MovieChat Forums > Jane Wants a Boyfriend (2016) Discussion > Of course a cute girl with Aspergers wou...

Of course a cute girl with Aspergers would find a boyfriend...


It doesn't matter if a woman is deaf, dumb or blind, as long as she's got an attractive face, there will always be some guy who is interested in her.

What if the roles were reversed? If it were a guy suffering with AS, would a "normal" girl be into him? Probably not (and yes, I've seen Adam). The most painful example of this is during the blind date scene where it's clear Jane isn't into the dude (who others consider her "equal"). I can't see that guy ever getting his happy ending. I'd like to see the sequel: Steven Wants a Girlfriend (& Kills Himself).

Also, if Jane were ugly and fat, I guarantee the ending wouldn't be as inspirational.

I liked it, though. I thought it was very well-acted, with honorable intentions.

reply

Your first sentence is spot-on. Guys don't care if a girl is socially awkward if she's cute. Girls though won't give a guy with AS the time of day and yeah, he probably would end up putting a gun in his mouth and pulling the trigger to end it all.

reply

I totally agree with you both. I felt sorry for Steven, but to me it seemed Jack only liked Jane as a novelty. To him, Jane is unique, quirky, different but I do believe he would not want to get serious about her. He would have gotten bored and frustrated with her outbursts and other things about her.

Nice seeing Polly Draper in the film; I loved her in the old TV series 30-Something.

reply

She didn't appear cute to me. Quite plain indeed

reply

I agree, I thought Jane was a plain jane at best.

reply

I liked her look.

reply

Physical attraction is a big part of most relationships. Without it all you have is a friendship.

So I don't really get the point you are trying to make. Guys like pretty girls.

Yep. This is nothing new.

Next?

reply

Yes, guys like pretty girls. Speaking as a guy I can confirm that's nothing new.

The point that the OP seems to be trying to make is that the fact that she has Asperger's Syndrome wouldn't be enough to dissuade a lot of us from going out with a girl like her.

Of course guys have their limitations too. I think Squeaky Fromme was pretty, but she's such a whacked-out deluded follower of Charlie Manson, that I wouldn't even touch her if I thought I had the slightest chance with her.

reply

The most painful example of this is during the blind date scene where it's clear Jane isn't into the dude (who others consider her "equal").


I think that's not entirely fair. Jane criticized him for what he did - he didn't listen at all to what she said or ask one thing about her, ordered for her etc.

Of course you could attribute that behaviour to aspergers and him being nervous. But still he probably could behaved nicer.

Generally I do agree with the notion though, gender dynamics aren't equal. We are genetically predisposed to different roles, and a women with asperger can probably bear and raise perfectly healthy children, while a man would be expected to provide.

reply

The most painful example of this is during the blind date scene where it's clear Jane isn't into the dude (who others consider her "equal").

Let's be honest, he wasn't her "equal". As you said, Jane was quite good-looking, while this aforementioned guy was ugly af.

reply

I'm not naive enough to say you are completely wrong but I personally married a quirky, later diagnosed aspy, guy. I'm a good looking woman I think and my husband is attractive to me, maybe not your standard what the world perceives to be tho. I was very attracted to his personality and all his quirks. So yes, in my case a neurotypical girl fell for a guy on the spectrum! While maybe rare it can happen. Since I also have a aspy kid, I hope he finds another who loves him for his weirdness, no matter what she looks like.

reply

The thing is guys don't care about a girl's social skills AT ALL. Girls care about a guy's social skills quite a bit.

Formerly RIP_Matthew_Abaddon.

reply

The thing is guys don't care about a girl's social skills AT ALL. Girls care about a guy's social skills quite a bit.

That pretty much sums it all up in a nutshell.

All of the replies I've received have an element of truth in them which is proof positive why I am alone.

I just finished watching an Israeli movie called Wedding Doll/Hatuna MeNiyar (2015) which deals with the same subject matter -- a developmentally challenged (but extremely beautiful) girl who's obsessed with getting married -- but the film is much more realistic and with a completely sobering outcome. As such, I liked it a lot more than this movie.

reply

Why do girls care a lot more about social skills in a man though? Why do they find it to be a much bigger deal?

reply

Why do girls care a lot more about social skills in a man though? Why do they find it to be a much bigger deal?


It's a good question, and I'm not sure either. It's not just social awkwardness per se that turns off women, but also an Aspy man probably doesn't have much of a social life, which is how men and women usually meet their significant other i.e. networking, friends of friends, etc.

Think about it: without a large social circle, an Aspy male would have no choice but to just cold approach women and most women probably find that creepy.

Formerly RIP_Matthew_Abaddon.

reply

I am autistic and that is actually what I do is cold approach women. I would say about a quarter to a third, find it maybe a bit creepy, where as the other two thirds, respond positively. I read books on how to pick up women and get dates, such as Double Your Dating, and The Mystery Method, and those books really helped.

Even if I am socially awkward I have developed sort of a social rebel attitude about it, and a lot of women like that it seems. However, so far I have been only good at getting sex and physical relationships, but have not been so great at at long term ones yet.

One friend told me that the women I get only seem to want one thing (sex). So I have been doing really well at seduction after reading the books, but not maintaining a relationship into something more.

One girl told a friend of mine that she could not date me, cause of my autism, but that I am hot and would like to get me into bed.

So I guess that is the downside of being autistic for me, is that I can only attract women on that level so far, by being socially awkward, and acting like a rebel about it, which I guess comes off as alpha-male-ish.

However, perhaps the movie might have been a stronger story, if they made the main character a male instead of a female. What do you think?

reply

One girl told a friend of mine that she could not date me, cause of my autism, but that I am hot and would like to get me into bed.

I guess you just proved the other point I made, which is all that really matters is looks.

Also, *beep* you.

reply

Above poster seems trollish. PUA isn't really practical for Aspies...believe me, I've read a lot of it.

As for looks, I think they only matter in the extremes...good social skills won't save a really ugly guy, bad social skills won't hinder a really good-looking one, but for the other 80% of guys, social skills matter. I'm tall, fairly thin, and have a full head of hair...didn't get my first real girlfriend until well into my thirties.

Formerly RIP_Matthew_Abaddon.

reply

Am I the one who seems trollish you mean?

reply

Not sure, but I think potatoW/ was refering to the OP.

That "-beep- you" seemed to come out of left field.

I found your long post interesting.



I'm sorry baby, I had to crash that Honda.

reply

[deleted]