funny as hell, I suppose) screw with that image.
share"Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson are the stars."
Brother, that's a good way to ruin ANY movie!!!!
Ain't it the truth! Stiller and Wilson are both pretty good actors (Owen is better IMHO) but their movies together are weak. I can see some pinheads in Tinseltown already plotting to ruin the next UNCLE project.
shareThanks for that great post. I could not agree more with your five ways to ruin a new movie. But you know with Hollywood you're odds are to get four out of thos five if they ever remake it.
shareI would argue about the "no cool weapons". The new U.N.C.L.E. special, a modified HK P-7, was pretty cool; but, you can barely see it in the movie. Solo carries it during the climactic assault on THRUSH, but it never gets a good close-up. I do remember it being featured in a tv listing article, before broadcast. It was also the source of a write-up in a gun magazine, featuring the original and the new. They cobbled together a barrel extension and silencer, like the P-38; but the scope/sighting system was more streamlined (snug against the upper receiver) and instead of a shoulder stock, it featured an arm brace.
There was talk of a motion picture in the late 70's/early 80's, but this was all that materialized.
Get Shia LeBeouf in as Solo!
Its that man again!!
Yeah-Shia LaBeouf as Solo,Justin Bieber as Kuryakin and a female boss-Mrs Waverly.
How I dread that some suit reads this and thinks"Hey-that could work!"Lets hope we NEVER get an U.n.c.l.e. reboot-it will be swamped with political correctness,feminism,gay rights,green issues,etc.My heart always sinks when I hear of some old show or movie being"brought up to date"ie-ruined.You can just picture it-the main villain will be white and male(only male whites are capable of evil),his organisation of thugs will be persecuting some innocent blacks\muslims,polluting the country they live in and destroying the environment,etc.Only Solo and Kuryakin-with their new feisty female partner(who is also a lesbian)-can foil the dastardly plan.Once they get their orders from their black female boss,they jump into a Toyota Prius and leap into action in an environmentally-friendly fashion.And the U.n.c.l.e. headquarters wont be in some shop,it will be in a gay bar.Cue bikers in leather with bushy mustaches-and the men will look the same....
OP was nineteen years ago. Now (2024) Solo would be a black lesbian, and Kuryakin would be trans.
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