1. Do not taunt a sharpshooter on the other side of a narrow river.
Where would rock 'n' roll be without feedback?
If you're a starving Yankee and get caught pilfering corn, don't believe for a second that a Hatfield will really let you go.
Om Mani Padme Hum
We learn just how destructive hate can be, and how violence is handed down from father to son. We also learn how injustice can escalate. There are lessons to be learned from this violent history, and they're good lessons to learn from.
shareWhat goes around comes around with bad Karma.
shareIf you have a patch of white on top of your otherwise dark hair, you should either avoid family feuds or dye to it to avoid being the guy who gets scalped.
shareIf you ever get poked in the eye with splinters from a falling tree, and people call you "fog eye" just keep going around with your "fog eye" showing it off to everybody. Don't bother to wear an eye patch and be cool like Rooster Cogburn.
shareIf your name is Johnse Hatfield, you always say that you really aimed way over the victim's head. It was everyone else that "dunnit" every single time.
share8. If someone insults your book, do not draw your guns
9. Do not throw dynamite at trees
10. Throwing rocks is a good defense against a man with a gun
11. Do not walk out of your house with guns in each hand pointed at the sky
12. Do not fight your own battles, send family, friends and bounty hunters to die for you
If your son knocks-up the daughter of your rival it's best to let him marry her and make peace before things get out of hand.
My name's Pitt. And your ass ain't talkin' your way out of this *beep*
Don't bother saving that fox and letting him loose across the river - your brother will only kill it as soon as you leave.
share- If a bunch of your family is sentenced to life in prison, and your dim bulb cousin is hanged, do NOT return from Oregon.
- You can live a life of murder and intimidation so long as you get baptized in your old age.
- You can attend any massacre perpetrated by your family and be completely excused by saying "I wuddent part o' that" or "I shot above their heads."
- You can be a major bad a$$, survive the best the Hatfields can throw at you, help end the feud, become a celebrity, and get shot in a bar by your own deputy.
- A pig ain't worth it.
- No matter how many times he tries, Kevin Costner cannot pull off a Southern accent.
- No matter how many times he tries, Bill Paxton flying into a rage always evokes memories of "Game over, man! Game over!!"
That going across a river during the night on horseback with torches is ALWAYS a good idea because no-one will be expecting that.
Too much sugar in your coffee this morning?-Kari to Grant on Mythbusters.