MovieChat Forums > Playing for Keeps (2012) Discussion > Probably too heavy a question for this f...

Probably too heavy a question for this film...

posted 12 years ago by nick-1036
19 replies | jump to latest

But is anyone else turned off by relationship films where the guy falters but the woman does nothing herself and gets away with it? His wife says in the trailer, when addressing his failures, "you were the best thing that ever happened to me." Is that what women think and feel, that a guy comes along and becomes "the best thing that ever happened to them"? Is he good for anything else now that he doesn't have a good job?

My point is, what does she bring to the table, her looks, her ability to have a baby, isn't it half his baby? I don't get it, it seems we are still stuck in the 1950's with these films. The man is expected to be a high achiever, and that means his job and money, and the woman is there to keep him on the straight and narrow or crush him when he fails to live up to her expectations.

Kind of old fashioned, isn't, as well as unfair to men and boring and predictable.

[–] 12 years ago

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[–] jbcstaff 12 years ago

Jessica's character isn't sitting around waiting for Gerard to get better, she moved on? She's getting re-married...

I understand the 'point' you're trying to make, it just doesn't work for this film.

[–] 12 years ago

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[–] nick-1036 12 years ago

From the trailer it looks like she is just there to reprimand him and he is there to win or re-win her approval which he does through a good job and being a nice guy (nice according to her). I dislike this dynamic and stand by my loves and my friends when they falter. My original post is trying to say: people fall into this dynamic as if it's sanctioned by society, that men must perform according to women's rules, and I think that is unfair to men in general. The same thing is sanctioned by divorce courts and the marriage contract itself. Although I am aware that many men are challenging this these days, and winning.

This film makes him look like a loser just because he's looking for a job. Pathetic, and the wrong message at a time in our society where many deserving, good people are looking for jobs, and getting blamed as if it's their own fault. But this "fantasy" sells movie tickets to people who buy into this fantasy, I get it. But I don't like it.

[–] Larue1872 12 years ago

Nick, when did you get to see the movie? The rest of us are having to wait until its December release so we really can't answer your questions knowledgeably right now.

[–] lamont-hard 12 years ago

The thing is Rom-Com movies are on a steep decline because they simply do not appeal to men, film makers cannot put together a great film using the same formulas over and over. The groups that these type of movie appeal to are not enough to bring in the big bucks any longer especially when men could care less about seeing themselves in such a pathetic manner. So they are trying to soften up how men feel about them making them more male oriented instead of consistently making films of male abusers or workaholics. I think Hollywood got the message of how tiring this genre became of making American males looking so pathetic is not exactly a formula for making a worthy film...Just my opinion

[–] jbcstaff 12 years ago

Were Rom/Coms aka Chick Flicks ever directed at men? Hmmmm. don't think so.

[–] lamont-hard 12 years ago

I feel they are directed to whom ever wants to see this type of film weather it was men or woman. I get the feeling by your reply that you may have misread what i was saying. But To each is his own.

[–] nick-1036 12 years ago

In a similar vein, I just saw Everything Must Go. Absolutely amazing they don't show the guys wife at all just as everything she does has power over him. Of course, he hurt her by sleeping with a co worker and falling off the wagon, so anything goes for her revenge, right? I thought alcoholism was a disease, but I guess not if you sleep with someone else when you are drunk and get fired from your job, then it's not an illness it's something to be severely punished, as in, taking all your money and your house, and your job... forever. Go figure. The irony of EMG is that they inform him in the story that the woman who sued him and his company for sexual harassment, and lost him his job, was a con artist who had done it several times before. It was even stated that he had the right to sue back for his job since it was revealed she was a criminal and a liar. But the damage and revenge had already come from his wife, who obviously never considered he was set up. A really sickening scenario if you ask me.

By the way, it's true I am commenting on the trailer, but like most trailers these days you can easily see the tone and plot in 2 minutes. I'll admit that the film may be far better than the trailer indicates (to me).

[–] lamont-hard 12 years ago

Great post, I saw that movie also and agree with what you are saying. These type of movies are on a decline because as i say men don't care for them and without there dollars we can see they don't do very well at the box office or even later in DVD sales. It''s odd how these movies get even made even with a major star as this movie had.

[–] nick-1036 12 years ago

Modern males in film stories, that are perceived as entitled and spoiled and screw ups, have been lambasted for years. I don't think anyone really enjoys the shame these films put them through, although it appears that the film characters (the women) do. But I don't think the audience, male or female, sees real life like this, I think intelligent, caring people try to live and let live.

Vengeful women in films, women who must punish lazy, incompetent men, is very common. I can't possibly know if this translates or exacerbates the issue in real life, I simply don't know if the plethora of these films inspire women to punish or shun slacker men. Most men I know in real life are hard working, caring, loving people. I guess films about them would be perceived as boring, and untrue.

[–] lamont-hard 12 years ago

Yet another good reply from you, If I can just cover the other side of your reply there are a ton of movies where the guy is in the army and loses his wife or a guy left at the alter and so on theses type of movies are some of the ones where men have become turned off by them. Film makers can care less how young men (teens boys feel) about seeing these type of things and getting the message of "Oh" this is how hard working men are rewarded. That is what I mean by men being turned off by rom-coms because it is sometimes the hard worker with thrown in he is arrogant or not pleasant enough to get the gal for whatever reason to enhance her getting her happiness.

It is something that almost all men notice but most keep quiet about it to our wives or galfriends. some guys it bothers, some guys tolerate it, and then there are some who will not wants there sons to see this type of film if they can help it. I don't think many people are as smart as you make them out to be some do translate it into real life situations.

How will so many young boys who are products of divorce or with single mothers learn anything. This is what they see and in some cases this is what they learn. That is why I feel men do not care to see these films they tend to show how broken we are in a comedic way. And show very little of a hard working men even if he is not perfect can get the gal also. When was the last time you saw a father and son movie, or heck even a mother to son movie where she talks of any real qualities of good men.

[–] nick-1036 12 years ago

It's sometimes hard for me to come to any conclusions about this because I get distracted, and conflicted, by evolution and biological imperative. Now I don't mean to get deep but male female relationships are directed by nature to a large degree yet we live in a time where women can have babies without men and population in general is in a sense perverted by it's large numbers. Meaning, the instinct to procreate or to perform the act of procreation is so far removed from "necessary for survival" that it actually now borders on a threat to survival. How does this evidence itself in day to day relationships? Easy, men and women are as desperate to get together as they ever were but end up quickly hating each other for it. Notice how the average age of marriage keeps creeping up, notice how the divorce rate is so high, notice how many people live alone, notice how many women pair up with each other?

I just can't divorce my perceptions of the nature of relationships as it applies to nature and the very nature of life on this planet. It seems we are far beyond a tipping point that almost no one acknowledges and instead end up debating the motives of commercially driven Hollywood writers who couldn't care less about the true state of humans and society other than to exploit people's confusion, and desire, with pablum.

[–] BigRich 11 years ago

Film makers can care less how young men (teens boys feel) about seeing these type of things and getting the message of "Oh" this is how hard working men are rewarded. That is what I mean by men being turned off by rom-coms because it is sometimes the hard worker with thrown in he is arrogant or not pleasant enough to get the gal for whatever reason to enhance her getting her happiness.

I would hope that men, young and old, realize that these are just "movies" and can separate fantasy from reality.

Nah... the only thing that turns me off of rom-coms are the same plot re-used, re-written, not necessarily to the degree in which you're describing it though. I'd still watch them, as my wife likes a good rom-com and I like to see her happy. She sure doesn't like my sci-fi movies. Anyhow, there should be more rom-coms that also blend with other genres just to keep things different, for example, Safety Not Guaranteed, this may be considered an Indy movie, or even a sci-fi movie, but it had elements of comedy, romance and sci-fi. That movie was a pleasant surprise for us. Or for the rom-com-action/sports, I would recommend Goon, another surprising good "Indy" movie.

_
Every person that served can be called a veteran, but not every veteran can be called a Marine.

[–] 11 years ago

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[–] mikeyflatley 11 years ago

i think u missed da story. she wuz alwayz there 4 da kid while he wuz alwayz away in his soccer gamez. now he try 2 make up 4 lost time.

wat she brought 2 da table wuz she basically raised da kid herself. while he still needz 2 grow some ballz.

Werd 2 ur mudda, bruddafcker

[–] nemidwest 11 years ago

Geez Mikey, you actually make a good point. It was also inferred that George cheated on his wife. Some good points are made on this thread, but the fact remains both men and women are shallow in this movie. Neither is portrayed with any depth, which is why it performed so poorly. Lousy script in general.

[–] 11 years ago

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[–] Helenlaurence 9 years ago

I think this is a really good point about romcoms in general.
Specially starring Katherine heigl for some reason!
Slacker man who lets the woman down in some way. Good woman who helps him to become a better person. Over and over and over... I don't get it either!
It's not very flattering to either the man or woman (the woman is usually seen as too 'uotight') and nothing is really learned.
I spose they're meant to redeem each other but I don't think they really work.