Absolutely no sympathy for...

[deleted]

I think that her manipulative behavior and unhappy life is based on how the Russian aristocracy worked back then, like an 19th century game of thrones.

I'm not a huge fan of her, myself, but I don't think she's meant to be sympathetic as much as a pitiable train wreck. You see, Karenin is not the villain a casual movie-watcher would assume. His first thought, on finding out that she was having an affair, was to allow it to continue and turn a blind eye as long as Vronsky never came to the house, because he was well aware of the scandal that would affect not only them, but Seryozha, as well, if they divorced.

Anna, at this point, to ease her conscience, has begun to tell herself that her husband, who she knows to be a bit shy and socially awkward outside of a political arena, is able to do this because he feels nothing. He's not human. So, husband and wife are both cracking under the strain of keeping up a pretense of civility in front of everyone, but Anna, heavily pregnant and not able to go out and see Vronsky, breaks the rules and calls her lover to the house to both subject him to a jealous interrogation about his comings and goings without her, as well as cry on his shoulder about nightmares she's been having. Vronsky enters the house just as Karenin is leaving, they meet in the door.

Karenin, reaching the end of his tolerance, determines that he'll get a divorce and take Seryozha away from his scandal-ridden mother. Anna's brother and sister-in-law, knowing that this will ruin Anna, talk him out of it for her sake. He finally agrees to stop proceedings when Anna calls him to what they all assume is her death bed. Forgives her, and even takes it upon himself to see that her illegitimate daughter, a Karenin by law, is properly cared for while Anna recovers. The poor man honestly wants nothing more in life at that point but to be left in peace with his wife and children, away from society.

But Anna tells her brother that she literally hates Karenin for forgiving her, it makes her feel like a bad person. And here is the part where it all could have ended happily for her. Here is the part everyone always forgets when they talk about her "escaping" from the supposedly unfeeling Karenin and suffering for it. Karenin has forgiven her, he's trying to keep everything running smoothly, and Anna is lashing out more and more. He's bewildered, doesn't know how to fix it. Stiva says that he should let Anna go for her own sake, which he is initially reluctant to do on the grounds that if she and Vronsky aren't a true love match, one of them will tire of the other and then where will she be? And, if he does as suggested and gives Anna her son, as well, what about the boy's education and position in society, or in the new household? But, he is eventually persuaded.

Now, the thing about the divorce, and the reason everyone wanted to stop him in the first place, is that the adulterous party can never remarry. Had he pursued on the grounds of Anna's infidelity, she'd be left a fallen woman with nowhere to turn, no real security. But, in the spirit of forgiveness, Karenin offers her Seryozha, and says that he'll pursue a divorce on the grounds of his own infidelity. He was perfectly willing to risk his own good reputation by having people either think him unfaithful, or have them know him to be a liar for admitting to an affair he never had. Leaving himself disgraced and alone without even the children he loved, and no chance of ever marrying again.

Anna's guilty conscience, as well as the hatred she's forced herself to feel for him, won't let her be so indebted, so she abandons her son, takes the baby and goes. And taking the baby was also supremely selfish, for little Annie's sake. The daughter of a fallen woman who no one received in their home? No chance she's making a good match later on down the road. So, Anna's off having the time of her life and thinking nothing of how this affects either of her children, only that she's free and happy and in love.

Meanwhile, Karenin is trying to do her half of running the household and has a near nervous breakdown from grief, brought on by the most mundane of unpaid bills for a new hat -I think it was- that Anna had recently purchased, not to mention knowing that everyone is laughing behind his back, because some of them are barely concealing it to his face. And that's when Lydia swoops in with her creepy fixation on him and religious zealotry. He's broken and hurting, and she offers to help run the household. Plus, she's constantly praising him and elevating him to the status of a Christ-like martyr. And he was basically starving for some little bit of friendship and kindness, so it was easy for her to take over and get him dependent on her for both, and in turn get him over to her strict views of morality and Christianity.

So, when Anna starts really missing her son and writes for permission to see him, Karenin is completely baffled on what to do. It doesn't seem right to keep mother and child apart, but Lydia has already told the boy his mother is dead. He asks her advice, she soothes and coos and tells him it would be bad for Seryozha's mental state to see Anna again. That's when she sneaks in, but the visit is interrupted and cut short, and it's not nearly enough. She's lonely for her son, can't seem to find any interest in her daughter (post-partum, perhaps?) and Vronsky has been finding out the hard way that when you constantly pursue a woman who tries to do the right thing and turn you down, that when you finally get her that sexy forbidden mistress can turn into the jealous girlfriend from hell so now they're fighting and he seems to be losing interest. As a man, he's still received in society, able to come and go as he pleases, while Anna is publicly snubbed the few times she tries it. Not to mention she's addicted to morphine (that started out prescription) just to sleep.

The drugs and the jealousy start to take their toll, and what was once a cozy little love nest becomes a prison that society has confined her to. When Levin is at their house, Anna goes out her way to try and make him attracted to her, just to prove to herself she's still got it and that Vronsky would be seriously missing out if he ever left her. A divorce at this point wouldn't have saved anything except her reputation, or at least everyone is convinced that it's the case, that her remarrying would shut everyone up and make her respectable again. Vronsky wasn't going to leave her, but he wasn't exactly thrilled to still be there, either.

Anna has a fatally dramatic streak that makes her think the only love worth having is the grand, sweep you off your feet, romeo and juliet do or die kind, rather than the quiet familiarity and -strongly hinted- contentment she had beforehand. And Vronsky, having played into that with his declarations that the two of them were meant for just such a grand passion or nothing, basically feels honor bound to stay. There's still some love, there, but it's more often than not drowned out with all the fighting. She keeps trying for that divorce that will hopefully fix everything by completely tying Vronsky to her with marriage, but Lydia has already changed Karenin's mind on that. It's tragically ironic that as much as she obviously wanted him, the version of him she really wanted was the one she molded him into, and he wouldn't have been that version if he'd perjured himself in court. So, she can't let him do that and reminds him that true Christians don't divorce and it's better for Anna this way.

And we all know how it goes from there. Anna kills herself, Karenin takes back the other child he wanted to keep and Vronsky volunteers for a suicide mission. The movie sort of implies a happy ending for Karenin wherein he got the children and the quiet life he wanted, but there's no mention of that in the book. Instead, we're left to assume that after being constantly pulled back and forth by people concerned for Anna, and utterly overrun by the one person concerned for him, he's probably going to leave Annie's care and upbringing largely to Lydia, since he turned Seryozha's over to her already. Poor kids.