MovieChat Forums > Diamonds Are Forever (1971) Discussion > Ridiculous things in the movie

Ridiculous things in the movie


Ridiculous things in the movie that made you roll your eyes or laugh unintentionally.

For me, the fingerprint light board in the back of Tiffany Chase's closet. Because, you know, you always want to keep track of the fingerprints of everyone who comes into your home, people aren't always who they claim to be. I was laughing the whole scene. They could not have been serious.

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The moon actors moving in slow motion and the man on the ATV waiting for Bond to attack.

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that monn scene was strange as the astronauts walked slowly as if on the moon but Bond just ran normally, maybe it was the weight of the suits

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many people dont get that scene, back then many people doubted where we landed on the moon or faked it,especially some british reporters, this was their little jab at that.

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This is a rather odd thing. Back in the '70s almost nobody believed the moon landings were faked. It was a VERY fringe notion. It took most of half a century and the odd effect of the internet--allowing easier communication and making all points of vie appear to have equal value--for this to become a serious conspiracy theory. And I do know how insane the concept is, but flat Earth is no longer just a joke either.
Back when the film came out I and my friends understood the moonscape sequence to be some sort of over-complicated simulation used for training and testing devices like the moon buggy.

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correct , and I really doubt it was "some british reporters"
You need full on yankee nut job mentality for that kind of conspiracy nonsense

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For me, the fingerprint light board in the back of Tiffany Chase's closet. Because, you know, you always want to keep track of the fingerprints of everyone who comes into your home, people aren't always who they claim to be. I was laughing the whole scene. They could not have been serious. - cooler56

Tiffany Case (not Chase--perhaps you missed the joke about her being born outside Tiffany's jewelry store) is part of the diamond-smuggling operation, and when Bond comes to visit her, he is posing as a courier. So, the fingerprint kit made sense for her to verify identities. There have been many more ridiculous things in a Bond film besides this one, which I maintain isn't ridiculous at all.
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"Man becomes the food of the divinity he worships." - Chris Stevens

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Agreed, it's no more ridiculous than anything else in the Bond series. That being said, for anyone with any knowledge about fingerprints to have two prints match exactly like that is laughable, not to mention that the print itself is not what an actual print looks like, it looks like two prints that have been spliced together or someone with a huge scar on their finger.

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That being said, for anyone with any knowledge about fingerprints to have two prints match exactly like that is laughable, not to mention that the print itself is not what an actual print looks like, it looks like two prints that have been spliced together or someone with a huge scar on their finger. - baheidstu-351-733122

Good point. But any element in any film can be challenged by an expert in that field as not being accurate or authentic.

However, movies are not made for subject-matter experts. They are made for general audiences. So, the concern is to make it look plausible to an audience of laypersons.

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"We hear very little, and we understand even less." - Refugee in Casablanca

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But the fingerprint-checker thing is enormous...just for that one moment of checking his I.D. She has to get the thing into that flat and out again when they ditch the place.

It just looks very low-tech for one film moment. It's the worst of film-Bond storytelling: when an ostentatious device has just one apparent function...the one needed just then by the story.

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Free your mind and the rest will follow

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The freakin elephant winning at slots by getting three elephants was the stupidest moment in any of the Connery films.

There were a lot of genuinely hilarious moments though... BLOW UP YOUR PANTS!!!

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That WAS a hilarious moment..also the woman who turns into a gorilla, this movie had too many sideshows in it.

An unintentional laugh was when Connery had his voice altered to be the thug on the phone with Blofeld -

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The voice altering moment was rather cool.

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And having Q remark that he built one for the kids (grandkids, perhaps?) the previous Christmas added a nice touch. It's exactly what you'd expect a dedicated gadget master to do in his spare time!

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And He has on His robe and on His thigh a name written:KING OF KINGS AND LORD OF LORDS.

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That WAS a hilarious moment..also the woman who turns into a gorilla, this movie had too many sideshows in it.


Actually, I've seen that trick done in a carnival, and the way you see it in the movie is exactly the way it looks. It's done with mirrors.



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The scene where they use the scorpion to kill the smuggler.

Firstly the scorpion used is an Emperor which has the venom of a bee sting.
Secondly even the worlds most poisonous scorpions wouldn't cause instant death, it would take at least a few hours.

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Anything with mr wint and mr kidd

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Pedantic for sure, but brilliantly put sir.

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SPOILERS below.

I certainly don't watch these old Bond movies for their logic and realism. I enjoy them despite, or maybe because of, their flaws and anachronisms, which are always fun to pick on. Diamonds Are Forever has a lot of intentional comedy - among my favorite bits are when Jill St. John shoots the submachine gun and it makes her bounce and jiggle backwards and fall into the ocean, the fake moon landing with the pretend slow-motion astronauts and the fast Bond, the giant transparent bed full of little fish, the woman turning into a gorilla, the elephant winning a slot machine with three elephants, Q's ring that makes slot machines pay off, the comments of the "gay" duo Mr. Kidd and Mr. Wint, and especially Mr. Kidd's absurd forehead comb-over!, and all of the sexy double entendres - but there are also lots of ridiculous and unintentionally funny things in the movie that include many of the same sorts of things that were ridiculed in the Austin Powers movies years ago:

Why did they tell Bond their plans and how their system operated then let him wander around their satellite command center? They didn't even handcuff him!

Mr. Kidd and Mr. Wint were ridiculous assassins - they use a scorpion to kill a man, which worked, but then they ineptly try to kill Bond by incinerating him in a coffin and walking away instead of shooting him, then they ineptly try to bury him alive in a pipe and walking away instead of shooting him, then they absurdly try to kill him with a bomb in a cake instead of just shooting him. Maybe they were proponents of strict gun control.

It's absurd how Bond, who is held down by Bambi and Thumper, suddenly manages to get above water and then hold down their heads and all of a sudden they lose their strength and can't just swim out from under his hands.

Kicking a cat to make it run to its owner? That might just be the most absurd thing in the whole movie - that a cat would be that loyal to its owner, or even recognize the owner. The screenwriter obviously never had a pet cat.

Much of the invented technology was ridiculous: the fake fingerpring; the voice altering machines; the gun that shoots a piton into hardened concrete that can hold Bond's entire weight; the giant space laser aimed at the earth with enough accuracy to blow up missiles, Q's slot machine fixing ring (funny but not believable.)

The entire quickly-made-up plan to smuggle diamonds inside a corpse, then take it to a funeral home, transfer it to a different coffin, burn the coffin and the corpse to reclaim the diamonds, then give Bond an urn full of diamonds and ask him to put them behind a curtain - and he didn't even notice the two men nearby. That is way too complicated and stupid a plan and Bond was a fool to get knocked out, even though he knew the diamonds were fake. And how would fake glass diamonds survive the intense heat that burned the corpse and the coffin in only a couple of minutes?

Using plastic surgery on various men so they look like Bloefeld so Bond will kill them by mistake instead of Bloefeld. It seems to make twisted sense, but seriously, it's a very ridiculous idea.





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--Mr. Kidd and Mr. Wint were ridiculous assassins - they use a scorpion to kill a man, which worked, but then they ineptly try to kill Bond by incinerating him in a coffin and walking away instead of shooting him, then they ineptly try to bury him alive in a pipe and walking away instead of shooting him, then they absurdly try to kill him with a bomb in a cake instead of just shooting him. Maybe they were proponents of strict gun control.--

They wanted it to look like a freak crematory/pipeline/gourmet cooking accident.


--Kicking a cat to make it run to its owner? That might just be the most absurd thing in the whole movie - that a cat would be that loyal toits owner, or even recognize the owner. The screenwriter obviously never had a pet cat.--

I thought he'd kicked the cat into Blofeld's arms but yeah, that wouldn't be cat behavior. See 'You Only Live Twice' when the fireworks start and that cat is squirming in Blofeld's arms like 'forget this, I'm outa here!'

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I honestly think this movie would have made a better spoof of The Bond Series than the mess of a movie that was Casino Royal the came out a few years earlier.

Like I know Roger Moore played the James Bond role lighter or whatever. But after watching this movie in the first time in forever it seems like the series was heading in that direction anyway before Moore showed up. It's just things got ever more ridiculous in Live and Let Die... but at least in a cool way.

Like others pointed out Mr. Kidd & Mr. Wint were ridiculous henchmen. But I thought they were hilarious. SPECTRE must have been in really rough shape since Blofeld didn't just kill them for not being able to kill Bond.

There was the deal where they messed up with what side the car was leaning when it went of the alley way so they have it switch while in the alley!

Oh and for whatever reason Blofeld felt the need to cross dress to capture Case.

This movie is great for laughs but it's honestly such a let down as a follow up to On Her Majesty's Secret Service.

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he cross dressed to escape the Feds who were hunting him; Case basically kidnapped herself for being too damn nozy

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and walking away instead of shooting him

A staple of nearly all bond films surely.

"Begin the unnacasarily slow dipping mechanism!"

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The Elephant playing the slots is by far the strangest things I've seen on a James Bond movie.

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"I got a brudda..."
"You wanna ride in the front Mr Franks?"
-"It's a more comfortable ride in the front Mr Franks."

Lol

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You people are far too picky and judgmental. This movie was great fun.

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When another installment in a series is released . . especially a series with 24 entries . . it's inevitable to compare the various installments. I agree people can be too nitpicky about certain things, but it doesn't make much sense to just shrug and say "Well, it's another Bond movie! No need to care if it's actually any good."

I got the latest Bond box set for Christmas, and am working my way through all of them. I just finished DAF, and have to conclude it's the worst of the bunch. Is it still "fun"? Sure, at times. But that's almost the problem. They seem to be "just having fun" while making the movie, and it comes off as a precursor to Austin Powers.

I know intellectually that Bond movies are ridiculous, but I have always enjoyed them more when they're pretending to be serious. Occasional winks at the audience are fine, but this movie was one two-hour wink.

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I have meddled with the primal forces of nature and I will atone.

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