AVOID THIS PIECE OF CRAP AT ALL COSTS!

So I saw a trailer for this movie on THE BABYSITTER MASSACRE DVD and even from that, it looked absolutely horrible. But I thought it might be fun in a good bad way. It is not. AT ALL. It is pure, unrefined crap.

This movie is pure torture.

Mongoloids who had maybe seen a movie once in their lives made this movie. They said to themselves, "Hey remember that one movie we watched once? WE should make a movie now."

The photography is just utter crap. Think THINGS and CURSE OF THE WOLF crappy. Distracting shadows on the walls everywhere. Everything is bathed in a yucky orange light for no reason. Contrast? WHAT'S THAT?

Everyone involved in the making of this movie needs to be sent to a Siberian gulag.

And the sound. Jesus, the sound. Most of this crap was shot indoors and it's STILL DUBBED OVER. People outside talking are clearly speaking in a closed broom closet.

"Oh! Look at how offensive and tasteless we're being! We're just like a Troma movie!" No, you're not. You are ten times worse. Also, aspiring to be a Troma movie is generally not a good thing anyway.

Know what the sad thing is? There are quite good horror movies out there that are being made with even less of a budget than this stercolith. A couple of weeks back, I bought one of those 4-pack horror deals that you find in the 5-buck DVD bin. The movie I watched was called THE VAMPIRE CONSPIRACY. I was expecting NOTHING and it ended up blowing me away. This just goes to show that decent movies CAN be made for 8 cents if you have decent writing and acting, and that one sure as hell did.

In conclusion, if the director of this "movie" were to suddenly die, I would make a sojourn to his grave only to urinate on it. Have mentioned that this film is a giant piece of crap?