MovieChat Forums > 13 Reasons Why (2017) Discussion > The counselor was the biggest screw up

The counselor was the biggest screw up

posted 7 years ago by Boricanator (1365)
14 replies | jump to latest

To me he is the worst, because he is the adult and is supposed to know how to handle that situation.

Telling a rape victim to simply move on is the worst thing you could do. Hannah was an underaged girl that was raped and you could tell she was severely disturbed.

As soon as she accepted she was raped, he should have been more forward about getting her to report the crime to the police. He should have comforted her and tell her that she was not alone and would help her every step of the way. I am not sure how confidential a school counselor meeting is, but maybe he could have alerted her parents that something was up.

Instead he showed he was uncomfortable with the situation and simply wanted to wash his hands. He didn't care and he was the only one that is paid and trained to care.

That scene made the lawsuit 100% justifiable.

[–] Kewl_Kat (226) 7 years ago

The thing is, Hannah never told him that she was raped. So how was he supposed to know? He didn't handle things perfectly but if Hannah wasn't such a lunatic, maybe she could have expressed herself more effectively. If she would have been sober instead of all drunk at that party, perhaps she would have stopped the rape she witnessed and Bryce would have gone to jail instead of making Hannah his next victim. If you see something, say something. That doesn't just apply to Muslim terrorists. If people would have said something about Trump's rapes years ago, we wouldn't be in this mess.

[–] winslow (1318) 7 years ago

He wasn't uncomfortable talking to her about it, from the beginning you can see he is peeling back layers until she breaks down. He probably could have gotten to her if he had more time and less interruption. His home situation was stressing him out, it caused him to miss some important cues in that conversation and try to rush the process. She felt like she had to make a decision then and there to call her parents, call the cops. The scene with Clay and Jessica was similar, except Clay didn't push her. He just told her he wanted to go after Bryce, but he would do whatever she wanted to do.

[–] Catbookss (13664) 7 years ago

I mostly agree, and also agree with Winslow that he was too rushed in talking with her.

In ways I understand why he got to the point of telling her her only remaining choice was to move on. She didn't want to file a complaint, report it to the police, or pursue criminal charges. So all that was left was for her to move on, but that's much easier said than done, and didn't offer her counseling on how to "move on." Hell, most adults don't know how to move on past traumas, so how would a kid?

I don't recall him offering her any of the empathy, compassion, and validation the victim of any trauma needs to even begin to move into being able to move on, or be strong enough to file a report and pursue prosecution.

He was undertrained and not equipped to do the job he was supposed to be there to do.

[–] Boricanator (1365) 7 years ago

I think you hit home with your last line. The guy wasn't trained to handle that situation. I am not even sure what was his purpose in the school. All they said was that he was a counselor. At one point he was advising students in terms of academics and college. Then he is giving therapy?

If his function included helping students emotionally, then he should have been a trained psychologist or psychiatrist. My guess is that the school didn't have one since, Hannah went to him as a last resort.

I strongly believe that a fully trained profesional would have been able to prevent her suicide.

[–] Janzeltov (8) 7 years ago

I suppose he is some sort of confidant which students can talk about. We have something similar at our university as well. You can talk to them about a whole range of things, like academics but also about private stuff you are coping with. The thing is, a counselor like him should send you to a psychologist or psychiatrist when there is some sort of indication, but I suppose he didn't really see how bad it really was.

But I agree, if he was trained more properly he should've been able to see the cues and go more in depth with the conversation. Although I must say Hannah wasn't really giving him much to go on and didn't want to say if she was raped and by who. The fact that she doesn't really tell him anything but wants him to come after her when she get's out of the office is really weird. She should've opened up to him since she did want to be helped.

[–] Boricanator (1365) 7 years ago

She didn't give him much, because he failed to make here feel comfortable to open up. He was distracted by the phone, looked really awkward and practically told her it was her fault (saying she did something with a boy that she regretted). Then he just brushed it off and told her to move on.

That is why she included him in the list of people that didn't "care enough".

This was a major blunder.

[–] [email protected] (1288) 7 years ago

He was my least favorite character. I really didnt like him. Monotone, and just lazy in his insights to say the least.

[–] Freakflag1 (125) 6 years ago

He absolutely failed her. Wasn't he only a part-time counselor and was mostly a teacher filling in for the real counselor?

I'm a counselor and we are trained to spot warning signs in kids. Hannah displayed numerous signs, and basically said she was suicidal without even having to say it. Her demeanor, her statements of feeling empty, her evasiveness, her hints that she had been assaulted..any trained counselor would have immiediately picked up on her depression and intervened.

A good, trained counselor would have immediately picked up the phone and notified her parents. Probably would have brought her back to his office to just sit until her parents arrived. But he was I think a teacher, and had no clue how to handle her appropriately.

I see this a lot..teachers who think they are mental health pros and but fail to spot signs counselors would know and also fail to follow protocol. I've known kids to report they are suicidal to teachers and the teachers never phone home or tell anyone..teachers usually don't even know when or even want to report to cps in abuse cases.

This is why schools need trained counselors

[–] Eddym123 (156) 6 years ago

No, You are wrong. I am also questioning if you are indeed a councelor. From the start it seems as if she really already made up her mind about committing suicide. She needed another scapegoat to solidify her justification for killing herself. A person who wanted help would not go into their meeting with a recorder. When she first sat down before getting anywhere she attempts to leave and he stops her. When she makes her cryptic "wanting it all to end" line he latches on and tells her that seems like a very serious(suicide) thing to say. Hannah replies that she was NOT suggesting that as it was not that(suicide) extreme. She proceeds to allude to being assaulted and he ignores his phones as he is very concerned and to verify that it was not consensual proceeds to ask specific questions for verification. She tries to leave and he wants her to stay. He wants to know how she wants to proceed and say's she will only turn to authorities and parents IF he promises that upon naming the individual he will go to jail and she would never see him again. So she asks him to promise something he has no control over therefore tying his hands. This is the same girl who wanted others to read her mind and as distraught as she was supposed to has these meticulously made revenge tapes. He tells her that he can't make such promises and without a name can't proceed legally. With hardly any information and the refusal to involve the authorities or parents he tells her that she can move on with life and she balks at this idea. He is far from finished and when he was going to supply her with other resources she leaves in tears. However, immediately after departing and not a tear in her eye she talks into her recorder and says he would not going to help and that her fate is sealed in very calculated manner as she successfully added another scapegoat. Hannah had the power in the outcome of their meeting and scheming bitch refused to meet him half way.

[–] Freakflag1 (125) 6 years ago

Oh I agree she was sort of selfish. And also that she had made her mind up. But she was also mentally ill, very depressed, and not thinking clearly.

You ask any counselor, they'll tell you the same thing I did. He didn't do a suicide assessment, even after knowing she was suicidal and depressed. She didn't have to say it...she displayed strong signs.

Any time a kid alludes to suicide with the demeanor she had and backtracks, that's a warning sign and should be taken seriously.

She alluded to assault..which he kind of accused her of provoking, but he also failed to inform her parents.

I always tell my clients if they're hurting someone, someone is hurting them, or they're hurting their own selves...I notify guardians, and make other appropriate calls to agencies as needed.

Their safety is more important to me than them getting mad at me for telling someone. He should have contacted her parents and notified them that she alluded to assault and displayed strong signs of depression and suicidal ideation.

Any counselor would tell you the same thing when dealing with minors. Look up counselor ethics if you don't believe me.

There was a case similar to this show, where the counselor didn't report to parents that their child was suicidal..in fact, that counselor didn't do it just once...I think she failed to report two or three kids, who all ended up committing suicide, or went on to attempt it. She got sued and fired.

You never know what adolescents will or won't do..that's why you ALWAYS notify guardians in cases like this.

[–] Eddym123 (156) 6 years ago

I still see you do not understand and ignored several elements to stick to your opinion. Suicide was mentioned and she balked at the suggestion. You insist that she was displayed being suicidal but when it was brought up she apologized for making it sound that serious otherwise he would have taken more direct actions and her demeanor was no more different or severe than a kid who was merely upset about something not as serious. He was not accusing, he was asking questions to know if it was defiantly a rape lest he get ahead of himself and accuse an innocent person.I have spoken to actual counselors who agree with what I have said and they also mention that they really are not able to do anything without a name. We are talking about a person who killed herself immediately after the meeting. We know this was not the end and that he was going to bring her back in as he was not shown to give up on those he was concerned about. He obviously did not see any sighs of a true suicidal person and if he did he would have acted.All he heard was her make a possibly cryptic line that she dismissed as him misunderstanding the severity. Also, she was adamant that he not bring it to authorities or parents. If he goes against her wishes and she is confronted, what makes you think she wouldn't kill herself then? You keep throwing this idea that he knew she was suicidal and did nothing, that is not the case. And I would like to know of this case where 3 students killed themselves while seeking guidance from a counselor. He did not think her safety was at risk and therefore had not reason to act. She wasn't sort of selfish, selfish was an element ingrained into her personality. Stop trying to rationalize bad character traits with mental illness and depression.

[–] Freakflag1 (125) 6 years ago

How old are you? I hope you are not an adult who works with teens.

Teens lie. If a kid came in with a demeanor like Hannah and alluded to assault, I'd be on the phone asap with guardians, notifying them she displays signs of depression and suicide, and that she alluded to assault but wouldn't give a name.

It doesn't matter if the kid doesn't want you to call authorities or parents ---they're kids and don't know what's best. You should ALWAYS notify parents or guardians.asap. You don't respect their wishes to be left alone!

You intervene! Parents can then get them help they need.

You are very misinformed and seem very young.

[–] Freakflag1 (125) 6 years ago

https://www.schoolcounselor.org/magazine/blogs/september-october-2013/suicide-err-on-the-side-of-caution

This plainly states school counselors must report any and all suspicions or factual info if a student is depressed or suicidal. Hannah clearly displayed signs of depressions. Her backtracking is a typical sign of what teens do. Doesn't mean you ignore it and say it's not serious.

He had every reason to call and didn't.

But I don't think he was even a trained counselor, just a teacher filling in?

[–] Alex (1477) 6 years ago

Maaaan, Y it always gotta be Black guy's fault?
Its all the goddamn ringing and phone calls kept distracting the Counselor tho.

Some asshole on the other line that we never even get to see IS THE TRUE perpetrator of Hannah demise.