How is Gus "fake" nice? - Love (2016) Discussion

[–] Trackmaster 8 years ago

I mean, how exactly is he a "nice" guy? Because he buys her $6 worth of coffee and cigarettes? Because he's timid and awkward? I'd think that if he was truly a "nice" guy, and not just trying to impress girls, he'd be understanding with Mickey and communicate with her instead of trying to Ghost her.

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

I mean, how exactly is he a "nice" guy? Because he buys her $6 worth of coffee and cigarettes?

Yes. The very first interaction between the two of them was him being incredibly nice to a complete stranger.

I'd think that if he was truly a "nice" guy he'd be understanding with Mickey and communicate with her instead of trying to Ghost her.

When someone is $h**ty to you you don't owe them "understanding". We all have problems and Mickey has no one to blame but herself for a majority of hers. She needs to grow up and put her big girl pants instead of expecting everyone to be "understanding" of her b/c she's a pretty "addict".

You say a true nice guy would try to give her some "understanding", but I wonder if you would still be that patient with her if she weren't gorgeous? I doubt that you would. Look at how much "understanding" you are giving Gus.

How come the pretty one gets "understanding" and the nerdy unattractive one gets accused of being a jerk?

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[–] resmat-1 8 years ago

His flattery of the crew of Wichita could be considered "fake nice", especially given that he actually has a low opinion of the show.

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

Sucking up a work is completely different than being fake nice in all aspects of one's life.

I would imagine that most of us that have worked a day in our lives have probably faked a smile or pretended to laugh at an unfunny joke our boss has said. That doesn't mean we are "fake nice" to everyone we encounter outside of work.

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[–] resmat-1 8 years ago

It may be a more common example of "fake niceness" but it's an example of "fake niceness" nonetheless, and that's what the OP was asking for.

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

Do you have any others? B/c that one is a bit of a reach. And it would be ridiculously hypocritical of anyone on this board to hate him for that (something almost all of us do).

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[–] alanajemison 8 years ago

consider what his ex natalie said as well, she kept saying things with him werent working out etc and he kept smothering her with more love in spite of it... like holding her emotionally hostage with "niceness" and love. its unfair and passive aggressive because it makes her the bad guy just because she wants out, and because he keeps acting (key word) nice

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

she kept saying things with him werent working out etc and he kept smothering her with more love in spite of it... like holding her emotionally hostage with "niceness" and love.

Wow, you are really reaching. He was in love with her and wanted to make it work. There was no acting there. No fake niceness. Neither one of them were the bad guy. She was unhappy and left. He wanted to try to make it work by letting her know she was loved.

like holding her emotionally hostage with "niceness" and love.

Your brain is interesting. I disagree with it wholeheartedly, but damn, it's interesting.

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[–] shes_hollywood 8 years ago

... Paul Rust, is that you?

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Proud kamikaze woman

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

Yes, everyone that disagrees with your point of view is Paul Rust.

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[–] shes_hollywood 8 years ago

Never said I disagreed with your POV. But you vociferously assert that the only reason people dislike Gus/find Mickey tolerable or sympathetic is because: Gus (the unattractive) did the "beautiful" Mickey wrong, and if she weren't "beautiful/hot" (w/e) no one would have their current POV.

I have noticed that the theme of most of your posts bring up the question whether pertinent to the thread or no. Just an observation...

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Proud kamikaze woman

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

Yup, that doesn't make me Paul Rust.

I have noticed that the theme of most of your posts bring up the question whether pertinent to the thread or no. Just an observation...

Thank you for telling me what I say. Up until now I was unsure of my point of view. And I bring it up any time someone accuses Gus of being awful and/or Mickey is a good person who just needs some hugs and understanding.

Mickey is awful. Gus is .....eh. Gus gets dumped on all the time in these forums. People defend the hell out of Mickey and say she needs hugs and understanding.

The main difference between the two is that Mickey is a 9 and Gus is a 3.

I wonder if that has anything to do with their people's perception of the two?

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[–] nykug 8 years ago

Yeah wtf is up with this guy, he replies to like every comment.

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

Yeah, wtf is up with that guy responding to someone that responded to him. 

Is this really your big soap box moment? I'm guessing you disagree with me but don't have the ability to articulate your argument. I don't see how that's my problem. 

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[–] TwentytoOneDevotchka 7 years ago

i wholeheartedly agree with every post you have made in this thread....and theres only one Paul Rust so....... 😂

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[–] veil182 8 years ago

Haha reaching? When you are in a long term relationship it's hard in many ways to end it, especially when there isn't some big ordeal that causes it, you just realize it's over.

Natalie was trying to be strong and came to him and said she wanted to end it...Gus wasn't "trying to make it work," at least according to her. He basically just ignored her, using "niceness" as a deflection to how she was actually feeling.

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

Haha reaching?

Yes.

Natalie was trying to be strong and came to him and said she wanted to end it...Gus wasn't "trying to make it work," at least according to her.

Being strong by lying about cheating on him? That doesn't sound strong at all. It sounds pathetic. But I'm sure you'll blame Gus for her lying (and give her a free pass b/c she's pretty).

He basically just ignored her, using "niceness" as a deflection to how she was actually feeling.

No, he was just caught off guard. Being clueless isn't the same as being "fake nice".

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[–] cee_dill 8 years ago

I don't think that he's fake nice (as in it coming from an insincere place). I do think that he tries to push his niceness too far in a way that is off-putting to some. Like the scene with him and Bertie at the restaurant. He kept insisting on "improving things" for her until she was uncomfortable and unhappy (after being shown to be a pretty easygoing person). I also think that he bottles up issues in the interest of being nice to the point that when someone forces a confrontation he hits below the belt rather than dealing with the actual issues. Like when Mickey came to his party or work rather than tell her "The way that you behaved towards me hurt my feelings and I need a little space." he chose to attack her for being clingy and needy (which he certainly would not have considered an issue a few days ago).

Gus has other attributes: he's cute, funny, patient and at least passably creative, but instead he tries to rely almost entirely on being nice to get ahead.

I think both he and Mickey are genuinely good people who are trying, but they both tend to try the wrong things here and there. I'll be curious to see how they progress if they get a second season.

"Call me in about a week."
"So it could be cancer? Hey, doc. You don't be a stranger either."

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[–] patronus12 8 years ago

I agree, I think Mickey is wrong in her assessment that he is 'fake' nice. I think Gus is a genuinely nice guy. He has a big group of friends who all get along. I think Mickey knows he is genuine and that's part of why she is attracted to him.

Mickey's going through a tough time and is acting a little irrationally and maybe her judgement is a little off. I agree with you that Mickey is also a genuinely good person. Nobody will be at their best when they're going through a tough time, and anyone is prone to be self-centered and selfish when they're struggling.

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[–] jrock2310 8 years ago

well said, and I agree. also, their personalities are very different. mickey is brutally honest and gus is (more/less) passive aggressive.

gus is very non confrontational unless backed into a corner. mickey is the complete opposite.

as a once "shy guy", I often remember hearing the term "kill'em w/ kindness". and I bet that is gus moreso than "fake nice". I don't think its anything he does intentionally, its just who he is.

but that's also why I think they're attracted to each other... they're oil and water. and in relationships, that *CAN* be the balance some need.

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[–] Xenopharb (617) 6 years ago

I agree. I have a relative like that, and it makes dealing with issues difficult because he always has a nice spin on things when sometimes harsh reality is what is needed. It isn't fake, but it is overtly sincere. Gus is well written as that kind of person.

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[–] lexob9 8 years ago

if you compare two characters. Mickey just speaks her mind, always, no matter what. on the other hand Gus is more reserved. but in reality he is also a douche. thats fake nice. it seems at first that he is reserved and polite that he must be nice but in reality he is has bad temper. thats my take on this anyway

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

how so?

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[–] lexob9 8 years ago

he wasnt afraid to fight whit his gf on public. to delete he number after he was fed up with her. and many more thats all douchy things

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

he wasnt afraid to fight whit his gf on public.

that doesn't make someone "fake nice" or a jerk or a douchebag. Also it takes two people to have an argument. Why are you giving the girl a free pass?

to delete he number after he was fed up with her.

I don't see how that makes him a jerk either. I delete numbers all the time from my phone when I no longer have a desire to talk the people those numbers belong to.

and many more thats all douchy things

Like what? This should be easy since there are so many. You listed two that really weren't bad at all. I wouldn't even count them as examples.

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[–] lexob9 8 years ago

i am not giving the girl a free pass. she is just not hiding that she is not nice. but Gus is. i guess first we should define what "nice" means and then talk about "fake nice". nice guy in this situation probably wouldnt have sex with his blonde coworker and ignore person he gad sex previous night. thats not nice. and "fake" comes in because Gus has this nice guy status, he payed for her coffee when they meet without second thought and when you combine this with his not nice behavior you get "fake nice". he pretends to be a nice guy while he has sex left and right. i dont know how else to explain. if you dont agree at least say what do you not agree about: you think he's nice? or not?

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

nice guy in this situation probably wouldnt have sex with his blonde coworker and ignore person he gad sex previous night.

Couple of things, Mickey was awful to him that morning. Gus left her house that morning thinking she wasn't into him at all and that they would most likely never be a couple.

A nice guy would move on.

This is more Mickey being crazy than Gus being "fake nice".

he payed for her coffee when they meet without second thought

Which is what a nice guy would do.

and when you combine this with his not nice behavior you get "fake nice".

So what you are saying is that unless we are nice 100% of the time we are always "fake nice"? Not to be rude here, but that is pretty stupid.

and ignore person he gad sex previous night.

The same person that insulted him multiple times and said she wasn't coming to his stupid party b/c it sounded lame? That person that did end up coming to the party and kept bashing it while she was there? That person? I'm sorry, but that person deserves to be ignored.

he pretends to be a nice guy while he has sex left and right.

In the show he slept with his fiance (which nice people do). After the break up he went out with Mickey and they slept together. She treated him like garbage and he moved on to the nice girl from work that was genuinely into him. I fail to see how this makes him "fake nice".

And correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe that Mickey and Gus slept with the same number of people during the series (3 each). I believe Mickey even slept with her boss. I can't imagine what nice things you'd be saying about Gus if he had done that.

if you dont agree at least say what do you not agree about:

Done and done.

you think he's nice? or not?

I think he's a fairly nice person. Certainly not "fake nice". He's not perfect, but he's much nicer than Mickey.

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[–] Cyraxote 8 years ago

Yeah, I just don't get why she gets a pass for being bitchy because she's up-front about it. She's still bitchy, and she KNOWS she's bitchy, and yet she makes no attempt to be anything but bitchy. I was in a relationship with a woman like that for a long time, and it got really old. She said it was about being "authentic," that she shouldn't have to put on her "work face" around me. I said, "So basically, you treat the people you work with better than the person you say you love." Maybe this is what people mean about Gus being "fake" nice: the fact that he doesn't follow every impulse the moment he has it makes him "inauthentic." Gus makes an attempt to curb his impulses, probably too much, but Mickey makes no such attempt at all.

For me, it's about this: you either get to be exactly the way you want to be all the time, or you get to have friends and relationships. You can be "authentic" or you can have love. You can't have both.

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

Yeah, I just don't get why she gets a pass for being bitchy because she's up-front about it.

I think it has more to do with her being pretty. But for the sake of argument, I'll go with it being b/c she's upfront about it. But guess what? That's worse! She KNOWS she's doing it and still does it. That's not a respectable trait.

Just think if we applied that incredibly stupid logic to other things?

He's a rapist, but it's okay b/c he's upfront about it. (I know someone will completely miss the point of this and say "But rape is illegal, being rude isn't. So your analogy is flawed." But my point wasn't about legality, it was about tolerating awful behavior b/c "they were just being true to themselves")

But yeah, if Mickey were ugly and acting the same way she'd have far less supporters in here. I was trying to stay away from making it about looks again, but I can't. She's too pretty. It absolutely plays a large role as to why so many people think Gus is worse and she's "misunderstood".

For me, it's about this: you either get to be exactly the way you want to be all the time, or you get to have friends and relationships. You can be "authentic" or you can have love. You can't have both.

I don't know if I fully agree, but I can't argue with that logic at all b/c it does make sense. I would say that your best bet is to find the people you can mostly be yourself around and be friends (or date) them. It's probably the only way you can still keep a large amount of yourself without being a pr*ck (or being lonely). I have a wonderful girlfriend. Been together nearly 4 years. It's not a perfect relationship. Could use a little more passion. But we really have become best friends and I don't think I could be "this real" with any other girl on the planet. Well, I could, but my relationships would be very short.

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[–] MoshiMoshiYoshi 8 years ago

You obviously don't see it the way others do. Seems as though you made this topic just for the sake of arguing. It's like you want to force your opinion of him onto everyone.

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

I disagree with you. Get over it. Are you an only child? Why is this so difficult for you to handle?

You obviously don't see it the way others do.

That's a terrible argument. A lot of people used to think the world is flat. Please use that as undeniable proof that just b/c a lot of people think something doesn't make the other person wrong.

Seems as though you made this topic just for the sake of arguing.

Well, to be fair I didn't start this topic, however I did "disagree" with some of the posters. This is a discussion forum not a "let's all agree" forum.

It's like you want to force your opinion of him onto everyone.

No, it's like I disagree with some people and that's it. You take this too seriously. I predict you are single.

Anyway, I've grown bored of you.

BYE BYE 

(you can have the last word if you really need it).

*EDIT: Wow, you really did need the last word. Good for you. 

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[–] MoshiMoshiYoshi 8 years ago

The irony in your claims and insults is hilarious. Assuming people are single, or a child, based on random posts on a random forum, comparing yourself and this discussion to that of world-famous philosophers and the revolution of humanity's understanding... You seem to take it more seriously than literally everyone on this board.

There's having discussions, and then there's you... flooding threads and, again, trying to force your opinions onto everyone. And if someone tells you to stop, you try to turn it around on them.

I'm now wondering just how many people have grown bored of you, since you seem quite repetitive and pathetic.

Good riddance jackass. 

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[–] streetmeet 8 years ago

He is defenitely condesending. He definately talks down to mickey and probably his other exes too. I can see how his lovers would descride him as fake nuce since thats probably how it feels when he talks down to them

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[–] doggie_rodriguez 8 years ago

No offense, but Mickey needs to be talked down to. She's completely oblivious to how her actions negatively affect others.

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[–] fede_4488 8 years ago

He's the typical entitled guy who thinks of himself as "nice guy" but is really not. You know, the one who asks why nice guys like him are single but douchebags and jocks are loved by the hot, popular girls.
The fight outside the set gave that away.

If I don't reply, you're probably on my ignore list for something I forgot already

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[–] Shiny-NZ 7 years ago

^ I think there really is some truth to this. Real people aren't usually 'nice' all the time - I think it's impossible, we all have off days, and we all do things we regret and carry around pieces of shame with us. We make mistakes, and sometimes we say stupid s*** or whatever - but I think Gus's identity is quite heavily tied up with his idea of himself as being 'always nice' and that equaling 'always good'. It's unrealistic. Even when he's on the really bad date with Mickey's roommate he's most cringey when he's trying his hardest to be 'nice'. Like when he shifts tables (but tells the waiter it's because she's cold), or he describes how if a waiter is rude to him he'll supposedly over-tip to make them feel guilty. It's kind of nice, I guess, but it's also this weird passive aggressive game, it's too much, it's unrealistic. He likes to see himself as "the nice guy who finishes last" and also "the victim". I think Gus still plays games. But he doesn't have the self-awareness about himself to see it, and accept that it's a flaw of his and maybe try and improve it.
I think this is why he spirals so dramatically at the end of the season - physically fighting a girl for her own laptop, screwing the actress a day after screwing Mickey etc. His behavior isn't the worst behavior in the world - but he's so dedicated to the image he has of himself that he simply can't handle it.

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[–] pdlussier1 7 years ago

Agree totally. The whole "fake nice" thing annoys me, and it seems like people are just parroting his ex from episode 1. Even when Mickey accuses him of being "pretend nice" when she flips out at his work, it makes no sense coming from her. Heidi is my definition of "fake nice".

I see Gus as genuinely nice but with (potentially serious) social & behavioral issues; these are at odds with, and are amplified at times given, the milieu in which he works and its related personalities.
On top of the issues you mention, I think the "fake" misconception comes from the fact that Gus has problems establishing boundaries (and earning respect) and also can't deal adequately with confrontation, which means that he may occasionally do things he may not feel like doing just because doing the seemingly nice and/or polite thing is easier. Also, he appears to have destructive expectations related to his niceness, expecting that he's owed equal amounts of nice, from the universe if not an individual, and gets ruffled and grouses when people don't automatically reciprocate to his satisfaction. This aspect doesn't contradict his or a "nice guy" nature, though, but explains why he comes across as mean sometimes and in reaction to a variable tipping point, albeit if you actually listen to what he's saying then it's virtually all tone not meaning; other than reflexive venting, not once does he cruelly attack anyone.

Ignorance is bliss... 'til it posts on the Internet, then, it's annoying.

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