MovieChat Forums > Bigfoot (2012) Discussion > Things I Learned from This Movie

Things I Learned from This Movie

posted 12 years ago by GreenInkBrigade
38 replies | jump to latest

1. The way to fight deforestation is to light the forest on fire.

2. Deadwood, South Dakota is a hotbed of '80s rock.

3. The thing about the '80s was that you could make mistakes and still live free.

4. Beer isn't a beverage (the sign said "Beer and Beverages").

5. Anyone with a cell phone makes an event.

6. South Dakota is so sparsely populated that giant monkeys can roam the forest and no one notices.

7. '80s flashback rock festivals in Deadwood, South Dakota have all the excitement of standing outside the doors waiting for the Costco to open.

8. Alice Cooper is the scariest guy in the world. [He doesn't always drink beer, but when he does, he drinks Dos Equis. Stay thirsty.]

9. Alice Cooper will perform small town festivals with a backing band that consists of some local guys who haven't rehearsed with him or even met him until the show ... and a cardboard snake.

10. And it's Alice Cooper between the uprights for 3 points.

11. Three dimensional perspective is an important thing to get right when making a movie using green screens.

12. Everyone's a victim, even Bigfoot.

13. When trying to propel your boat rapidly through the water, you should take short, choppy strokes.

14. 20' tall apes walking through the snow leave footprints that look like they were spray painted on the ground.

15. Bigfoot's kind of a jerk.

[–] Frank371292 12 years ago

Bigfoot is a master of stealth, but only when he's off-screen.

[–] dreid234 12 years ago

Having 5 or 6 D list has been stars does not make a movie worth watching. I kept looking for Rueben Kincaid to make an appearance and get Danny out of this mess. What the hell happened to Sherilyn Fenn?!? I know getting old sucks but she looks like someone hit her in the face with a shovel.

[–] VariaIronhawk 12 years ago

What the hell happened to Sherilyn Fenn?!? I know getting old sucks but she looks like someone hit her in the face with a shovel.

This. I also learned Bigfoot looks a lot like the abominable snowman from Rudolph, except in brown. Man, where is Hermie when you need him?

[–] dreid234 12 years ago

Even Hermie had the sense to pass on this turd.

[–] crysjumar 11 years ago

"Rueben Kincaid" LOL - classic.

-We Provide.....Leverage

[–] clacton0 10 years ago

Not to set up a concert and loudspeakers in the wild it will draw Bigfoot out and he will come after and eat you.

www.youtube.com/eastangliauk

[–] Rum-Ham-Revenge 12 years ago

you should turn off all the lights in your home at night so you don't upset a bigfoot.

I have to return some video tapes.

[–] dreid234 12 years ago

17. Even Bigfoot thinks Barry Williams' singing sucks.

[–] bkwormonthenet 12 years ago

#10 is priceless. I was thinking the same thing. I give the movie credit for making me laugh on that one.

_______________________________________

I'm just trying to get back to my home planet.

[–] gerryf19 12 years ago

When Big Foot attacks, a half gallon of gas poured on the ground 9 inches from a cop car creating four foot high wall of flame six feet wide will scare him off--oh, and light it with a cgi flare that looks like a sparkler

[–] gerryf19 12 years ago

When shooting a 20-foot tall monster with semi-automatic military weapon from approximately 20 feet away, make sure you use the scope so you don't miss him.

[–] muyguapogrant 12 years ago

- South Dakota is in the pacific northwest

-They'll still allow tours at Rushmore even during times of murderous giant apes

-In South Dakota the weather will change from sunny with no snow on the ground, to blizzards with a foot of snow on the ground, often in the same shot.

[–] aucarter 12 years ago

18. South Dakota makes statues of a Partridge Kid and a Brady Kid together!

19. The National Guard always defers to a local almost-Sheriff, even though she has no valuable information, no pertinent experience or any military connections.

20. Bigfoot thinks Humans are bugs that need to be squashed (Seriously, how much stomping was going on here?)

21. When shooting at a hugh beast has no results, by all means, continue to shoot at it! Did the South Dakota National Guard forget where they placed their Rocket Launchers?

22. When we make the scientific discovery of the century of a Cryptozoid, we should immediately destroy it - even at the cost of an irreplaceable National Monument. And never ask the question "What happens when a Papa Bigfoot loves a Mama Bigfoot?"

[–] SBL84 12 years ago

19. The National Guard always defers to a local almost-Sheriff, even though she has no valuable information, no pertinent experience or any military connections.

Hell, they even let Danny Bonaduce and his buddy through because "We're hunters, the sheriff asked us to help out."

And why was he the one talking to them? His buddy said that they might recognize him because of his radio show, and his response was that they wouldn't know what he looked like. So he's the one that decides to speak for them, even though his voice is what he's most known for.

[–] aucarter 12 years ago

And then the National Guard immediately recognizes his Voice!
I was laughing so hard, I nearly spit up my drink!

[–] temporarypeace 12 years ago

23. Trained soldiers from the National Guard will immediately start firing their machine guns when they are spooked from behind. They will also continue firing at the target even when they realize it's not Bigfoot, but a citizen on their side.

24. Bigfoot supposedly smells like "garbage".

25. Local musicians will let you use their guitar as a weapon to settle a dispute in a bar. They will also not care if you destroy it.

26. All tree-hugging environmentalists are young females, with the exception of their leader, who is a much older male. This male leader will not care how many of the young females die for the cause, as long as nature is safe.

27. Bigfoot only likes to destroy CGI vehicles, but will leave the real ones alone.

28. The drummer for Alice Cooper's band does not actually hit any of the drums/cymbals during a live performance.

29. As long as you only shoot darts at Bigfoot, he will try to save your life if you are hanging off a cliff.

30. Having an early snowstorm really confuses Bigfoot, to the point where he'll get so frustrated that he will go on a rampage and murder everyone he sees.

31. Bigfoot loves to eat human heads.

32. A great place to try and capture Bigfoot is a cul-de-sac.

[–] 12 years ago

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[–] temporarypeace 12 years ago

35. If you're a girl at a concert, you'll go into the woods and pee in the middle of a path, instead of using a porta potty that's nearby.

[–] ydobon-1 12 years ago

35. If you're a girl at a concert, you'll go into the woods and pee in the middle of a path, instead of using a porta potty that's nearby.

There was a line at the porta potties and nobody would let her cut. This movie was bad, but I didn't have a problem with that part.

[–] Mr. OpEd 12 years ago

No one in Deadwood bleeds. You can bite their heads off, tear them in half, throw them a mile, squish them to pulp, and there's no blood. If anything, when they're ripped apart they look like claymation dolls.

[–] tody711 12 years ago

If you are chased by a bigfoot do not crouch down in a giant bigfoot foot print... as you will surely get squashed.
Don't play 80's music as you will upset bigfoot.

[–] VariaIronhawk 12 years ago

I wondered about that myself. So much squishing and biting and no blood. It should have had as much gore as a gator or shark movie!

[–] lostboytx 12 years ago

If you're a detective in one city and you go to another city to get your dead father's things together, you're automatically a police officer.

The Asylum's costume department doesn't have a cop uniform in Sherliyn Fenn's size. (XXXL?)

If some guy is dogging you for having slept with your mom, wait until the end of the movie to reveal that you slept with HIS mom. "I played ball in the house."

[–] heilmanlynn 12 years ago

Don't smoke or you'll die first.

[–] Mccadoo 12 years ago

36. everyone in the world has modern CGI software these days, except for the SyFy channel. This movie had the worst special effects I've seen since the 70's. Except for the last Bigfoot movie I saw.

37. If you're going to go down river (and it was really more of a stream) to get video of Bigfoot it's a good idea to use a rubber boat you bought at Walmart for $19.95.

38. If your friends are going to go down river in a $19.95 rubber boat they bought at Walmart to get video of bigfoot and you think it's a really bad idea and refuse to go, it is then a good idea to hang around in the immediate area so you can get killed too.

39. Cynthia Geary has aged a hell of a lot better than Sheryln Fenn has!

40. The wardrobe department apparently doesn't stock police uniforms sized "bowling ball with a head".

41. Alice Cooper will do anything for a paycheck, including allowing himself to be punted.

42. The Brady Bunch guy has aged a hell of a lot better than the Partridge Family guy but neither one has spent any money on acting lessons

43. When you're going after a 20 foot badly animated fake bigfoot it's a good idea to carry a small caliber military assault rifle, just to piss him off.

[–] mulligan2 12 years ago

44. Despite being bigger than a house, Bigfoot can run down the road and not damage the asphalt at all.
45. Bigfoot can also run through town and change his size so that he can slip under the power lines.
46. Danny Bonaduce can take several hits to the face without getting a single mark. Barry Williams, on the other hand, gets marked up after just one hit.

[–] 12 years ago

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[–] 12 years ago

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[–] willjohn 11 years ago

1.You can have an affair with the mother of a man 5 years older than you and still be cool.

2. Believing George W Bush was not quite the most stupid thing Alice Cooper did this century.

[–] ydobon-1 12 years ago

In movies, Barry Williams can beat up Danny Bonnaduce, despite having his ass handed to him by Bonnaduce in real life (celebrity boxing).

When talking to someone on a walkie talkie, you only hear one side of the conversation, just like with a phone.

When you find a weapon that's effective against a giant Bigfoot, like a tank cannon, never use it again.

A couple of tiny bullet holes in the fabric of an ultra-light plane will cause it to crash.

When going into the woods to hunt Bigfoot, you don't need to double-check your supply of tranquilizer darts.