Whitney Cummings
She went in.
shareShe went hard on Pamela Anderson ........ the Magic Jackson joke though was not a home run
Yesterday is gone and Tommorrow is not here
Had to be at least a double for people over 27 years old.
shareWhen the other comics were roasting the roasters, she was practically ignored. I've never heard of her.
shareShe might have been a last minute replacement or addition to the show. I know that this happened with Jim Norton being added to one of the previous roasts last minute. When that happened no one really had any jokes written about him.
shareit was the same a few years ago when she was part of the roast,I think it's just because she's relatively unknown still,she's a comedian.
hO$tILiTy
Are you kidding me? That was hilarious.
sharenormally the best roast comes from the top 3. either lampanelli, giraldo, or ross.
but i think whitney stole this one from all of them. she was hilarious!!
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"I'M IDAHO!!" - Ralph Wiggum
normally the best roast comes from the top 3. either lampanelli, giraldo, or ross.
Who cares? He's a cheeseburger.share
I think she did a good job, nice tempo of the entire piece.
shareWhitney was good on the Joan Rivers roast last year too, when everyone was making jokes like "Whitney can answer the question: hey, who do you have to blow to get on one of these roasts?" Maybe because she's fairly new on the circuit people really don't have much on her. Gottfried really didn't get anything towards him either this time around.
DAMN you people this is GOLF not a ROCK CONCERT!
I had no idea who she was (still don't), but I did recognize her from Joan Rivers' roast. The girl is funny - the Magic Johnson joke had me roaring, and then again when she said it applied to Hulk's daughter. Hulk was a cool sport too - I've always liked him.
"Are you going to your grave with unlived lives in your veins?" ~ The Good Girl
She comes across as a Sarah Silverman wannabe. But a much angrier Sarah.
shareI liked her on the roast. She did a pretty good job. I think some of the stuff she said fell into the "Wow! I can't believe she said that" catagory moreso than funny catagory though. Her biggest strength was that she was fearless and really went for broke. But......After seeing her on the roast I really wanted to see more of her so I watched her COMEDY CENTRAL special and was kinda disappointed that her "regular" stand up is totally different. Her regular stand up act is very typical stuff and she doesn't really stand out much. I was expecting something edgier.
shareA lot of her jokes were actually cut out of the CC broadcast.
http://whitneycummings.tumblr.com/post/967024068/here-are-the-jokes-from-the-comedy-central-roast
(Some of these jokes actually were on the broadcast I saw).
Here are the jokes from the Comedy Central Roast of David Hasselhoff that didn’t make broadcast that I did on Howard Stern this morning.
Seth mcfarlane. You’ve officially done the impossible. You’re a multi millionaire, you’ve created successful shows, you can help my career, yet I still don’t want to *beep* you.
What a bunch of idiots. I haven’t seen this many dicks up close since pilot season.
Jerry springer, george Hamilton. Everyone up here is so old. I didn’t realize comedy central’s demographic was heaven.
Everyone is talking about how I gave sexual favors to be here. No. This is embarrassing. I’d blow someone to get off this show.
Jerry Springer? George Hamilton? I couldn’t blow anyone here if I wanted to–none of these men can get erections.
If I blew someone up here I wouldn’t be on comedy central I’d be on the history channel.
jerry springer, jeff ross, greg giraldo. This dias is so useless and gross, pam is probably going to try to *beep* it it.
Jeff Ross.
Jeff, why aren’t you successful? You’ve had so many chances to make it. Your career moves slower than lisa lampanellis metabolism.
I wouldn’t *beep* you if I was hulk Hogan and you were brooke Hogan.
Lisa lampanelli
lisa, you spend all this time talking about how you have sex with black guys. Nobody is having sex with you. Your vagina gets hit less than jeff ross’s IMDB page.
jerry springer
Everyone on your show is disgusting, ignorant, toothless, white trash. Basically everything pam needs to have an orgasm.
Pam Anderson
Pam and hoff worked together for a long time. You two are like a famous duo. You two are like Abbott and a slut with hepatitis.
Pam, Your vagina is like the finale of lost: 10 million people have seen it, everyone was disappointed, and everyone who was in it died.
Pam its ironic that you’re an animal rights activist. If you love animals so much why don’t you boycott your leathery face.
Pam, You’re like kate gosselin. You’re a old, you’re blonde, and you’re a fame whore. The only difference is the 8 babies that came out of your vagina were aborted.
Hulk Hogan
I have seen your daughter, Brooke Hogan. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. No, I mean she literally looks like she fell out of a tree.
Your daughter Brooke inherited a lot from you: her blonde hair, her tan skin, her dick.
Hoff
Hoff, you’re like george hamiltons dick. you don’t work.
You’ve spent years of your life on baywatch with pam Anderson, Carmen electra and yasmeen bleeth. If you don’t have genital warts, I think hepatitis c owes Tommy Lee an apology.
You’ve been around more herpes infested vaginas than a toilet at the kardashians house.
David hasslehoff is such *beep* actor that if there was a movie made about the life of david hasslehoff, the actor they’d hire to play him would be david hasslehoff.
Ive seen your music videos it seems like you’re trying to do an elvis thing with the swagger and deep voice. Too bad you didn’t go all the way with the elvis thing and have talent and kill yourself.
Hulk Hogan isn’t the only horrible father up here. hasslehoff has two daughters as well. Between the two of you you’ve brought more more dumb whores into the world than sarah palin.
She stole the show. She was hilarious.
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