Bad bad, not good bad

Was really excited to watch this, as I'm a fan of good schlock, but MAN, this was just a bizarre, miserable experience.

Double Down is like a horrible art film, where absolutely nothing makes any sense and you can only sit back and watch in disbelief. It's so awful on every single level, I really can't explain what you're in for. Tonnes of random stock footage, lots of shots of Neil in his car (parked in a single desert location for the majority of the movie) pretending to work on a multitude of laptops (none of which are turned on), endless shots of Neil clumsily scampering up rocky hills (he stumbles and falls every time they cut to one of these shots), people's heads shot against bur sky talking to nobody in particular, and voiceover. LOTS and LOTS of voiceover. Like seriously, almost 3/4 of the movie must be voiceover.

And for all the voiceover, I still had absolutely NO idea what was happening on screen. Nada.

The best scene is one where the main character (posing as a chauffeur) drives some newlyweds to their hotel. They're clearly not moving, and you can even see a parked car through the back window, which doesn't move for the entire scene. He offers them "champagne", which looks like colourless soda water, and they all pretend to continue driving. With a stationary parking lot in the background. I couldn't make this up.