If you think back to the beginning of the movie, we got to see both George and Brad at the start of the day as their wives headed out to chaperone the picnic. They were both going out that day too. We did not see Porter but we heard from Rita that he was spotted at the station heading into town. He was in such a rush he nearly knocked her over. According to her, Lora Mae did not know.
All three of the husbands were spending that Saturday in an uncharacteristic way but Brad is the only one of the three that had specifically told his wife his plans. Deborah even knew ahead of time that he might not get back that night so she'd have to go to the dinner/dance without him. She's the one who asked him to call and leave a message letting her know whether or not he'd be back.
Deborah was already preoccupied with Addie. She felt as the outsider she didn't fit into the group. The others had all been friends for a long time; some since childhood, with Brad and Addie having been particularly close. The letter from Addie to the wives and her flashback only made things worse. When she got Brad's message, the fact it had been left by an unspecified woman didn't help. She imagined Addie was that woman. Sure, it's possible Brad could have been lying to her but the only problem these two had was due to Deborah's insecurities not Brad's actions. We (and she) never had any reason to doubt him. Whatever romantic feelings Brad may have had for Addie, had long since evaporated.
Neither of the other two wives knew what their husbands were doing that day. They also they had rockier marriages so they did have some reason to worry. In Rita's case, George had tried to tell her his news in advance but never got around to it. Then that day, for whatever reason, they weren't speaking. She hadn't even noticed, until Deborah told her, that he was wearing a suit and wasn't planning to go fishing as was his Saturday routine.
Technically, George left the house before Rita. She should have noticed he left without any baggage. If he was going to run off with Addie he'd need a few things yet he was empty-handed. Addie, as we heard, had planned her departure. She relinquished her apartment, sold her car, and had no plans of coming back. Whichever husband was leaving with her would have been going for good and would likely have packed some basic essentials - at the very least.
Besides, George isn't as 'taken' with Addie. He's a proud, outspoken teacher with a meager income. His wife makes the real money in that family. He's not thrilled but accepts the situation and makes light of it. He's content in his life; otherwise he'd have jumped at the chance to do something that paid more like the job Rita tried to arrange for him. What he wants is for her to stop morphing into something else. If there had been any doubts about George, those were quickly settled once Rita got home; not only was he already there, his whereabouts for that day were fully explained.
I suppose this is why the director was surprised at the confusion. It all seems fairly clear that the only husband who would consider running off with Addie is Porter. He meets all the conditions:
- He idolizes and is obsessed with her.
- He's in a difficult, unhappy marriage.
- He was spotted at the station, in a hurry, with a lot on his mind.
- Lora Mae had no idea where he was that day or what he was supposed to be doing.
- He's a big time business man in the process of going national. He goes to town often and could easily relocate there but it's Saturday; that's not typical for his business.
- He could have easily arranged to have his things sent to him wherever he goes or he could afford to leave empty-handed and buy whatever he needs later.
- He's very late getting home yet provides no explanation for his tardiness.
What we all (the wives included) should notice by the end of the movie is that Addie's not all she's cracked up to be. She's probably one of these people who seem a lot better from a distance, sitting up on a pedestal, than she actually is. Up close and personal, people see her for what she is; all the flaws and thorns show through and the 'class' melts away. This would explain why her own husband up and left her abruptly and without explanation.
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