MovieChat Forums > Insecure (2016) Discussion > They all screwed themselves royally....

They all screwed themselves royally....

posted 7 years ago by MsCurlsNCurves
6 replies | jump to latest

There's so much I want to see about this series but I'll just stick to the main plot of the relationships for now since that seems to be the biggest elephant in the room...

My friends have been raving about the show since it ended...one even created an event somewhere in ATL just so people could get together and discuss the show....meh...I was feeling VERY underwhelmed but regardless this show does raise a lot of questions and topics to be discussed. All are my friends are taking sides with the #TeamDaniel #TeamLawrence....etc...

I think my biggest problem is that why should these 2 men even vy for someone like Issa? I get it...she's the main character but in the real world she would've been dropped with a quickness.

My biggest issue is that I feel like Issa only stayed in the relationship because she had already committed so much time to it and with her being on the edge of 30 didn't want to start over...although women do it every day after decades of a relationship/marriage but I digress...I think she really needs to question if she truly loves Lawrence or just has strong emotions for him since they've been together for so long. She was unhappy with his employment status (which I will touch on) and doesn't even believe in his dreams. How can you be with someone and not believe in their dreams?? His dream was realistic and attainable but he simply allowed any and all obstacles to slow him down. I firmly don't believe in staying in a relationship for any reason...especially if you're not even married...you wasted 5 years? So what? Why continue to waste 5 More years?? She let things continue on for far too long until Lawrence became super attached to her (Note their somewhat almost break up in the beginning). Hell she didn't even want to honestly try at the relationship until after she cheated....how nice...I wonder how she would've felt if the roles were reversed. She also set herself up by going to studio with Daniel...once she decided to stay after everyone left the inevitable was sure to happen.

Poor Daniel, I feel like a lot of people .ake him the bad guy like he was just some stranger/random that lured Issa to cheat. But it's clear they have history...been friends since high school or younger and def had something going on in college. Issa even states he's the "what if" guy. I think Daniel does have feelings for Issa or else he wouldn't have been hurt the way he was. If he wanted to make trouble he most certainly could've turned Issa's world upside down...but he was respectful to her even after she dodged his calls and called him an itch she needed to scratch...smh...kudos to him! But he still screwed hisself. He knew Issa had a boyfriend so I don't know why he's blowing up her phone as if their affair was not considered cheating. He can't be THAT clueless...

Lastly, Lawrence...a lot of people pity him and view him as the victim but I'm seeing right through it. Number 1, how does he go so long without a real job?? I can't remember how long they said...I feel like it was 3-4 years but I'm sure Unemployment wouldn't run that long so I'm hoping at most 1 year...which is still a long time. I get it, the job market is hard and he's looking for a certain type of job but he should know the corporate world is cutthroat. You must have your I's dotted and your T's crossed. Im surprised he even got interviews with the gaps in his employment. His headhunter was right, he should've gotten an entry level job, shined bright like a diamond and moved his way up. The "Donald Trump" effect only comes once in a blue moon. But no, he stayed his behind at home and did what???? He says he wants to launch his app....you have ALL this time...ain't that many obstacles in the world. It's not like you're buried with work from a real job. The biggest joke is that instead of getting an entry level job at a good company he goes to Best Buy....errmmm....okay cool. A job is a job. I think that both he and Issa should've had more communication in their relationship. Every time he brings up his app Issa gets all monotone and annoyed. Ask her why! Understand why she can't believe in him and either make her believe or bounce! It's amazing they've been together for so long walking around on eggshells and tiptoeing around certain issues. I think the thing that really surprised me (most others) is the finale. His petty a** called up Issa, got her hopes up, then packed all his stuff and banged the small intestines out of another chick (possibly in their apartment). Lawrence got some petty to him and for a girl like Issa...that won't sit well. He's not so much of a sucker as people think. Furious sex my a** he was being straight petty.

I honestly don't want them to her back together...in all honesty Issa needs to get herself together (perhaps go to therapy) and work out a few things because not only is her relationship/friendships failing but so is her job (although she stepped up quite a bit near the end). But since every TV show MUST have a romance....I'm gonna have to go with Daniel for now....at least until we can learn more about him....

[Sorry for any mistakes, my autocorrect has a mind of its own]

[–] Darkside7 7 years ago

SMH.

Paragraphs full of bullsh*t.

Then again, I read it all so I'm just as full of bullsh*t for doing so.

[–] MsCurlsNCurves 7 years ago

Add some extra points for that unnecessary a*s comment.

Either agree, disagree, or move on.

[–] ChocolateButt 7 years ago

I'm with your friends. Love the show. Other than that there's not much to disagree with. Issa was with Lawrence mostly because it felt comfortable. Daniel was genuinely into her (and it's his own fault he got hurt- don't fck with people in relationships).

As for Lawrence being petty...I don't know. I think I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. His self-esteem took a hit, he felt betrayed by someone he trusted, and he wanted to feel good again. Tasha the Teller gave him validation so he went to her.

"What race are you? If you don't tell me I'll just...assume the worst."

[–] exatera 7 years ago

My biggest issue is that I feel like Issa only stayed in the relationship because she had already committed so much time to it and with her being on the edge of 30 didn't want to start over...although women do it every day after decades of a relationship/marriage

And men, too. After a number of years, people get invested, the relationship is not that easy to leave. They can't imagine starting up again with someone completely new, going through the hellish process of dating, and so on. Especially when they share their residence and finances, etc., but mostly it's inertia and fear of the unknown.

I think she really needs to question if she truly loves Lawrence

She does not. I never believed that for a second while watching the show.

And one of the reasons for that was what you mentioned below:

It's amazing they've been together for so long walking around on eggshells and tiptoeing around certain issues.

They are not close! There isn't even a hint of emotional intimacy to their relationship (the way it's portrayed on the show, at least), they are like two strangers living together. To say that they aren't the most connected couple would be an understatement.

I think Daniel does have feelings for Issa or else he wouldn't have been hurt the way he was.

I think Daniel's character wasn't well-written in that he was inconsistent and kind of all over the place. He was the one who initially asked Issa, "Relationship?? Who said anything about a relationship?", but then suddenly "caught feelings" after they had sex.
I would think that if the guy had admitted to some real feelings for her in the first place, Issa wouldn't have cheated on Lawrence with him so thoughtlessly.

Agree with everything you said about Lawrence, at least regarding the job situation. Yes, it sounded like it's been years, and btw, considering that LA is an expensive city, I wonder how they even survived for that long on whatever Issa makes at her non-profit, which can't be much. He just strikes me as aimless, lacking focus, and undisciplined.

It's unbelievable to me that Issa never gave him any sort of deadline, or held him accountable by monitoring the progress he's made on his app somehow (I mean, it's been years!), etc. That seems hardly realistic, how he could just afford to keep living this way indefinitely.

[–] geradersond 7 years ago

It was possible that she loved Lawrence but was disappointed in his performance at the time (employment, intimacy, motivation). Relationships have ups and downs, that's why they say you have to weather through the storms because although you love your partner, you will not always be happy with them. Issa and Lawrence not close when the series begins because Issa is distancing herself to explore possibilities with Daniel. It's obvious that Issa and Daniel had pattern, which they quickly return to when they reconnect. He liked her but wasn't willing to put himself on there for commitment while she wanted that commitment and didn't take him seriously. Sounds like they were both too afraid to make the first move toward commitment for fear of being hurt or some other reason. I can understand that when they reconnect after five years, Daniel is unwilling to just jump right into a relationship, whereas Issa is ready to start where they left off. His reaction makes sense to me, and then he had a chance to reflect and does not want to miss the opportunity he missed years ago. But I think you are right, "I would think that if the guy had admitted to some real feelings for her in the first place, Issa wouldn't have cheated on Lawrence with him so thoughtlessly." I think Issa didn't want to let go of Lawrence for something so uncertain.

I think Issa and Lawrence survived in LA because it looked like they lived in a part of the city called "the jungle." or somewhere close. There are tons of apartment buildings and it's not the best neighborhood and but the rent is more reasonable there. Plus, Lawrence did have some income in the form of his unemployment check. Depending on how much you earn, there is a sweet spot in which your unemployment income equals the amount of your take-home pay when you were working.

[–] geradersond 7 years ago

I just got caught up on Amazon. I loved ABG but did not have cable to access HBO. I am not Team Lawrence or Team Daniel. And let's face it, men vie for women like Issa all the time. As one who relates to Issa, I can tell you why I think that is so. I also grew up in a middle-class neighborhood and being an awkward, black girl but mine was not predominantly black like Issa's. This means being exposed to things of the world (like good sushi), but I am not bourgeoisie like Issa's friends, Tiffany and Molly. Not being a "hood" girl, but knowing how to have fun at a house party in the hood. Men who didn't grow up in the same environment see that as different. Issa in some aspects is confident in herself and real with herself when it comes to her awkwardness and vulnerability, and that is refreshing for them. Think about it, Issa raps and says the n-word but she doesn't carry hot sauce around in her purse like Tasha. She loves kale, not trying to force herself to eat because it's healthy.

I think that Issa stayed with Lawrence because she genuinely has affection for him. Why not, he is a decent guy and very easy on the eyes. However, Daniel was strong in areas that Lawrence was not at the beginning of the season. He was successfully doing his thing in music (following his dream), he insisted that they celebrate her birthday (as well as contacted her out of blue to wish her happy birthday, which means that despite five years of no contact, he remembered), and performed more than adequately in the romance department. Lawrence got a little too complacent, hell, even his own friend interpreted that fact that he flaked out on her birthday as he "didn't get a fudge about her."

Different people's unemployment situations (amount of money you have banked) lead to different unemployment compensation outcomes. And remember Obama extended unemployment benefits during the recession. Prior to the recession, I think they had previously instituted time limits but the recession pretty much blew that out of the water. And Obama's extensions gave people access to more money than they banked. And you can extend your unemployment by getting intermittent work. I agree with you that we saw a lot of Lawrence lying around watching TV, not grinding on the app. It's not that Issa did not believe in Lawrence and his app, but four years? And every time I come home from work, you're on the couch watching TV? I am sure that can wear on your nerves after a while. She did tell him to keep the job and work on his app on nights and weekends.

Daniel is not the bad guy. What happened between him and Issa is on Issa, like he said. She was the one in the relationship. She gave him signals because she is the one that threw out the word "relationship." Daniel appears to be afraid of being hurt. He has matured, him and his pants.

Lawrence is a good guy but he must have some accountable. Bottom line, he is not responsible for Issa's cheating. I don't know where you live, but entry level jobs are not easy to come by in LA. It's not that Issa didn't even want to honestly try at the relationship until after she cheated, it's that Lawrence didn't start to "do better" until after the "somewhat almost break-up." The path to the cheating was already in motion. After Issa almost broke up with him, Lawrence got his job, Lawrence got the video removed, Lawrence started performing better in the bedroom. Lawrence put himself in an awkward situation by telling his boys about Issa's cheating, now if he returns to the relationship he will look even softer than his boy's already thinks he is. I am not sure why he thinks its important to shed his 'nice guy' image and start projecting this persona that he is not. Hopefully, he will go back to normal if he maintains a relationship with Tasha. BTW, I thnk they were in Tasha's apartment, not him and Issa's. I had to rewind the scene a couple of times to be sure.

I hope we get to learn more about Daniel, he seemed pretty affected when Issa told him that he was just an itch she needed to scratch. He might not return for more after that.