MovieChat Forums > Jumping the Broom (2011) Discussion > Question to mothers with sons...

Question to mothers with sons...


Why are moms (not all) but some are soooo possessive of their sons?? They treat them like they're their husband and lover. They also tend to baby them strip their manhood (especially single moms tend to do that the most). I know other women have different reasons why they Lord over their boys. But that is not healthy, looking at how Mrs. Taylor was behaving in this movie just let's you know how boys need a male figure in their life. I don't have kids but if I did especially boys... I would NOT want to keep my son under my thumb forever like that, I would want him fly on his own ... Cause after all mommy won't always be around. I know it's just a movie but they're really women like this, that "Own" their sons and I just had to post this question...why??

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[deleted]

WOW now that's different.. your son has special needs... But it's good you still let him grow and mature on his own as much as he could.. cause you won't always be around. And I can't imagine how challenging it was to raise him. But it sounds like you did a good job, if he's independent :-)

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Truthfully, I know very few mothers who cling to their sons. But you're right, some (but very few) do. When that's the case, I look to the mother's relationship with hr husband. Often, there is not much of a relationship there. Perhaps the mom is looking for a substitute? What matters though is how the son handles it. Does he stand up to his mom and draw clear boundaries? Does he say he doesn't like it but act otherwise? Is the son willing to do what it takes to make sure mom knows her place? As his mother, "her place" is a very special one forever, but a son -- or any child -- only needs "mommy" making decisions and calling the shots for only so long.

My son (an only child) is in his early 30's and he was only 3 when I became a single mom. Since his dad had some problems, they didn't always see each other or see eye to eye on many things, then his dad died when my son was 17. So my son didn't have a consistent male role model in his life. But I knew my job was to give him some solid roots as well as the wings to fly. We have a great relationship, and I know he values my advice and opinions which I give IF he asks. He's on his own, with a great job, and has recently been dating a young accomplished woman that I think (and hope) could be the one. If she is, my son will probably move out of state and potentially across the country. I'll be very sad if that happens, but I won't let him know that. Since it was my job to help him develop his wings, how can I resent his using them? That's not the way it's supposed to work, IMO.

Based on my own experience, I'm not sure a clingy mom or a dependent son happens because of a lack of a strong male role model. I think it happens more when parents don't understand that their role ultimately is to let go and, if necessary, kick the baby bird out of the nest. Whether you kick them out or they go on their own, you can rejoice in watching them fly and take comfort in knowing you did your job.

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I have no idea why some women are like that. My husband's mother is like that to a degree, but I have never met one like that crazy cow Mrs. Taylor in the movie. I don't think it is healthy at all to treat your son like he is your husband. There is a fine line between love and obsession.

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