MovieChat Forums > Welcome to Me (2015) Discussion > This IS borderline personality disorder!...

This IS borderline personality disorder! Here's why:


I have another thread on here that I started before the release of this movie. You can find that here: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2788716/board/thread/242231752?p=1

I have seen a lot of people who either have the disorder or just an opinion, don't think this is an accurate portrayal of the disorder.

I found this film to be comical, depressing and very accurate. If you read the criteria for BPD you may think that this person will act out in all sorts of ways; self injure, attempt suicide regularly, have many sexual encounters, have substance abuse or eating disorder problems, and much more. BP's who exhibit these are known as "Classic Borderlines" and are the most commonly portrayed in media.

However there is another type of BP called the "Quiet Borderline" and I believe this movie to be a representation of that form of Borderline Personality Disorder. You can read more about that here http://borderlinepersonality.typepad.com/my_weblog/2008/07/the-quiet-borde.html

This is a story about a young woman who doesn't quite live in reality. She is narcissistic and focused on getting other people to understand her, and to get a better understanding of herself. Kristen Wigg did an amazing job.

As a borderline who is in decent recovery, I related to this film in many ways. I have trouble w/ relationships of all sorts. Friends, romantic, family. I am very self centered and have a hard time relating to people, especially empathetically. I have never had a long term friendship, and only romantic relationships which were very abusive on both ends. Both of these can be seen with her friend, who she has a hard time empathizing w/ (ex: offering her money as an apology, totally missing the point), and the two sexual/romantic encounters she had in the film. This sexual impulsivity is also a known trait of some BPs

BPs often don't remember situations accurately. We have extreme sensitivity to emotions which alter our memories of situations. This can be seen in her reenactments of her life during the film. Extreme anger can also be shown in the reenactments.

During times of extreme distress, we may experience what is called dissociation which means we don't feel real or we may see ourself in an out of body type way, and experience memory loss... often during these times we can be described as being "checked out" or "not all there" and do bizarre things such as streaking!

Fear of abandonment is evident when she realizes that her therapist is firing her... and even goes back after the very clear boundary has been set that she needs to find a new therapist.

Alice's obsession w/ TV obviously stems from her lack of sense of self (a trademark criteriea in all cluster B disorder), where she doesn't quite know what she wants to do with herself and her life. She feels lost and disconnected from society. She has no idea what her own personality is, so she obsessively watches talk shows and learns them line for line because she can't find a way to find a personality of her own. We do see her as her own person at least once in the show, when she is neutering the dogs/taking care of the dogs. This is obviously something that she knows she has a passion for (despite the recklessness of the procedure).

Is this textbook BPD? No. But BPD can manifest in so many different ways that saying this is an inaccurate portrayal is incorrect... it is just a different portrayal than expected or that we are used to.

I hope some of you may change your opinion after reading this. :)

reply

Love your posts! So informative, and as a newly graduating clinical social worker, everything you're saying matches my experiences with friends, family and clients with BPD. Thank you for your kindness and the generosity of your insights!

reply

Love your posts! So informative, and as a newly graduating clinical social worker, everything you're saying matches my experiences with friends, family and clients with BPD. Thank you for your kindness and the generosity of your insights! I enjoyed the film as well.

reply

Thank you for articulating this. I myself am a Quiet/Internalizing Borderline. I approached the film with trepidation (Are they going to completely mock us? Are they going to show a completely narcissistic out of control stereotype encouraging the continuation of stigmatizing?) The reviews panned it so heavily, but mostly for what critics felt like was a cop-out/PC ending. I enjoyed the film, but am very much still digesting it. I left feeling confused, shameful, drove around crying for a while "Is this how I'm seen? - all that back & forth BPD usual though process." I'm still very much digesting & processing. I came home & cried for at least an hour. I know now I should not have seen it alone, but I couldn't figure out a person to go with not fully understanding how we'd be portrayed. I look forward to having the chance to discuss it both with those with BPD or other mood regulation issues as well as those around me without these issues. I think I need to see it again with a trusted non-MI loved one.

And thank you also for the Betty Blue recommendation - I hadn't heard of it & look forward to watching it.

reply

Personally, I don't identify with her, nor recognise any others I know with bpd in her. They've ticked certain boxes to clarify it it as bpd but if what marks her apart is having NPD in conjunction with BPD they should make mention of it. My friends are the most loving, caring and thoughtful people I've met - they put others first to the point they sacrifice their own happiness without a moments thought. They don't have the narcissistic traits that Kristen Wiggs character has in this film.

reply

I understand where you are coming from. I definitely dont want to invalidate your experiences at all so please don't think that I am doing that. But there are so many ways BPD can present itself... so much criteria and only some need to be met. So the combinations of symptoms or behaviors can vary so widely that it is impossible to showcase a "realistic" borderline. Narcissism is very real in bpd and some people may have both of the personality disorders.

reply

So for me this is how the film worked for you is fantastic, for you to be introspective from the film is a healthy thing...

I thoughts the film's detractors are pathetic... How is kristin supposed to play it, go really dark. No way, that's not her schtik.

I thought it was an honest film and I applaud it for your reactions, and to you for your bravery.

Hope everything works out for you.

reply

Thank you for your post and explanations. Very interesting. Also I wish you the best of luck! I know Alice would say luck has nothing to do with it ;)

reply

I did social work many years ago and also know people with BPD. I found the film great in that it dramatises the issues in an engaging way.
The problem is that people will go and watch the film with wrong expectations if the marketing is not upfront. Most marketing material tries to avoid the word mental illness, then people watch the movie and expect another version of Bridesmaids. It just attracts the wrong audience.
I hope that if this film gets a release in Europe (and I really hope it does) that it is properly advertised and not trying to hide that it's about mental illness. I think this film is phantastic to raise an understanding of mental illness, to help to understand why narcistic elements emerge and that it's not the intention to hurt other people or friends with it.

reply

thank you for taking the time to explain this to us. I'm suffering from PTSD and don't know much about BPD and couldn't really grasp some of the signs that you pointed out.
The neutering scene for example, made me feel very uncomfortable, because since she kept using the wrong words to explain things, i wasn't convinced she actually knew what she was doing.

some reviewers said that they could find themselves in some of the characters having a person BPD in their life but it wasn't clear to me what exactly it was apart from her obvious self obsession and lack of empathy.

reply