What we learned from Survivor to prepare you for the coming Apocalypse

- If you ever go in a space ship looking for other planets, ignore information about the thousands of planets we already found (including some of around Earth-size and in habitable zones).
- Captain of a star ship is the easiest job in the world.
- After searching for a planet for 31 years, the news that a planet was discovered will make everyone smile slightly.
- A planet can be within a wormhole.
- If you ever find yourself in the wreck of a space ship, hope that someone switched the standard-issue space suit with a parachute.
- If a space ship breaks up, its wreckage will turns into a hail of meteors, while the crew will land softly nearby within a few metres from each other (except for one).
- On an open beach, nobody can detect approaching attackers.
- A leg wound will make you faster.
- When meeting human-sized, human-formed beings, don't bother to check whether they are humans.
- Virtual reality is a better preparation for the life of desert barbarian than the life of a desert barbarian.
- If you want to remain unseen in hilly terrain, always rest on the peaks and ridges.
- A 100 g arrow will stop a 400 kg wild beast in mid-air.
- To tame a wild horse, follow these steps: 1. Kick some dirt.

[Sorry, at this point I gave up. This is Battlefield-Earth-level bad.]