Things I have learned from Last Ounce of Courage
1. Cities all across the country are passing laws to ban Christmas.
2. Churches can be forced to remove religious symbols from their property if someone else is offended.
3. All high school theater directors are gay.
4. The U.S. was involved in a war in the Middle East in 1998.
5. A pharmacist will treat gunshot wounds and not report it to the police if you're a member of a biker gang.
6. Rather than being traumatized by a video of his father getting killed, a teenager will share the video with the audience of a school play.
7. You can be arrested for putting a cross on a church.
8. It's OK for someone to die for their country as long as they're fighting for the freedom of conservative Christians.
9. When hoisting a heavy cross up the side of a building with a rope, it will magically attach itself to its mounts on the side of the building.
10. People will actually protest Christmas if you put up a Christmas tree in public.
11. Liberal lawyers are black.
12. It's illegal to put a nativity scene on your own property.
13. People will stop celebrating Christmas if the government passes laws banning public Christmas displays.
14. Teenagers will sabotage a school play because they admire what adults are doing.
15. High school students are routinely suspended for taking bibles to school.
16. You're not a true, patriotic American until you ride a Harley with a huge American flag mounted on the back of it.
17. When Christians aren't allowed to force religion into government, they think they're losing their freedom.
18. Ronald Reagan is the patron saint of conservative Christians.
19. Bill O'Rielly's "War on Christmas" was finally made into a movie.
20. Kirk Cameron is probably kicking himself for not getting in on this movie.
21. Biker gangs usually have a midget as their leader.
22. Despite making up about 80% of the population, Christians in the United States are the most persecuted group ever.
23. Pharmacists have the surgical skill and equipment to treat a gunshot wound to the abdomen.
24. When someone dies in a sudden, traumatic manner, they always close their eyes when they die.