MovieChat Forums > Survivor (2015) Discussion > Quite possibly the stupidest movie I eve...

Quite possibly the stupidest movie I ever saw!

posted 9 years ago by nickb-13
14 replies | jump to latest

I don't remember the last time I saw a movie this idiotic, stupid, and downright retarded. The acting was OK and my issue is with the script.

Script made little to no sense. I'm actually amazed how idiotic the script is. It was clearly written by someone who has NO CLUE about how things work in the real world. Script was also disconnected, full of plot holes, and laughable. Starting with that Taliban guy looking up info on someone's whole family through some "hacked" US mil connection, then to think that after embassy sends for some kind of a super-woman visa inspector that gets overruled all the time, then to think that whole of UK gov, down to Home Secretary, is pissed off because someone asked about someone's security credentials, then to think that a security card can transmit signals so powerful that you can detect it inside buildings and under the subway, then they even had a british woman working the US security systems...

AHHAHAHAHAH

Laughable. The whole thing is BEYOND IDIOTIC!

I've taken a note of Philip Shelby, the author of this script, and will make sure to skip any of his future movies (if he ever writes another one)... the guy has an IQ lower than his shoe size.

[–] rabbitmoon 9 years ago

You left out so much!

Brosnan plays one of the most skilled, wanted assassins EVER - except he can't kill a girl, no matter how hard he tries.
Bomb in restaurant - nope, doesn't keep an eye on her beforehand
Shoot her after restaurant - nope, knocked over by a gas canister
Shoot her in the alleyway - nope, misses
At Bill's apartment - nope, doesn't block the entrance and lets her sneak out
In the underground - nope, uses a useless stun grenade, lets her hit him
On the rooftop - nope, lets her push him off the edge

Seriously - that is one terrible assassin.

If the original goal was to stop her for just one day so that they could get their visas - surely some poison in the food to make her sick would have sufficed? Or a temporary kidnapping?

Bearing in mind that doctor guys visa wasn't approved, how did he get to NYC? And if it was approved, why did they try to kill the girl?

What happened to the retina scans that the US uses on entry?

How were all three of them able to fly out so easily when there had been two huge bombs in London, airports would be on lockdown and loads of people would be wanting to evacuate?

Why did they leave it so late until testing the smaller gas bomb (literally the day he was flying out?)

Also - the Taxi Driver was the true hero of the film. If it wasn't for his TV, and putting it on at the exact right time, a "million" people would have been blown to bits.

[–] nickb-13 9 years ago

Hhahaha... you know, THE WHOLE MOVIE is so damn stupid, it's not even funny! EVERYTHING is stupid and makes ZERO sense. You have to be drunk or high to watch this crap and think it makes sense.

One of the unintentionally laughable moments is when he kills that guy that was working on that ID. He kills him because he "knew about Dubai"... hahahaha... he should be worried about who told him about Dubai not about the damn guy. Probably everyone in their line of business knows his track record. It's beyond retarded. And he works on Bill's ID card yet he somehow gets to track the woman (Milla). Hahahahah... wtf man?!? It's like picking up some random SIM card and being able to track whoever you want.

And remember that scene when they try to figure out where Milla went and they see Paris on screen and then it morphs into NYC... as if anyone can morph database records like that. Holy crap man... it's so damn idiotic.

The screenwriter is one the dumbest people in business for writing this garbage and I'm shocked this crap got funded and that people reading the script didn't question the amount of nonsense in it.

[–] idoubt_zr4_ithink 8 years ago

I agree. Movie is so retarded I don't even want my money back. I just want to reformat that part of my memory where this idiotic movie is stored.

My main complain is: do you really need the most skilled assassin in the world to shoot a 12 feet diameter ball with a Steyr HS .50, even if it is from almost a mile away (effective range is 1500 m, little less than a mile). C'mon! Probably not even Pierce Brosnan could keep a straight face when he was aiming for such a "difficult" target as a TWELVE FEET DIAMETER BALL! How do you miss that?!

[–] bearuk 9 years ago

If this is the stupidest movie you ever saw you haven't seen many movies!

[–] willydoe71 9 years ago

That's what I was thinking too!

[–] seans_life 9 years ago

I agree with bearuk. Clearly the people calling this movie stupid and more haven't seen a movie like Freddy Got Fingered or something as bad as that. Seriously check out my list of other movies I have seen and look at the movies I have a 1 or 2 rating for and then come back and tell me this movie was stupid compared to those and well I know you won't come back and do that because you would be wrong and be too embarrassed to admit this movie was far from stupid as compared to those.

[–] 9 years ago

[deleted]

[–] OtisLovesUs 9 years ago

Practically every scene relied on contrivances and coincidences, unbelievable motivations and mind boggling decisions. I mean, I was rolling my eyes in the opening freaking scene!

And the ending, oh my god. She's basically the most wanted person in the world by the time she reaches NY. She's considered by the U.S. government to be an international terrorist. It's New Years Eve in Times Square--which is perennially considered a prime terrorist target. She pulls a gun on a security guard, asks where two guys went. He tells her and she simply lets him go and heads on up. As if she wouldn't have been swarmed by a hundred cops within 15 seconds of that! Nope, no biggie.

But it gets better. Because after she stops a terror plot to kill more than a million people, motivated by--get this--a scientist being pissed off at the citizens of the United States because some bureaucratic red tape prevented his wife from getting through customs for an operation years ago… after all that, the whole mixup is apparently all cleared up in very short order, before she's even been taken into custody. But we have to assume that she's a very persuasive lass, since it's never shown how she pulled that feat off. Remember though, this is the same woman who couldn't convince countless people she knew and worked for that a single visa application might be a little hinky.

Absurd top to bottom.

[–] buddha9 9 years ago

Don't forget that she was able to evade the entire security apparatus with a pair of glasses! It may seem minor, but as a so-called security expert she seemed clueless that London is one of the most camera covered city in the world, but she couldn't be bothered to put on a hat or something else to somewhat disguise her face. This isn't the stupidest movie I've ever seen; it was just one of the most annoying.

[–] michinine 8 years ago

after all that, the whole mixup is apparently all cleared up in very short order, before she's even been taken into custody. But we have to assume that she's a very persuasive lass, since it's never shown how she pulled that feat off.

You mean a dead scientist, a dead assassin, a bunch of weapons on the ground, including a large tactical sniper weapon? And she dressed like a tourist from London, not like "special ops" you would expect?

The cops would have put her on the ground and she only needed THEM to make one phone call. Just one.

And it didn't solve within minutes. There were like 20 people on the roof, the last scene would have at least taken 1-2 hours after the fight.

The movie has lots of contrivances but this wasn't the one that strike me the most. London hat two attacks in one day, one major. No flight, no train would have gone out for days.

[–] nickerboy 9 years ago

I have a queston. The whole terrorist plot revolves around putting their gas in place of nitrogen being used to cool LED bulbs. Since when do LED bulbs need cooling? Isn't the fact they don't produce heat one of the reasons they are becoming more widely used?

[–] kanyon18080 8 years ago

This entire thread is just gold.

[–] FridayOnElmStreet 8 years ago

Watch Saving Christmas or Audacity.

[–] FilmBoy (1079) 10 months ago

Yep - I turned it off after the underground subway chase.
Went on for 5 mins of running around and she loses the English Cops and goes a few levels deeper and there's Pierce waiting in the dark, rolling a stun grenade at her. An idiot would easily realize that a bullet to the head would be easier, but noooooo.
WHERE THE FUCK DID HE COME FROM?!
Even if he had a GPS tracking her position
Even if the GPS worked underground
Even if the GPS could tell you which subterranean level she was on
THE GPS CANNOT TELL YOU WHERE SHE IS GOING TO BE IN 10 MINUTES, AND THEN YOU WAIT FOR HER THERE!!!
There were way too many other insults to the audience. I had to leave the movie at that point and retain some dignity.