Best Quotes?


Put some of your best quotes below and we can all have a laugh...again!

As if it's really necessarily, but there could be spoilers within this thread!

Hawke: "Wounded Coast... I wonder if that's near the Injured Cliffs... or the Limping Hills... the Massive Head-Trauma Bay. ... No one? .... Just me? ... Forget I said anything."

The male human prostitute: I'll let you roll for inititive. and I am a repeatable encounter, you know.

Anders if he comes to live with you to the dog: You know, now that I'm living here there's no room on the bed for you.
Dog: *whine*
Anders: Now, don't get sore. Maybe you can cuddle up with Sandal in his bed.
Sandal: Yay!

After Anders lives with you and you examine the lute in your bedroom: Anders has many talents but the lute isn't one of them.

Fiona: Eff you.
Steve: I love you too.
--Shameless

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Varric, after Bartrand abandons the party in the Deep Roads: "I swear I'm going to find that sorry son of a b**** - sorry, Mother! - and kill him!"

Hawke: Hard in Hightown: Siege Harder. What does that even mean? Varric must be stopped.

Varric trying to give Fenris tips on hiding: "You could try wearing something that didn't scream 'I hate you all, I was a slave.'"

Varric, to Fenris: Friend, if your brooding were any more impressive, women would swoon as you passed. They'd have broody babies in your honor.

Isabela: This is silly. I don't want to argue.
Fenris: Do you want to guess what color my underclothes are again?
Isabela: Oh, yes, that's much more fun.

Varric, to Aveline: Well how about a giant sign that just says "Don't"? You could hit people with it.

Varric: Dear Varric, please learn to parry. Love, your innards.

Somehow all my favorite lines seem to come from Varric. Go figure.


"You always know where the X-Men have been, because it's always on fire."
- Pete Wisdom

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LOL! Those are good! I missed out on Varric quotes because I never had him in my party. -.- Have to change that on my second go 'round since I'm not a rogue this time. lol There were more I dearly loved but I can't remember them (I always seemed to play late at night and have forgotten them...lol)

Fiona: Eff you.
Steve: I love you too.
--Shameless

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Oh my God, there are so many good quotes while you're on a quest with your party. Most of my favorites seem to involve Isabela.

(I'm paraphrasing this one, it's long)
ISABELA: I love your hair.
AVELINE: Oh... thank you! Most people lament being ginger.
ISABELA: No, it's pretty! Did you have pig tails when you were little?
AVELINE: Actually... yes. Yes, I did.
ISABELA: Ah, I can see it now. You, with your little ginger pigtails... and all of the boys, running and screaming for mercy.

And there is one great cutscene at the Hanged Man between Varric and Anders, when Varric asks him just why the hell he'd ever go anywhere called the Dead Marshes. Then Anders replies (something along the lines of), "Yes, I believe it's the 'marsh' part that really destroys any pleasant feelings. Let's see, Flower Marsh? Kitten Marsh? ... No, just doesn't work."

And this exchange practically made me spit out what I was drinking:

ISABELA: So, about that fisting thing you do--
FENRIS: Ummm... the what?
ISABELA: You know, when you stick you hand through people?
FENRIS: Oh, that. It's, ummm... one of my talents.
ISABELA: You could make so much coin doing that...







How's your head, David?
: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_-yBJ0YnZ0

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After some bad guy says that Hawke killed Mekel.

Hawke: "What's a Mekel?"

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''What's a Mekel?'' was my favouite line by far, it nearly had me crying from laughter when she said it lol.
I also really liked;
Hawke - 'That's the idol? It seems alot more sword like than I remember.'
Hawke - 'Shut up about Lothering, it's dead and burned, and you'll share the same fate if you don't start talking.
Hawke - 'Where are we going? I don't know. Do I look like the leader of gthis merry band of misfits?'

--
House: Hey Wilson! I'm gonna cut some cripples eye out, you wanna come watch?!
Wilson: Good Times

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If Orsino calls on you to investigate for "Best Served Cold":

Hawke: So you *don't* want me to slit my wrists and dance naked in the moonlight?
Orsino: Oh, well. In that case, maybe I will join you after all!



Random convo if you're in a relationship with Fenris:

[Merrill giggles]
Fenris: What? Why are you looking at me like that?
Merrill: You're in love.
Fenris: I am not!
Merrill: I see the way you look at her. Every time she looks away, you look at Hawke with those big sad puppy eyes.
Fenris: There are *no* puppy eyes.
Merrill: It's alright you know. Even you can be happy once in awhile. [pause] Though your face may crack if you smile, so be careful.

(Just FYI, there *are* puppy eyes lol when he's asking you, regardless of your relationship status, to go with him for his Act 3 companion quest. it's hilarious!)

It's just the way Merrill is laughing and stuff through it and then the last bit about the smiling, she's completely serious just cracks me up!

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Don't remember it exactly but something to the effect of :

Fenris: Why don't you have a beard?
Varric: (something sarcastic about being a surface dwarf)
Really: Really? I just thought it fell off and landed on your chest.

I nearly spit my drink all over my keyboard when I heard that. I didn't think such a grumpy elf could come up with that zinger.

"Alright look,there's only one Return okay... and it ain't of the King it's of the Jedi" - Randal

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If Varric is one of the ones you've taken with you into the Fade (his apology):

Varric: Anyway, I just want you to know: I would never choose a demon over you while conscious and sober.

Hawke: So I don't have to worry that you'll run off with a desire demon unless you're passed out drunk.

Varric: I can safely say, milady, if I'm passed out drunk, I'm not running off anywhere.

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(After the Dalish hunter insults Merrill and walks away on the recruit mission in Act 1)

Hawke: So... Sundermount is looking very mountainous today. Lots of rock, and... hillside.


How's your head, David?
: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_-yBJ0YnZ0

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During "Dissent"

Hawke: The Chantry frowns on templars who take personal advantage of their charges.
Ser Alrik: Who's this?
Varric: The Divine. Come all the way from Orlais, to tell you, personally, what a jackass you are.


Ah... where would this game be without Varric and his smart mouth? lol


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And, if you are using an imported DA:O game in which your Warden and Alistair became the King & Queen at the end.
(after Hawke meets with King Alistair in Act 3):

Alistair: Well, I guess it's time to get back to the old ball and chain
Teagan: You know the Queen hates when you call her that
Alistair: What? Just because she slew an archdemon, I'm not scared of her
Teagan: You just keep telling yourself that Your Majesty

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Varric: "Opinions are like testicles. You kick em hard enough, it doesn't matter how many you got!"

Isabela: "Apostate Prostitutes. Apostitutes!"

Hawke, after Anders professes his undying love: "Want a sandwich?" :)))

"No sense makes sense."

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Varric says to Donnic something along the lines of, "Should I draw you a picture of the parts of you she [Aveline] wants to touch?"

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^ "I'll draw you a picture of where she wants you to touch her."
I agree, great line.

Another excellent Varric zinger is when you have to apprehend that Emile de Launcet runaway mage at the Hanged Man, and he starts telling you his life's story about how he's never been able to do anything for himself, not even kiss a girl, etc.

VARRIC (grimacing): Can I kill him? Please? He's hurting me...





How's your head, David?
: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_-yBJ0YnZ0

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My most recent playthrough has been as an aggressive rogue, and there are some real zingers with aggressiveness.

There are two instances of automatic dialogue based on past aggressive choices that are hilarious. One is at the start of Act 2, when Isabela jokingly asks if you want to buy her a drink. My Hawke immediately replied, "Buy your own drinks." It was so abrupt, and Isabela was like, "Well, if you're gonna act like that!"

Another great one is when Isabela and Aveline are both at the Hawke estate, and Isabela is about to slap Aveline, Hawke charges into the room and goes, "Everyone, shut up!"

But the best is when that Mekel guy wants to kill you rather than give you the note about the Gem of Keroshek. I chose the double-sword option, and Hawke said, "You have three seconds to give me that note or I start cutting off your toes!"




How's your head, David?
: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_-yBJ0YnZ0

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