MovieChat Forums > Occupant (2011) Discussion > 100 Things I learned watching Occupant

100 Things I learned watching Occupant

posted 12 years ago by keith-659
22 replies | jump to latest

Sorry, somebody had to do it.

1. Doormen (Joe) love to touch the knees and cheeks of potential tenants.
2. Joe will help you stay in apt for no apparent reason.
3. Luther is Luther.
4. Stalker chick shows up at day two... Slut..
5. Bargain basement employees give out addresses of employees. NY is friendly
that way.
6. You give your ATM card to the first Joe you meet.
7. Building managers demand immediate removal of tenants. None of this 30 day
eviction notice nonsense is needed.
8. Red is a cheery color.
9. Painter is painting 10+ story building, one can of paint at a time.
10.A small box of razor wire and razor cutter turns into hundreds of feet of
chicken wire and staple gun.
11.My grandma... Sooo many nails you keep in this apartment...
12.No Cable, No internet, No friends???

Help yourself to more, I'll add more later...

Oh I forgot.

51. Exterminators get rid of rats by spraying roach poison.

[–] tle-11 12 years ago

13. A DSLR camera can shoot videos forever.
14. All young boys know how to remove a memory card from a camera.
15. All Mac laptops can read memory cards.
16. When there is a massive hole in the wall, it's usually rats
17. Hot chicks love to have sex on second day.

[–] MissAnnThrope 12 years ago

18. Any hipster chick with a camera can invade your privacy and put it on the web without the risk of being sued.
19. Creepy doormen love to stick it to the man.
20. Stalker chicks are never dangerous, just slutty.
21. So many people are graduating with linguistic degrees in semiotics that in a city full of academics, you can only get jobs that even philosophy majors turn down.
22. Never, ever mess with a woman's shoes. Even if she's dead.
23. Cats are afraid of rats.
24. Exterminators are evil people.

[–] chaosbaron 12 years ago

25. Hot girls love to videotape themselves having sex with bizarre strangers
26. Cats are immune to rat poison
27. A man rolled up in a carpet in apt stairwell? Natural causes
28. Cameras have impossibly long battery life these days
29. Girls know when you have been to college with out asking... and that you are from Nebraska
30. If you are going to read a book, only read one sentance

[–] mlambert890-1 12 years ago

I've known plenty of people with much less useless degrees than semiotics have much worse jobs. It would have been more relaistic if he were homeless.

YouTube has about a million hours of video, many featuring people who had no interest in being filmed, and no one is getting sued. You can't sue if you are filmed in public unless it is for a share of any profits or for recovery of quantifiable damages

But overall yeah, this was a pretty stupid flick.

[–] trilbynhiss 12 years ago

Just once I'd like to see one of these movies where they don't kill the GD cat.

[–] Eve_of_Destruction 12 years ago

I agree.

Cici: "Oh, I'm sorry my bad, I thought you were someone else".
Ghost Face: "That's OK, I am"

[–] 12 years ago

[deleted]

[–] kwesterh 11 years ago

Seriously!!! Just ONCE can we see a movie in which the pet is alive the entire time?!?!

[–] edbevrr 10 years ago

I am also tired of every time there is a cat in one of these movies. SOOO predictable!!!!!

[–] edbevrr 10 years ago

Continuing previous post, I am soo tired of the cat being killed. Soo predictable!!!

[–] dedoc1967 12 years ago

31. A minimum wage retail job doesn't mind if you take two weeks off without prior notice.

32. A three bedroom/three bathroom luxury highrise with maid's quarters and a private laundry room in Manhattan was renting for $675 within the last 40 years.

33. Attorneys who never met you are willing to spend two weeks to get you an amazing deal on a rent-controlled apartment for only $500.

34. In a pinch, cat food can be a substitute for peanut butter.

35. Grocery stores and restaurants do not deliver in Manhattan.

36. Joe the doorman works 240 hour shifts.

37. Police in Manhattan have nothing better to do than show up late at night because of a noise complaint.

38. Any Semiotics major would know how to booby-trap a whole apartment.

39. Prepping a nail-studded door for impalement is a better means of suicide than, say, nail gun to the head or jumping out a 10 story window.

40. NYC has family members identify their dead at home rather than in a morgue or hospital.

[–] JessMazo-1 12 years ago

41. painters fall off the outside of buildings regardless of where they paint.
42. cats look like small chickens when cooked.
43. too much beef is not good so say JOE.
44. JOE's limit to carrying beer is 6 cases not 8.
45. Carrying 6 cases of beer is still pretty damned impressive.
46. A hole that reopens itself and eats an exterminator is probably no big deal.
47. NYC tap water is now extra brown.
48. In high end buildings the showers sometimes ooze brown slime.
49. Sometimes hipster chicks disappear after killed.
50. Granny has a lot of notches on her bed possibly from gettin freeaaaky! (no dissenting opinion was provided)

[–] sjd8886 12 years ago

51. When patching up a wall your standard sheet of paper will do
52. In NYC if you ride the subway enough, eventually a beautiful girl will follow you home to have sex with you
52-B. I must not ride the subway enough
53. When disposing of a dead body in a NYC high rise apartment building, and you have the options of using a gigantic hole in your wall or the steps, you use the steps and dont look back

[–] Benmovies 12 years ago

54. No matter how hard you smash your camera you will find it as brand as new inside a piano.
55. Gorgeous blogger girls will get you a bottle of whisky just to write their blogs.
56. Memory cards will have interference when used in horror movies.
57. When you are crazy your mirror reflection will stare at you when you are not watching.

[–] glassgrrl64 12 years ago

58. Causes of death are determined not by M.E.s at the morgue but by EMT types whilst grandma is still in her bed. Particularly as myocardial infarction is so easy to recognize externally.

(I enjoyed the atmosphere and general suspense of this movie, it's just too bad about so many piddly loose ends, and a vaguely sloppy ending. And yes, let the cat survive for once.)

[–] Gambitt 12 years ago

59. Digital camcorders make squiggly noises when you fast forward, just like audio tape recorders.

60. Desklamps come with 40-foot cords.

[–] Gambitt 12 years ago

61. If each of your efforts to paint your walls ends up looking like a woman's period, then yea, you're crazy.

[–] jabberttp 11 years ago

59-b. Some people will refer to Nikon DSLRs as "Digital camcorders". ;-)

---
"Into every life a little coffee must spill."

[–] 11 years ago

[deleted]

[–] MaeBeaBaeBea 11 years ago

60. When moving into your grandma's apt., you will have a roommate that appears in the credits but not in the film.

61. Elevator operators have keys to all the new locks just installed, and can also bypass a chain and a slidelock.

62. Elevator operators in NYC do not acknowledge your presence (except probably around Christmas).

63. Old ladies in NYC will not accept your offer of assistance, and also seem to have taken Elevator Operating 101.

64. Intrusive bloggers know you have a degree without asking.

65. Father and son neighbors wear the same bathrobes, coincidentally.

66. Older gay neighbor men cannot tolerate noise well, unless it is them making it.

67. Female corpses in rent controlled palaces evaporate.

68. Female bloggers do not notice menacing silhouettes of men while nosing around.

69. Grandmas leave rosaries next to mysterious openings in walls just to mess with your head.

70. Doormen refer to themselves in the 3rd person, and like to get touchy feelie close to new tenants who don't seem to notice.

71. One can of cheery red paint will brighten up an entire city block worth of rooms.

I have two tickets to crazy town. Who wants one?

[–] soggybottom 10 years ago

72. If you're a total nut-job determined to barricade yourself in your apartment and kill anyone who gets in your way,

72a) Find a hot chick who enjoys stalking you and feels compelled to follow you home and let you immediately split her like wet pine

72b) Make sure the doorman is completely on board and is willing to work 24/7 and do whatever it takes to help you out in any way that he can (which might even include offering crucial meat-recommendations if you're lucky enough!)

[–] havlin33 8 years ago

Best part of the movie is this thread!