SPOT THE STUPID - A Warden's Ransom drinking game

I just caught this on Lifetime again last night and it once again solidifies my contention that this was one of the laziest films ever made. It was obvious that the filmmakers couldn't care less about their viewers and didn't bother getting even a single detail right. If you are or were a police officer, military, corrections or law enforcement, you are going to HATE this film. (In fact, if you have more than a few functioning brain cells, you are going to HATE this movie.)

So I decided to turn it into a drinking game.

For every STUPID thing you spot in this show, you get to take one drink. If it is INCREDIBLY STUPID, it is worth double points. (And, yes, this whole thread is full of spoilers; that's kinda the point.)

Just a word of warning. This is designed as a party game to laugh at how badly one can actually make a show and still have it shown on TV. If you try to do this solo, you will not last 30 minutes. My wife and I don't drink but our son is a corrections officer and him and his buddies lasted about 45 minutes before it just became too stupid to watch. (And consider that they were hoping for stupid so they could win the contest.

So ... how many can you spot?

- First of all, in spite of the title ... where's the ransom? There was no ransom ever mentioned or used in the story line.

- It was so obvious this was filmed in some high school up in Canada. One of the most dangerous serial killers in the country is housed in a prison where there is only ONE thin chain link fence preventing escape. The entire production design of this low-rent piece of crap movie was pathetic. Every time someone spots the one thin chain link fence protecting the prisoners from escaping, it is worth one drink.

- Inmates walk freely down the same hallway as staff. When the staff open doors, there is always some kind of "bzzzt" sound, but no indication of who opens the doors and how; the doors just "bzzzt." All the doors are regular high school classroom doors and they didn't even try to cover up the glass in the doors. Every time a door goes "bzzzt", take a drink.

- Reporters can come and go as they please, and they don't even segregate the prisoners from the reporters. During a press conference, the warden tells them she is going to have to deal with a prisoner first before she can address them. He gets up from the chair where he was sitting behind them in the same room. (Uncuffed of course.) The first person to spot this complete lack of security gets to take TWO drinks.

- The prisoners in the intake yard are all cuffed in front. They have no other restraints on, which means they could attack the warden or the guards at any time. Obviously, the filmmakers have never seen or contemplated how cuffs can be used as deadly weapons. (Do they not know that prisoners actually practice techniques in the yard on how to escape cuffs and how to attack police officers and take their weapons away from them?) The first person to spot any prisoner in the yard cuffed in front with no other restraints, take a drink.

(Or maybe the filmmakers are thinking viewers are so stupid that they will believe the one layer of chain link will stop one from simply running away into the parking lot and hijacking a vehicle just the other side of that gate?)

- The most dangerous serial killer in the country is transported to the prison in a "highly secure" - wait for it - Budget rent a car van. It is not armored or protected in any way and they never even tried faking an interior in the van. In fact, all they added was a couple of visible LED panels, suction cupped to the inside to light the interior for camera. When you see this low rent van they are using as their "highly secure" prisoner transfer, take a drink. An extra bonus drink is awarded when you see the lighting panels on the inside of the van IN THE SHOT the whole time.

- When the warden's assistant says the word "STAT!" everyone gets to take two drinks. This is not just STUPID FILMMAKING, this is STUPID WRITING. Neither the writer nor the director should ever come down here to California; they would both get laughed out of town in a heartbeat. (Or maybe in a Budget rent-a-van.)

- One drink for every time you see an armed guard INSIDE the prison walls, where prisoners can use them to escape or take hostages any time they want.

- The first person who spots the red neck in the pickup truck who pulls out a PELLET GUN, gets to take a drink. No one gets to take a drink if someone points out, why can someone drive right up to the front gate with a truck and a pellet rifle, with a cocking barrel. If this is their level of security, imagine what would happen is one day someone drives up to the front gate with a REAL rifle!

- When the three bad guys break into the prison with the guns, everyone takes a drink when they casually stroll in to the prison through the OPEN GATE, and then just open the UNSECURED back door. Bonus drinks are awarded every time you see they are carrying plastic toy guns.

- No one gets a drink when they go into the armory with all the toy guns hanging from the wall, through one thin door that actually has a WINDOW in it. This is just TOO stupid for words, let alone drinks.

- Every time the warden loads her plastic gun by inserting the magazine and fake chambering a round, it is worth one drink. Just to help judge, she loads it in the armoury, loads it AGAIN outside the armoury and then loads in AGAIN after she fires one shot. I guess all the police guns in Canada can only fire one shot.

- One drink is taken by each person who first spots the warden with her finger inside the trigger guard. (Better stock up the bar beforehand; you will need a LOT of drinks.

Honestly, if no one up there knows the slightest thing about guns, could they have not done a FIVE SECOND GOOGLE SEARCH to see how real law enforcement officers carry they guns. FIVE SECONDS. Lazy. Lazy. Lazy.

And, by the way, thats just the first 40 MINUTES.

I didn't bother tracking any more because, frankly my son's friends were all drunk and we just couldn't watch this stupid show one more second.

I would hope these people would have enough ethics and professional pride to be absolutely ashamed of their involvement with this show.