MovieChat Forums > Good Deeds (2012) Discussion > Captain-Save-A...

Captain-Save-A...

posted 12 years ago by shawnjames_2000
22 replies | jump to latest

Reading the plot of this movie and it's...
Look Up in the sky! It's a bird!
It's a Plane!
It's Captain Save-A-Hoe!

Rich guy choosing a single mom over a woman without kids and drama? Man please. The woman without kids wins ALL THE TIME. No drama, no baggage, no Baby Daddy starting beef.

Sorry, but this fantasy Tylyer Perry has of rich guys coming to save busted down chicks is just UNREALISTIC and DELUSIONAL. it's meant to pander to Black women who think that some rich dude is going to choose Their broken down behinds, their baggage and their over a hottie who has potential and can give him legitimate children.

Seriously do we need the promote the dating of single mothers? Blah, blah, blah forgiveness, blah,blah, blah, second chance. Sorry, but most good brothers don't want to spend their lives being some woman's consolation prize or second best. Life is too short to be a Pullman porter carrying some woman's baggage.

A smart man will see this kind of woman and keep on walking. That's will be his good deed.

http://www.shawnsjames.blogspot.com
http://www.myspace.com/shawnsjames

[–] TheQuietStorm 12 years ago

That isn't always the case, shawn. I know men without kids who chose the single mom.

Million Dollar Baby Academy Award® Winner for Best Picture of 2004

[–] write2 12 years ago

The comment I'm going to make doesn't apply to all men but to quite a few. Men need to feel needed. They will opt for a woman with boo coo baggage to satisfy that "I'm her savior mentally". Too often a strong,educated woman who can stand on her own financially is overlooked because a man needs to stroke his Mr. Fix It ego. People in general would do better in relationships if they understood someone wanting you in their life is better than someone needing you in their life.

[–] shawnjames_2000 12 years ago

First rule I learned when I was fifteen is don't be a second stringer. Most guys who hook up with single mothers wind up being benchwarmers watching the play on the field, but never getting in the game.

If a female got kids and a baby daddy she is SUFFICIENTLY OBLIGATED in my eyes. She is emotionally unavailable to you and will not be able to share and commit with you in the relationship because she is sharing and committing with someone else. Baby Daddy will always be a part of her life.

A dude walking into a relationship like this is usually gonna wind up disappointed Big time. She uses him like an ATM while she continues her hot mess with Baby Daddy. And usually she's spending HIS money with that dude.

Everything is usally cool until he breaks up with her and winds up on the hook for Child support. Yep, if you stay with a Baby Mama you're going to be forced to pay Child support for kids that ain't yours.

But Tyler Perry loves to promote dysfunciton as normal. This sounds like Captain-Save-A-Hoe, a situation most real men avoid like disease.

http://www.shawnsjames.blogspot.com
http://www.myspace.com/shawnsjames

[–] goody_goody10157 12 years ago

shawnjames, that is such a narrow-minded, stereotypical point of view, how can you say that all woman who have kids will use a man like an ATM and have drama with her baby daddy? I know plenty of woman who have kids and have met men without kids and have not done any of the things you mentioned in your post. While I do think that some woman can be that way, that is definitely not every woman with kids, you should stop generalizing so much.

"I'm just a girl from a trailer park with a dream"
-Hilary Swank

[–] great_one_32789 12 years ago

Shawn I agreed with you up until now because you seem bitter towards women. I guess your stereotype among single women are from the your "Own" experiences.

[–] shawnjames_2000 12 years ago

Not bitter towards women. I speak from experience. So that deflection technique will not work here.

I grew up in a single parent home in the 1980s. I Lived around single mothers all my life in the South Bronx and I grew up with kids from these homes. It's a miracle I managed to finish high school and graduate college in an environment as toxic as this.

All single parent homes breed are criminals, thugs, and illiterate junior high school dropouts in most cases. As a kid in the South Bronx I saw many men drop like dominoes because of the dysfunctional values they learned living in single parent homes.

The women have contempt for their sons because they see their fathers in them. This resentment prevents them from supporting their boys and giving them the guidance they need to become men of character. Moreover, these women speak badly about the father in front of their sons and spew venom about Black men and Black manhood because of their failed relationships and emotional baggage. Their contempt for Black men creates a self-fulfilling prophecy

Males who come from single parent homes are directionless and because they lack the leadership of a father to show them an example of what Black manhood is.

Women who come from homes like this are just...Off the chain WRECKS. Because they do not see an example of Black manhood, they look for love with extremely dysfunctional men. This is why the daughter becomes just like the mother, A baby mama with children from two and three different men.

Single mothers are the root cause of most of the dysfunction in the Black community.

Tyler Perry's Captain Save-A-Hoe is nonsense to me. No rich dude is going to date a single mother and wind up on the hook for some child support for a kid that ain't his.

Sorry I don't promote single mothers and I don't support the idea of men getting involved with single mothers. I've lived around it for close to 20 years and dudes who date single moms often wind up bitter and disillusioned. Single mothers are EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE because they are STILL involved in a relationship with their child's father.

Any man who gets involved with her impedes his legitimate rights to be involved with his children. In today's Matriarchal media we forget that the Father has rights too. And he has a say over who is involved with his children.

To me Single mothers are are SUFFICIENTLY OBLIGATED to make their relationships work with that Baby daddy before getting involved with someone else. They made their beds, now they can lie in them.

We need to promote the unity of familes.

http://www.shawnsjames.blogspot.com
http://www.myspace.com/shawnsjames

[–] shawnjames_2000 12 years ago

Just saw the trailer. And I stand by my statement. It's Captain-Save-A-Hoe: The Movie.

http://www.shawnsjames.blogspot.com
http://www.myspace.com/shawnsjames

[–] Hurry_up_N_buy 12 years ago

You're a realist, and that's cool. But, your generalizations make you seem ignorant. And, as someone else pointed out, who said that he ends up with the single mother? The trailer surely didn't.

I have no kids. I was in a 3 year relationship with a single mother and I sure wasn't "saving a hoe." Paid my half of the rent, put food on the table, and occasionally bought gifts, that's it. It was basically split down the middle. Besides that, her ridiculous baby father did his part in providing for their son.

______________________________________________
don't watch me with those eyes.

[–] baran_erik 9 years ago

So, according to you, if you date a single mother and break up with them, you'll be on the hook for child support? In what universe? And if there is a Baby Daddy of record, he is the de facto father, the mother can't double dip.

[–] leelee_206 12 years ago

To some degree i agree with you. Lots of women lookin for meal tickets. But i know plenty of women who are lookin to be taken care of WHO DON'T have any kids! You should be blaming ridiculous shows like Basketball wives and all the Real Housewives shows.

[–] great_one_32789 12 years ago

I agree Shawn however, you have to realize that his major target audience is women especially black women.

[–] Amma24 12 years ago

Captain-Save-A-Hoe

Really? Bitter much? You are name-calling and pointing the finger at women when it should be pointed at men too. Men do it too. They mooch off of women and also have children. Sometimes being single parents isn't a choice for both women and men. Sickness, death, etc.

Seriously do we need the promote the dating of single mothers?

Oh boy . First, it's not a crime. Second, the trailer did not indicate in any way that he dates the single mother.

First rule I learned when I was fifteen

Ahhh, that explains everything!

Gotta love double standards.

[–] anthropo 12 years ago

[–] shawnjames_2000 12 years ago

My "generalizations" don't make me sound ignorant. I speak from experience. Here in the South Bronx, Dudes who play Captain-Save-A-Hoe usually wind up extremely disappointed when the woman smashes them in the face with kryptonite laced doo doo.

Dudes need to understand that single mothers are emotionally unavailable to them. I dont' care how much money you have, how nice you are, or how much time you spend with her this woman's heart will NEVER be there for you. Why? because part of it belongs to her kids and her Baby Daddy. They have the emotional connection with her, you have NOTHING. You can't have a commitment in a relationship with someone who is sufficiently obligated emotionally and mentally to someone else.

Dudes need to ask: Where's her time for you when she has a man and kids already?

Now most Cap'n save a hoes (Simps) will try to do things to get in with a woman with kids but they don't know that they're being played by women who just have an exaggerated sense of entitlement. These sistas love to play the victim and take advantage of brothers with fat wallets and bleed them dry. But because dudes are so caught up in the emotional drama, they can't see the game being run on them.

While they pay for her kids and all her bills, she's spending her money on Baby Daddy's sneakers, car rims and leather jackets "to help him out" In most cases she's still screwing this dude and HIM at the same time.

Then dudes wind up in fights with baby daddy (or Baby Daddys) as they try to establish themselves as disciplinarians and leaders in their households they're paying for. Cause Baby daddy ALWAYS show up when a man is trying to take care of his business in his home. Why? Cause the kids are gonna call him and use him and baby mama when they're trying to get their way. It's a lose-lose situation for a man especially when puberty arrives and these manipulative kids start mastering the victim game they learned from mama.

In a lot of cases the conflicts between baby daddy and a man can escalate from heated arguments to violence. I've seen dudes get JACKED up in fistfights, around here. Some dudes even get sliced up. I've read about dudes who got shot and stabbed fighting with aBaby daddy over the discipline of his kids.

The fun part is when Baby Mama takes HIS side and starts attacking the man. Why? Because she was USING that dude to make Baby daddy JEALOUS to KEEP her relationship with her. That's right women will do anything to keep a relationship with baby daddy even making him an enemy. Because as long as she can get a reaction out of dude, there's still a glimmer of hope she can get him back and they'll live happily ever after.

And when a dude realizes he's just a pawn in her game, and finally wises up (several drama filled years later) then extricates himself from this HOT MESS, They wind up on the hook for child support for another man's kids. The courts in this Matriarchal society don't care who you are, if you were paying for the kids they make you KEEP paying for them.

Usually by this time, they wind up fathering Baby #2 and wind up stuck with child support payments they have to make for their kids.

I really don't like seeing this crap being promoted in the Black community because I know it leads to dysfunction and creates dysfunctional people. I know it leads to chaos. And it leads to out-of control kids who have no direction. Sorry, sistas, but there ain't gonna be a rich man like Tyler Perry coming to save you. If a dude is making that kind of money from a multi-generational family he ain't picking up no charity cases.

This kind of fantasy panders to women who don't know anything about how to have a healthy relationship. Tyler Perry loves exploiting gullible sistas with this nonsense. Sorry, but the best kind of Good Deed a men can do when it comes to single mothers is to KEEP ON WALKING.

Since I was 14 I knew not to date single mothers. From what I know in my neighborhood it's a lot of headache, a lot of drama, and a LOT of grief and heartache. Relationships are tough enough as it is, and life is too short to spend my time being a Pullman porter on the simp train carrying some chick's bags to the next station for the next dude to pick up.

But if that's how dudes want to live their lives cool. Take a ride on the Simp train and get played like a record. Don't say I didn't warn you when crap hits the fan in the pattern I described.

http://www.shawnsjames.blogspot.com
http://www.myspace.com/shawnsjames

[–] Hurry_up_N_buy 12 years ago

Word. However, your tone still suggest generalization. There's plenty of single mothers out there who are capable of engaging in an equally satisfying, loving relationship.

You're just hellbent on the small portion of hood-rat baby mothers, who commit devious and mischievous acts to anyone (besides their seed), for no other reason but selfishness and immaturity.

Your posts are just way too radical and seem to stem from dealing with crazies.

I live in the "hood," there's plenty of good single mothers out here, and even while some cant fully become emotionally available to a guy (because of some of the reasons you stated) they can still make the effort and be sympathetic to the needs of the man they're currently with.

I'm not naive, I know of the "hoe's" you speak of. However, that's not a MAJORITY of single black mothers.

And besides that, I don't think your assessment of Tyler Perry's message is correct. (Especially without having seen the movie in its entirety)

.............................................................................that's 100 characters

[–] nikkiten1979 12 years ago

Same can be said about Black fathers who leave the mothers and go sleeping around with as many tails as they can and ignore their sons. Sure blame the baby mama for being the son of an absent father. I heard a story about a 19 year girl who slept with her father both not knowing they were related - how did that happen? he was an absent father and has been fathering since he was 13 and had over seven children, didn't even know what his kids looked like because he refused to pay child support. his daughter gets pregnant with his kid and the doctors noticed there was something wrong with the baby. Blood tests showed the parents were related and it happens more often than you'd want to believe.

I have known a few men and women that came from a single parent home and they are doing more than fine.

(•_•)

can't outrun your own shadow

[–] michinine 12 years ago

Dudes need to understand that single mothers are emotionally unavailable to them.

You are coming from the standpoint, the father, ex is still in the picture. Somewhere, some when he shows up or even pays child support. And the women are all weak, uneducated, waiting for knights in shiny armor.

Not the whole world is like that. Not even remotely.

The woman depicted in the movie doesn't seem to get child support, father is completely gone. How in the world is such a woman "emotionally unavailable" when the other guy is never there, never shows up, never pays his dues? She must be delusional to wait that something happens.

My best friend had a relationship with a quite different of mother of two. Her ex was already re-married with a 10 year younger version of hers, and he took the kids every second week. She had nothing emotionally left for her husband who dumped her with an out-of-the-blue speak that his "affair" is pregnant and he will move in with her. JUST LIKE THAT, SUCK IT UP!

What type of human would still wait for the other one that behaved like that to come back? I wouldn't as man, and I don't believe a reasonable woman would either.

In some countries, the support for single women by the government is so good; that there is much discussion there that women there simply don't NEED serious relationships or even a second earner, reducing men to play with and have fun. In this societies, they have completely different problems. Its more like "Oh? She is single with kids? Ok, no twinky relationsship wise. Sorry man!"

I understand that the US black community has is own unique problems. But I rather give Tyler Perry the credit, that he wants to show something different with this story than dark chocolate superman flying in for help. Maybe, that black people can be as ignorant to poor people as white, that IGNORANCE doesn't "sees" color either.

[–] shawnjames_2000 12 years ago

Some of ya'll don't get what emotionally unavailable means.

It means a woman won't be there for you.
It means she can't pay attention to your needs because she's focused on taking care of someone else.

It doesn't matter if the baby daddy is there or not. The woman will always have feelings for him.

No matter what lies she tells a dude, she still has feelings about the relationship that failed and still harbors anger about it. Sometimes this anger is transferred to the kids, and sometimes it'll be projected at the man. Just make a woman mad and you'll see this.

She will always have feelings for the other man's kids. The kids will always come FIRST. Which means any man involved with her will come LAST.

For a man it means settling for a backseat behind everyone else. It means never getting all the love he should get from a relationship, never getting to form a close emotional bond, because she'll never let him get close to him. She's carrying so much baggage from the previous failed relationships that she will put up an emotional wall that's almost impossible to break down without professional help. Some of these females are in such denial about their problems that dudes don't see them until years later in the relationship.

And as a result of this emotional unavaliability dude dating the single mother, never gets his needs met. Most of the time a man involved with a single mother winds up carrying emotional baggage like a Pullman Porter from one station to the next being ridiculed, mocked and attacked.

Now some dudes love playing the SIMP role and putting the woman first, but real men don't go for that mess. They walk right by these ladies and their drama and live a happy life. Life is too short to be a second-string man for a third rate chick.

http://www.shawnsjames.blogspot.com
http://www.myspace.com/shawnsjames

[–] curryla_07 12 years ago

You sound like you're carrying some emotional baggage. Please get over whoever burned you and let all your idiotic theories go. It is very unattractive to see man be so petty and ignorant.
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the muffin shop is closed~saved!

[–] MovieFreak74 12 years ago

You might want to watch the movie. She's a widowed mother who lost a husband in Iraq. I'm sure there are many widowed single mothers after this last war. According to you, they're all whores who are looking for a hand out.

You must be a real catch....

The Fallen-DH Tribute (Spoilers!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-JUjowg3rAg

[–] RidiculousPasta 12 years ago

Did you even watch the damned movie? He fell in love with the woman who changed and bettered him as a person AND she changed and bettered him too.

They saved each other.

That was the point, that was the message. You people say you want him to stop preaching but when he makes it subtle it flies over your heads.

Stop being so ready to pounce on everything this man does and try actually enjoying the freaking movie. It's a movie, it's not your whole world. Always ready to kick this man in the teeth but then go pander to all the white directors who can somehow do no wrong. Even their worst movies get at least a 4.0 rating yet this gets a 2.5? Really?

How dare Tyler Perry actually try to create uplifting movies for black people. What an awful awful man.

[–] baran_erik 9 years ago

You know, you've posted essentially this same post on at least five other threads, and I've only read parts of about eight or nine threads. We get it, you don't like this movie, you don't like the "message". What's bothersome is that you see a homeless black single mother and automatically think "hoe". Her husband, a soldier, died in combat, how, exactly, does that make her a "hoe"? You're belittling Perry's movie making, yet succumb to prejudice and bigotry. Who's the better person? Hint; it ain't you.