A Review of "Lizzie"

“Lizzie Borden Took an Ax, and Gave Her Mother 40 Whacks” Gee, they were original with that tagline, weren’t they? Anything involving the Lizzie Borden murder case will catch my attention, which is unfortunate, because it caused me to watch this piece of garbage. Titled Lizzie, and transparently involving the Borden ax murders from 1892, this is probably the most pointless horror movie ever made—a movie that would have to come up multiple levels to even be considered bad. The main character grew up in a house that was somehow connected to the Borden murders, where the events of the past manage to recreate themselves over and over again in the present. This house, which is not the iconic Borden house of Fall River, and its connection are never fully explained, but then that was a common theme present throughout. The characters and their actions make no sense. Things happen without reason. There are so many flashbacks and hallucinations that you could fall out of your chair watching it. When something that does make sense actually occurs, you find yourself forgetting why it makes sense. The cinematography could only make it bearable for so long. For a supposed action or horror movie, it is incredibly slow, and to be blunt, extremely stupid. There actually are some pretty big actors in this, including Corbin Bernsen (tolerable), Don Swayze (okay, I guess; but he has only 30 seconds of screen-time), and Gary Busey, who held the cast together while being in an almost stoned state. Simply put, Busey is horrific. He appears to have had so much plastic surgery done on his face that he can’t close his mouth, showing off a set of teeth that could probably cut through concrete. He does not even speak, he merely grunts his lines. He does not even try to act: he just runs in and out of scenes with craziness and irrelevance, as Andrew Borden, Lizzie’s father. Strangely enough, the movie reaches its peak of cinematic quality every time Busey is on-screen. As someone who loves cerebral movies that go back and forth between reality and fantasy, this quickly became too much. I kept looking at the clock every ten minutes because I could not wait for it to be over. Never in my life have I rooted so hard for characters to die such violent deaths, and they could not come soon enough. The combination of plot, acting, and special effects made me wish that the spirit of Lizzie Borden could somehow travel through another dimension and bash me in the head 40 times with an ax. Also starring Amanda Baker. Directed by David Dunn Jr. Final Verdict: Burn the Tape.

Shared from: https://pictureinparagraph.wordpress.com/2015/02/09/review-lizzie-2012 /