100 things I learnt from After Earth
Every bad movie deserves one of these and in case this movie already has one, it deserves another.
1. After we leave earth we will build our spaceships from bamboo and plastic cling wrap. They will be very roomy and use brushes for curtains.
2. There will be no breathable air on earth after humans have left it even when the place is covered with trees and the other animals survive.
3. The technology used to turn Bilbo's sword blue when surrounded by Orks is used in the future to make suits turn black when there's danger.
4. When the people have gone it will get really cold at night but magically warm up again next morning. This is because the humans took the heat retaining properties of water with them when they left.
5. In the future you can base jump without a parachute.
6. If you only have a limited number of vials of precious medicine and some of them get broken then it is always better to use the unbroken ones rather than trying to retrieve anything from the broken ones first.
7. There will be lots of volcanic activity in the future. This is because the earth needs to provide warmth for the animals at night.
8. If you have a futuristic black suit you can outrun a group of angry apes even if they are running and jumping twice as fast as you.
9. The best futuristic weapon to kill a huge blind monster that only wants to kill humans, is a blade.
10. The pods used to contain said huge blind monsters are bigger on the inside than on the outside.