This is cult level bad

Yeah, it's a mess. I anticipated that as soon as I saw the Asylum logo, but I figured I'd give it a chance, since (a) I've legitimately liked a handful of Asylum films, and enough others I've found to be entertaining as trainwrecks, (b) I know someone who is a hardcore "cat person" who'd watch anything even "one tenth decent" if it has good cat content (And I'm on the fence whether I should bother mentioning this to them, because it's a lot to sit through for relatively poorly done and decreasingly-rewarding-as-it-goes-on cat content, even though I know that they would enjoy some of the cat stuff here), and (c) even though I'm a very lenient film viewer in general--at least with films in my preferred genres, I tend to be extra lenient when it comes to Christmas films for a few different reasons.

Also, it can be much easier for me to sit through a film if there are women I'm attracted to in it (an easy feat, since I'm attracted to the vast majority of women), and I really dug the mom (Nicola Lambo), despite the character's awful personality.


But even with all of that, I thought Santa Claws was a mess. They just didn't seem to care if the plot made any sense, both on a broad and a fine-grained level, it has horrible pacing, the direction and performances are pretty bad, the special effects worse, and they made very little effort with the "kitties playing Santa/delivering presents" idea--in fact, they eventually seem to just completely give up on that about 2/3 of the way through.

I like cats, but this movie doesn't do it for me.